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So, what did you want to talk about? / I - I'm responsible for you getting hurt. / What? How do you figure that? I mean the way I see it, the lady who it me isn't even at fault. It was an accident because of all this... / You made it snow, didn't you? / Well... |
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I cast a spell last night and that's what made it snow. / I shouldn't have done it but I thought it would be fun. I didn't think... / You could have been hurt bad or killed. I'm sorry. / WOW. You did all this? / Uh yeah. I did. |
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Hello, Chelsea. Is your grandmother here? / Hello Agnes. / Yes, Ma'm. She is inside. Are you okay? / It's nothing much. My hip has been bothering me for the last couple of days. / Yep. It always flairs up when it's going to snow. |
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Ruth called me and told me about your "snow spell", and then I told her about my hip. / My right hip always begins hurting two days before a good snow. It never fails. / I didn't make it snow? / No, dear. I'm afraid you don't. / Well... well... well, damn! |
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Did you truly believe that snow spell would work? / Well, Sebastian was egging me on and... well,... no. / And that's why the spell didn't work. / You are a powerful witch, Chelsea, but you're not God. / And that, my dear kitten, is why it DID snow. |
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Howdy folks! After a two day love affair with my pain medication I am back in the captain's chair and ready to go to warp speed. / I want to thank everyone who called in with concern. Thanks mom! / And I must say, it has been an unusual couple of days. / Speaking of unusual, I just got a fax from the national weather center in response to my query about our surprise snow storm. / They shot back three pages and a graph describing what actually happened and why they floundered the forecast in the first place. / Well, I read it and, uh, if you ask me, in three pages and a graph, it basically says... nobody's perfect. / Oh, well. I'll put it all up on our web site just in case someone out there is interested. / And speaking of all this snow, ladies and gentlemen, you better enjoy it while you can. / Today's forecast calls for 52 degrees... / ... and sunny! |
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You know, it's odd how clothes are starting to look so... witchy. / Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything by that, I mean I like the clothes. / Don't worry about it. / Actually it's nice to know that fashion has finally caught up with me. |
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Do you think that if Jesus came back in this day and age he would use television as a means of exposure? / I would think so. / Of course the powers that be would have him on pay-per-view. |
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Grrrr / What's wrong? / Sometimes I hate computers. Drawing with a mouse is like drawing with an Etch-a-Sketch. / In a way, art has been destroyed by these things. The purity of line on paper is gone. / True, but I've never seen you draw a straighter line. |
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Okay now. We are going to try out a healing spell. / Cool. Who needs healing? / Ol' Sebo. / Sebastian? What's wrong with him? / Do you remember that pound of barbecue I left out for supper? / *Groan* I did not know that heaven could induce so much pain. |
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Oh-oh. Grnadma, this spell calls for "dried" potato peelings and I just cut fresh. / It'll take over an hour to dry them and... / Not so fast, kitten. Meet a witch's best friend. / The Ronco food dehydrator. Perfect for the witch of the new millennium. |
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Now rub this potato skin over Sebo's belly and recite this spell. / This spell? Are you sure? / Yes. This is a special spell I wrote out just for Sebo and his belly. / O-kay. / I say this with all my might, it just serves you right, you darn cat you, ate all our barbecue. / Peta! Help me please! |
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Space, the final place to go look at stuff. / These are the voyages of mankind, exploring not only his psyche, but numerous social issues too. / Our ongoing mission to seek out really cool people, and rockin' new planets. / To boldly go in brilliant psychedelic color where no one has gone before. / Captain's log: Stardate 3023.6. While in orbit of an uncharted planet an intruder has beamed on board the bridge. / The intruder was a female cat-creature, and a very beautiful one. / I am Chelseri from the planet Chatt-Reguli. You will leave orbit or I will destroy you. / We are... on a peaceful mission. We mean you... no harm. / You have 30 seconds to comply. / You are... a very beautiful. I am certain we can work something out. / 20 seconds. / By Baste's soul! I have seen the error of our ways. You are free to do with us what you will. / Fascinating. / Once again, human love and emotion conquer all. / We'll be in my quarters. You two mind the store. |
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This art gallery is crazy. This "thing" looks like a cat that was run over by a truck. / It is. / Man, I'm not a great lover of cats, but what's the freakin' deal? / Death is the deal. This piece hangs here to remind us that we are all doomed. Whether it's getting flattened by a semi, or fading away in our sleep. Death is important, as is life. / Your poetry is moving, but it still looks like a sail cat. / Yeah, it does make you want to play frisbee. |
