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Header: Great Practical Joke #342: / Get millions of horror movie nerds to watch a romantic comedy
Woman: "Steve! I know you're a zombie, but I also know deep down, you remember me your high school sweetheart...don't you?"
Zombie: "Wait, wait...you're right. Sorry about trying to eat you. We should date."
Zombie: "I mean, we're both brilliant accountants-" / Woman: "Who've never been able to-" / Zombie and Woman: "Account for love."
[ Three nerds in the movie theater audience look horrified ]
Hamburglar: Robble robble! / Zombie: Braaains. / Hamburglar: Robble, robble! / Zombie: Braaains!
Caption: Nominating The Hamburglar as ambassador to Zombie Island was rapidly proving to be a mistake.
Zombie Kid 1: Braiiins! Braiiins? / Zombie Kid 2: Braiiins! / Billy: Spleens!
Caption: Billy just didn't get it.
Movie Screen: Coming this easter / A mel Gibson film / Passion of the christe II:
Caption: "Do unto others as you would have them BRAAAAINS!"
[ A man points to a white board that reads "homeless shelter + small pox = scene 43!" ]
Caption: I found some creative ways to extend our zombie movie's budget.
Header: The Graphvella: / Any story can be told in 3 charts or fewer
Header: Example 1: Zombie movie / Header: Fig. 1 / [ A pie chart of March shows a small amount of "infected population" while a pie chart of April shows a much larger amount ]
Header: Fig. 2 / [ A flow chart starts with "zombies are everywhere" and "is this guy is a zombie?" If the answer is "no," then proceed to "yes he is" and "death." If the answer is "yes," then "can you escape?" If "no," then "death" and if "yes," then "hide in a small confined space with a group of people from different backgrounds" and then "death." ]
Header: Fig. 3 / [ A line graph with x-axis "human history" and y-axis "biomass of human brains" slowly increases until a point where it drops to zero ]
Header: Example 2: Romantic comedy / Header: Fig. 1 / [ A bar graph titled "skills possessed by the male" has high bars in "intelligence," "senseof humor," and "hostage negotiation," but a very low bar in "love." Another bar graph titled "skills possessed by the female" has has high bars in "intelligence," "senseof humor," and "business negotiation," but a very low bar in "love." ]
Header: Fig. 2 / [ A line graph with x-axis "time" and y-axis "integrity of romantic relationship" has a slowly increasing line until a sudden drop at "contrived miscommunication" and then a sudden rise at "man humiliates self in charming and expensive manner." ]
Header: Example 3: Zombie romantic comedy / [ A line graph with x-axis "time" and y-axis "integrity of romantic relationship" has a slowly increasing line until a sudden drop at "contrived miscommunication" and then a sudden rise at "man humiliates self in charming and expensive manner." The line continues to riseuntil dropping once again at "man eats woman's face." ]
Woman: Well, personally, I just like, you know, going places. You know? Taking my time, getting the big picture...
Steve: I'm made entirely of brains!!!
Caption: The date went reasonably well until, as usual, Steve was eaten by zombies.
Man #1: "In all my years in film, I find the thing that scares people most...is silence. / Man #2: "That's very poetic. Do you-" / Man #1: "and ZOMBIES!"
Caption: "With, like, machine guns."
Grandfather: "Sweetie, there's no such thing as zombies. Your brother just made that up to scare you. Now, go back to...brains! BRAAAINS!"
Caption: "Brains" is the name of the glass eye that'd just fallen out of its socket.
Man #1: "Just shoot off their heads! Just shoot!" / Man #2: "I did! They keep coming!"
Caption: Once the chickens became zombies, the war was lost.
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