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| Wealth and Fame, He's Ignored | [[A man, Dean, is watering a small patch of flowers.]]
/ Dean: Hey, have they ever made a comic where two people are making out, and first the woman whispers "Wealth and fame, he's ignored" and as they move to kiss, the guy says "Action is his reward"? / Flower: No Dean, they haven't. And I'm not an... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000031.html |
| When My Love Died | when my love died i went down into death after her / i am to lead her into life again / but i must not look back / no matter how irritating her singing gets http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000032.html |
| Too Complicated | [[Cactus and girl are standing looking at one another.]]
/ Cactus: I just don't think prostitution should be legal.
/ Girl: That's a pretty sex-negative attitude. / [[Cactus looks angry. Girl is covering her mouth with both hands and looking upset.]]
/ Cactus: I think that related issues of coercion and... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000033.html |
| Hey Man, Wait Wait! | Hey man, wait wait! / Before you jump, there's something you have to know / 'TAG!
/ You're it! http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000034.html |
| Dear World | Dear World,
/ By the time you read this, I will be dead. The pain has become too much for me to bear. I am sorry.
/ David. / Hey, I got your note. / You were totally wrong about that being dead thing. I even had time to make waffles. / Woah, hey, what are you doing? I didn't make enough for both... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000035.html |
| I've Been Up Here For 35 Years | I'VE BEEN UP HERE FOR 35 YEARS.
/ WHEN THEY FINALLY FIND ME, I'LL BE CROWNED THE GREATEST HIDE-AND-SEEK PLAYER OF ALL TIME. / AH HA! I FINALLY FOUND YOU! / NOW COME ON AND HELP US FIND DAVE. / RATS... I FORGOT ABOUT DAVE... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000036.html |
| Maybe That Was A Sign Is All | Girl: Dude, I'm not going to go out with you. All you say to me are variations on cheesy pick-up lines. I'm sorry. / Girl: So here's your answer: no. / Richard: Come on! We just got off on the wrong foot. Here, let's start over.
/ Hello! I'm Richard. / Richard: You're looking good today, b- / [[lamp... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000037.html |
| Man, All You Ever Talk About Is Relationships | Count: So do you think she ever thinks about me? / Skeletor: Man! All you ever talk about is relationships.
/ Count: Do not!
/ Skeletor: This is you. / [[Skeletor squats with arms out]] / Count: That's not at all like m-
/ Skeletor: "Relationships!" http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000038.html |
| You Look So Pretty In Red, Allene | [[A couple is getting intimate in their living room while a monster hides in the shadow.]]
/ David: You look so pretty in red, Allene.
/ Allene: Hee hee!
/ David: I love your legs, Ally. / David: Your hips, / David: your tummy, / David: the small of your back, your kisses . . . / < http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000039.html |
| The Subject Has Been Largely Compliant | verall, the subject has been largely compliant and is for all in
/ cents and purposes the model inmate. His behaviour has been non-
/ isruptive for the most part and staff and other inmates report
/ is,
/ an
/ ile it
/ bo
/ y bel
/ ile it is
/ is doe no
/ ser to
/ g cured. In fact
/ ld make
/ ne has retreated
/ into... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000040.html |
| Oh Wells | [[Man walks next to a lamp pole]] / [[Lamp pole bends as man stands on it]]
/ Man: *sigh* Dan was right.
/ It really IS a lame power to sell my soul for. http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000041.html |
| Lost In An MP3 Playlist | There
/ Lost in an mp3 playlist, he can forget his life for a few moments. / He can forget that his daughter found a man to love, but who could not love her, who told her he was disgusted by the tattoo. / ah, yes... the tattoo. / A SPACE UNICORN SMOKING A JOINT AND GIVING A COP THE FINGER?
/ WHAT IS... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000042.html |
| Can We? | Can we have sex now?
/ just one more, honey. http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000043.html |
| I Went To High School With That Guy | I went to high school with that guy.
/ No you didn't / I did too! I remember his little mustache! / Honey, no. Please. That's new growth hair. / I'll prove it. Excuse me! Did you go to Canterbury High School in Ottawa Ontario? / Sure didn't, sir! / Please excuse my husband. He thinks he went... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000044.html |
| Hey Shera Do You Want To Play Video Games | [[Danny and Shera sitting on a sofa, holding game console controllers]]
/ Danny: HEY SHERA DO YOU WANT TO PLAY VIDEO GAMES?
/ Shera: WE'RE ALREADY PLAYING, DANNY... / [[Shera pointing at the B button]]
/ Shera: IS THIS THE B BUTTON? / [[Image from the television screen. A person doing a high kick]]
/ {{Caption:... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000045.html |
| I Have Read A Lot About Them Though | [[Ryan and a Female are sitting at a bar, awkwardly facing away from each other. The woman is smoking.]]
/ Ryan: So, um, how did you manage to date someone you've only just met? How did you stop from feeling ridiculous? I've, um - I've only ever dated friends before.
/ Female: Huh? Oh, you get used to... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000046.html |
| I Have Read A Lot About Them Though | [[A man (Ryan) and a woman are sitting at a bar.]] / Ryan: So, um, how did you manage to date someone you've only just met? How do you stop from feeling ridiculous? I've, um - I've only ever dated friends before.
/ Woman: Huh? Oh, you get used to it. You trust the other person is feeling just as ridiculous... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/index.pl?comic=46/ |
| He Says That I've Played Myself Out | [[A woman and a bipedal deer in armor, wielding a bow, stand in a wood.]]