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Y'know what? / What? / I think it's starting to rain. / And I thought the Gods were full of bladder today. |
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Sebastian? I've been having some rather odd thoughts about Jubal lately. He is rather cute. / Compared to a Toad Fish, perhaps. / Yawn! / I've always loved Jubal, but lately... / Why am I thinking like this... like I was... in love! / Why? Brain damage I would say. |
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Jubal? I'm in love with Jubal? He's my best friend. We can't be intimately involved. / I must agree. While it may fulfill Master Jubal's existence as a human being, the deed would most certainly destroy your friendship. / You're right. I can't think of Jubal that way again... / Oh the hell with it! Where's my mini-dress! |
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Miss Chelsea, when was the last time you transformed into the panther? / I haven't had a complete transformation since Halloween. / Quite a long time, wouldn't you say? / My guess is the panther is attempting to get out in order... / ... to mate. |
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Think about it. You have suddenly seen Master Jubal in a new and very personal light? Why? / Well maybe I am finally showing my true colors. The panther is part of me. Maybe I should indulge it more often. / And that includes edging out territorial competition. / Nonsense. I was here first. |
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Hello... Paul. / Uh, hi Chelsea? / I was, uh, waiting for Cynthia. I had to work late at the paper and we were going to have dinner together. / I was on my way to see Jubal, but then I saw you standing here... alone. / I bet you have wonderful genes. Near perfect, I bet. / Genes? Um, look, Chelsea I don't know what's gotten into you, but I'm having dinner with your sister. / Yes, you mentioned it all ready. / Did little sister ever tell you how we used to share "everything" when we were kids? / Hi-ho! 'sup Paul? Chels? / Uh? / Hey Chels, what's up... whoa! / What's with the threads? If you need extra money, I'm sure we could all pitch in. |
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So, what's up? / You tell me. What's with the street walker Barbie outfit? / Like it? I just wanted to look... special. / Oh, you look special. I can see special in several places. |
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Wh-what are you doing? / Can't I sit down and make myself comfortable? / Okay, who are you and what have you done with Chelsea? / Oooo, humor. That's intensely sexy. |
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Look, we need to talk about this. / Why? Are you AFRAID of me Jubal? / Well... actually,... I need to play another CD. / Put on Inagodadavida. Well have practically all night. |
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Chelsea, there is something very wrong with you. / There's nothing wrong with me! / I have embraced who and what I am. Right now I have chosen you, but if you are not up to the job... / ... I'll find someone who is! |
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Cyn, have you noticed anything peculiar lately about Chelsea? / Hmm, now Paul doesn't know that Chelsea is a witch or that she turns into a panther, so that reminds me that Leopard skin hat is on sale... / Hmmm, I wonder what Paul means? The only thing odd Chelsea's done lately is buy a mini-dress... / Chelsea may be a little heavy for a mini-dress, but still. |
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Chelsea made a pass at you? My sister? Chelsea Chattan? / But you're my husband. She would never do anything to hurt us. / I don't know what's wrong either. / I wonder if this is a witch thing, a panther thing, or just an ordinary SLUT thing? |
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What is it with men? / Let a woman be just a tiny bit sexually aggressive and they run away like scared rabbits! / But I know that Jubal wants an intimate relationship, so why can't he accept me as the instigator? Why!? / That macho bull just burns me up!! / Women have to go out and hunt the food to bring it back to our young, while the men just lay in the trees cleaning themselves! / We have to be aggressive to survive, but show it around a man and you get a face full of claws!! / I know what you mean. I KNOW what you mean. |
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Listen honey, aside from a couple of "clients" of mine; most guys like to be in charge. / Our job is to make it so men think they are in control, while we still steer the ship. So you gotta be sweet and gentle. / Sweet and gentle. Sound good. / Now leave, or I gut you like Cariboli! |
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Isn't this amazing! A she-panther in the wild, staking claim to mating terri'try! / Once she's run off her competition, she'll stand her ground against any other encroaching females. / When the coast is clear, the she-panther will go on the prowl for a new beau! / She's a beauty! |
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Look out! When the she-panther is looking for a mate, she can be extremely sexually aggressive! / In fact, bodily harm can occur! / That's it! That's got to be it!! / Chelsea's in heat! / Best thing to do is apologize, even if you haven't done anything. / ? / I got her by the leg now! |
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