http://popealien.comThe latest transcribed PopeAlien comics, powered by OhNoRobot.comen-ushttp://popealien.com/assets/banners/popealien468a.gifhttp://popealien.comSat, 25 Mar 2006 20:49:37 EST http://popealien.com/comic/52<a href="http://popealien.com/comic/52">Grimthrax the Mighty</a><BR /><BR />[[ a busy city street intersection - a large horned toothy monster is blocking a truck in the intersection ]] <BR />&lt;&lt; beep! honk! &gt;&gt; <BR />Grimthrax: Puny Mortals! Bow Down before GRIMTHRAX the MIGHTY! <BR /> <BR />Grimthrax: You must bring me tribute or face my WRATH! <BR /> <BR />driver: Hey you big freak! You're getting SPITTLE on my Sport Utility Vehicle! [[ waving a cell phone]] I'm calling the COPS! <BR /> <BR />[[ Driver gesturing to hood of SUV, Grimthrax with arms crossed ]] <BR />driver: But there's SPITTLE all over the hood! <BR />cop: I'm sorry sir.. you'll have to take it up with an elected official or the liberal news media... <BR />grimthrax: &lt;&lt;snort&gt;&gt; <BR /> <BR />cop: grimthrax is immune to prosecution under UN charter 90210 - you're on your own. <BR /> <BR />driver: Oh yeah? Well you just got yourself into one hell of a civil suit DROOL-BOY! <BR />grimthrax: Foolish Mortal! Do not tempt the wrath of Grimthrax! http://popealien.com/comic/74<a href="http://popealien.com/comic/74">Customer Service</a><BR /><BR />[[ customer service desk in department store ]] <BR /> <BR />customer: I'd like to return this product <BR />clerk: oh? <BR /> <BR />customer: yes. <BR />clerk: why? <BR /> <BR />customer: it gave me a rash and made me itch. <BR />clerk: oh? <BR /> <BR />customer: yes. <BR />clerk: Its epoxy. <BR /> <BR />customer: oh? <BR />clerk: yes. <BR /> <BR />customer: I thought it was skin cream.. <BR />clerk: no. http://popealien.com/comic/88<a href="http://popealien.com/comic/88">Ron Perlman and Bela Lugosi in gunsmoke</a><BR /><BR />[[ guy holding a box stands in front of a tank with gun turrent pointed at him ]] <BR /> <BR />tank driver: Lets play 'gunsmoke'. You be Ron Perlman and I'll be Bela Lugosi. <BR />guy: Uh. they werent in 'gunsmoke' <BR />tank driver: they are now. http://popealien.com/comic/96<a href="http://popealien.com/comic/96">Keeping time in the New Year</a><BR /><BR />anthony: did you set your clocks back? <BR />benoit: for what? <BR /> <BR />anthony: for the new year <BR />benoit: you dont set your clocks back for that. <BR /> <BR />anthony: I do <BR />benoit: no reasonable person sets their clocks back at new years. <BR />anthony: I've got my reasons <BR />benoit: such as? <BR /> <BR />anthony: I like to be different. http://popealien.com/comic/91<a href="http://popealien.com/comic/91">Abe Lincoln vs. Ronald McDonald</a><BR /><BR />[[ angry man stands at customer service desk ]] <BR /> <BR />angry: I've got a question <BR />clerk: yes? <BR /> <BR />angry: if Ronald McDonald and Abe Lincoln got in a fight, who would win? <BR />clerk: Sir? This is the customer service desk.. <BR />angry: just answer the question. <BR /> <BR />clerk: Ronald McDonald is a fictional character.. <BR />angry: and..? <BR /> <BR />clerk: ... <BR /> <BR />clerk: abe lincoln I guess.. <BR />angry: damn straight! http://popealien.com/comic/66<a href="http://popealien.com/comic/66">Extreme futurism is hep!</a><BR /><BR />phil: wazzuup? <BR />ted: can't you say hello like a normal person? <BR /> <BR />phil: all your base are belong to us.. <BR />ted: stop! all your memes are ancient and tiresome <BR /> <BR />phil: its 'hip' to be retro <BR />ted: not anymore. Now extreme futurism is hep. <BR /> <BR />phil: whats that mean? <BR />ted: it means you should go cryogenically preserve your head. http://popealien.com/comic/65<a href="http://popealien.com/comic/65">The pizza theory</a><BR /><BR />1: I've got a new theory.. <BR />2: yeah? <BR />1: It involves pizza. <BR />2: yum! <BR /> <BR />[[ akward pause ]] <BR /> <BR />2: are you going to tell me about it? <BR />1: what? <BR />2: Your pizza theory. <BR /> <BR />1: I cant do that. <BR />2: why? <BR />1: You might claim it as your own. <BR />2: oh. http://popealien.com/comic/100<a href="http://popealien.com/comic/100">The big issues</a><BR /><BR />[[ a press conference, leader is on a podium flanked by two jack-booted thugs ]] <BR />leader: ..and THATS why we need to remove your legs for freedom. Any questions? <BR /> <BR />audience1: I saw a nipple on the TV. <BR /> <BR />leader: we're talking about removing your legs <BR /> <BR />audience: how can they? <BR />leader: for freedom. <BR /> <BR />audience: no.. I mean how can they show nipples on tv? <BR />audience2: yeah! <BR />audience3: There ought to be a law! http://popealien.com/comic/135<a href="http://popealien.com/comic/135">impressive god</a><BR /><BR />[[ a popealien with an automatic rifle pointing it at another popealien ]] <BR /> <BR />ok. I can see your point.. <BR />.. you do have a very impressive god and I would like to join your church. http://popealien.com/comic/126<a href="http://popealien.com/comic/126">these messages</a><BR /><BR />[[ two guys sit on a couch watching tv ]] <BR />guy1: When I see cleavage I want to buy things... <BR /> <BR />guy2: Happy cartoon animals make me hungry. <BR /> <BR />guy1: I'm tired of seeing actors on TV play ordinary people. I want to see ordinary people on TV play actors. <BR /> <BR />guy2: I need something to express my rebellious individuality. <BR />guy1: have you tried cola? <BR /> <BR />guy1: Look! This product makes beautiful people burst into song and spontaneously start dancing!