You're browsing the archives of Overcompensating.
You can search these comics too.
show: [ full transcriptions | abridged transcriptions | just the first line ]
| Driving Miss Dongle Part One | [[ Topato Potato and Sheriff Pony are crawling in a super-heated landscape ]]
/ Narrator: BUTTER DIMENSION 360 DEGREES
/ Topato Potato: Death draws near, Sheriff Pony. Earthlings have all but forgotten about us and soon we will face our judgement. Is your soul prepared?
/ Sheriff Pony: I am far from prepared for expiration by solar radiation! / [[ Jeffrey has a cell phone strapped to his head, and is speaking to The Englishman ]]
/ Narrator: NORTHAMPTON, MASSACHUSETTS
/ Jeffrey: God dangit The Englishman, did you steal my ideas? How come I can't think of nothin' to make comics about?
/ The Englishman: Why don't you just make a story involving those silly little potato and pony characters of yours?
/ Jeffrey: Fine, I will! / [[ Topato Potato and Sheriff Pony are sunbathing on purple mats, with drinks ]]
/ Narrator: LATER IN BUTTER DIMENSION 360 DEGREES
/ Topato Potato: Ah, another wonderful day absorbing ultraviolet rays! If you ask me, our sun is not hot enough!
/ Sheriff Pony: Agreed! / [[ Topato Potato and Sheriff Pony, floating in a multicolored Seuss-like landscape ]]
/ Narrator: LATER
/ Topato Potato: At last, my skin done has returned to exotic, toasty brown! I feel very attractive!
/ Sheriff Pony: Ultraviolet rays have an inverse effect on my skin, Topato! I become albino and feral!
/ Sheriff Pony: SNORT / Sheriff Pony: Topato, have you had a chance to read the news today?
/ Topato Potato: Of course I haven't! / [[ Close-up of the newspaper headlines, with front and profile mug shots of Princess Dongle ]]
/ Newspaper headline: PRINCESS DONGLE ARRESTED OPERATING VEHICLE WHILE UNDER INFLUENCE OF INTOXICATING LIQUID, POSSIBLY GRAPE-FLAVOURED CITIZENS UNCONCERNED http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060912.html |
| Driving Miss Dongle Part Two | Topato Potato: Princess, with all due respect, operating a motorcar under the influence of intoxihol is a disgustingly shameful and degenerate offense.
/ Princess Dongle: I am swollen with regret, Topato. / [[ Sheriff Pony appears to be using a telephone headset ]]
/ Princess Dongle: My only hope is that my royal father is not informed of my embarrassing mistake.
/ Sheriff Pony: ...under the influence of intoxihol, your majesty! / Princess Dongle: Sheriff Pony, to whom are you speaking?!
/ Sheriff Pony: -Nothing! / Princess Dongle: Nevertheless, for my punishment I have been given a drug that makes it impossible to operate a motorcar for 90 days. I require a chauffeur.
/ Topato Potato: I can provide that service.
/ Topato Potato: As soon as I regain sobriety. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060913.html |
| Driving Miss Dongle Part Three | [[ Topato Potato is lying down ]]
/ Princess Dongle: Arise, Topato! The time has come for me to utilize your chauffeur services!
/ Topato Potato: I... I was not aware you were serious about that / [[ Topato Potato wears a chauffeur's uniform, while Princess Dongle holds a martini glass of pink liquid ]]
/ Princess Dongle: I do not know why I never previously employed a chauffeur! Now I am free to consume as much intoxihol as I desire without consequence!
/ Topato Potato: Too true. / [[ Topato and the Princess walk towards a vehicle ]]
/ Topato Potato: I will require coordinates for our destination, your majesty.
/ Princess Dongle: Topato, the destination is irrelevant compared to the joy of the journey!
/ Topato Potato: Aimless meandering?
/ Princess Dongle: Sight-seeing.
/ Topato Potato: Bar-hopping?