/ Deer: He says that I've played myself out. That I'm not as clever as I used to be. / Deer: He says I'm old news.
/ Woman: Are you? / [[He turns away from her]]
/ Deer: Well, I still think I'm interesting. / [[Behind the deer... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000047.html |
| John... | [[Woman looks off to the side, her head tilted forlornly]]
/ Woman: JOHN... / [[Man ponders]]
/ Man: WOULD I NAME HIM AFTER MY GRANDFATHER?? / [[Man grins]]
/ Man: YES!!! "LUKE" IT IS! / [[close up of Woman's face, she is smiling]]
/ Woman: I'M BEING HELD PRISONER!!!!! / [[Woman and Man hold one another,... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000048.html |
| Comixpedia Review | Welton: Hello, I'm Welton Colbert and today I'm going to review Whispered Apologies. It's a comic where artists send in comics without words and other people write for them.
/ I'm also topless, but you don't need to worry about that right now. It's just the human body. There's no shame in it.
/ D-Darlings. / Whispered... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000049.html |
| Is That A Four Leaf Clover? | [[young man 1 and a young woman 1 stand on a rock on the right side]]
/ Shit. Is that a four leaf clover? / [[Young woman 2 and young man 2 stand on another rock, young man 2 making a waving/come here gesture]]
/ Hey guys! We found a four leaf clover! / [[All four people stand on the first rock]]
/ Oh... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000050.html |
| Dutch Elm Disease? | DUTCH ELM DISEASE?? HOW THE HELL DO YOU EVEN GET DUTCH ELM DISEASE?? / I AM NOT A TREE! / YOU THERE! / I WATCHED YOU DRIVE OFF AFTER YOU DENTED MY CHARIOT!!!!! / SHIT. / SO.. UMM... WELL.. UM.. I'M, UHH, I'VE GOT DUTCH ELM DISEASE AND, UM, IT MAKES A MAN ... CRAZY. / I WILL TAKE YOUR FACE AS RECOMPENSE. / YOUR... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000051.html |
| Some Distressed Text | [[A punk boy in a bright blue shirt that reads: "feminists do it better" looks at the reader. His mouth is dripping blood and he is grinning. He catches the dripping blood in his right hand.]]
/ some distressed text / [[Zooms in to his face]]
/ blah blah / [[Zooms in on his mouth]]
/ whatever http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000052.html |
| Commitment Sticks | BREAKING UP USED TO BE SIMPLE, EASY!! / BURNING PHOTOS.. NO PROBLEM! / WHY DID WE EXCHANGE COMMITMENT STICKS??? http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000053.html |
| Tree Of Wishes | [[A robot is standing in front of a tree. It's cloudy.]]
/ Robot: Tree of wishes, my journey has been long. Can you tell me what it's like to truly love someone? / [[Eyes and a mouth appear on the tree.]]
/ Tree: You have used your wish well, gentle robot. True love is as a cool rain on a warm summer's... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000054.html |
| My Girlfriend Is Pregnant | Guy #1: My girlfriend is pregnant.
/ Yes. / Guy #2 (off screen): I take it this is unexpected? / Guy #1: Well, not entirely unexpected. We were using the withdrawal method. / Guy #2: That's a terrible method of birth control. / Guy #1: I know. I guess maybe we just wanted a child, subconsciously? / Guy#2:... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000055.html |
| I'm Just Not Processing Whatever It Is That You're Saying | Boy: I... I'm sorry. I'm just not processing whatever it is that you're saying. / Girl: I'm dumping your ass! Adios! Sayonara! With me now? No more sex! / Boy: Is this about the shirt I've got on? It's a little dirty, but I didn't think you'd make this big a deal. I can go change. / Girl: Sweetie.... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000056.html |
| Here Comes The Projection Fairy | NARRATION (SONG): HERE COMES THE PROJECTION FAAAAAAIRY! / PROJECTION FAIRY: DOOT-DOO-DOOOOO! / FRANK: AH HELL. / PROJECTION FAIRY: HI FRANK! / FRANK: HIYA MARY. HOW ARE YA? / PROJECTION FAIRY/MARY: TERRIBLE! BUT I GUESS THAT'S JUST THE HAND I'VE BEEN DEALT, RIGHT? / FRANK: WHAT'S... *SIGH* WHAT'S... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000057.html |
| It Was Some Party! | [[Two women address the fourth wall]]
/ Neve: Excuse me sir, but my friend and I are trying to settle an argument. Who would win in a game of soccer baseball: a team of baseball players, or a team of soccer players? Mary can't figure out which skills would come into play more. / Sarah: It's true. I can't... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000058.html |
| Oh, And 'Little Giants'. | Tim: And, um... / Tim: Oh! And "Little Giants" / Other Guy: THANK YOU. That's enough, Tim! Jesus! / Tim: It still counts. It's a Rick Moranis movie that can describe our situation. / Other Guy: The most infuriating part is that you'd ignore "Honey I Shrunk The Kids", but suggest "Parenthood". / Tim:... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000059.html |
| The First Page Of The Greatest Love Story Ever Written | [[A giant wearing nothing but shorts, on a road leading from a beach. A woman at his feet.]]
/ GREETINGS! I AM THE FROM THE LAND OF GIANTS. ALSO I AM NEW IN TOWN. COULD YOU SHOW ME AROUND? IT GETS LONELY SOMETIMES IN THE LAND OF GIANTS. / [[The woman appears amazed.]]
/ Oh my God! A giant! This is incredible!
/ Of... http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000060.html |