/ Princess Dongle: To the Realm of Instant Regret! http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060914.html |
| Driving Miss Dongle Part Four | [[ Exterior of the Princess' flying black vehicle ]]
/ Princess Dongle: Topato, are you trying to give me motion sickness?
/ Topato Potato: Apologies, my liege! I am unfamiliar with the handling characteristics of this cumbersome vessel! / [[ The flight deck; Topato is at the controls as the Princess' voice is heard over the intercom. ]]
/ Princess Dongle: Have we arrived at destination yet Topato? I detest the flavors of our stock of intoxihol!
/ Topato Potato: We are insanely near. / [[ Princess Dongle, riding in the back seat ]]
/ Princess Dongle: Boredom consumes me! The programs on television seem trite and unnecessary!
/ Princess Dongle: Sing me a song, Topato! / [[ Exterior view of the Princess' black vehicle narrowly avoiding a green-stained flying semi ]]
/ << SCREE!>>
/ Topato Potato: Wretched service vehicles which assume complete proprietorship of the entire thoroughfare!
/ << HOOOONK >> / [[ Topato waving his fist out the window ]]
/ Topato Potato: Perhaps if you had placed more importance on education in your youth you would not find such a demeaning occupation necessary to sustain your menial existence! / [[ The truck driver flipping the bird ]]
/ Truck Driver: Auto-copulate, aristocrat! / [[ Interior view of Topato's reaction ]]
/ Topato Potato: So furious is my rage that I fear my very heart may leap from my body and pummel those scoundrels on its own volition, leaving my body a convulsing membrane of regret! http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060915.html |
| Driving Miss Dongle Part Five | [[ The robot driver of a green-stained trucker ship yells out the window ]]
/ Trucker: Death to the monarchy! Eviscerate the aristocrats! / [[ Topato, yelling from Princess Dongle's black ship ]]
/ Topato Potato: The ignorant whore that birthed you is as corpulent as a low-income American Earth-child! / [[ Topato in his chauffeur outfit, turned around and addressing the Princess from the driver's seat ]]
/ Topato Potato: Princess, I must exit the vehicle for several moments in order to bathe in the blood of those imbeciles! / [[ Princess Dongle waving her drink from the back seat ]]
/ Princess Dongle: No, Topato! Even if I wasn't impaired by the intoxihol I have consumed, the drug I was given as punishment for operating a vehicle while intoxicated makes it impossible for me to operate a vehicle! / [[ Topato, flying away from the Princess' ship ]]
/ Topato Potato: I can no longer hear you, your Highness! Please repeat your words when I return! / [[ Topato floating in front of the truck drivers' ship ]]
/ Topato Potato: Your rude behavior and unseemly attitude toward authority has not gone unnoticed, service workers. For the next five seconds you will contemplate your actions; you will know five seconds have passed when the sudden onset of excruciating pain becomes too powerful to bear. / [[ The Princess' ship begins to spiral downward out of control ]] / [[ Princess Dongle hanging onto a ship control stick by one hand, floating in the air ]]
/ Princess Dongle: I am certain there is a lesson in all of this -- if only I knew what it was! http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060918.html |
| New Shirts Look Totally Great | [[A picture of an orange ROCKTOBER shirt and a black Cowboy Killers hoodie.]] / {{alt text: Brunetto does great work!}} http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060919.html |
| Driving Miss Dongle Part Six | [[ Topato, floating, talking on the phone and holding the severed head of a robot trucker. A robot arm floats nearby. ]]
/ Topato Potato: Sheriff Pony, the Princess' limousine is careening toward the ground.
/ Topato Potato: Request assistance, please / [[ Sheriff Pony, wearing a stained wifebeater, sits on a stained purple couch with clothing and detrius strewn about ]]
/ Sheriff Pony: Topato, I have become feral as a result of overexposure to ultraviolet rays! I am unable to do non-feral things! / [[ Topato, flying ]]
/ Topato Potato: Rancid feces! My desire to deliver undignified punishments to those scoundrels has interfered with my sacred obligation to safely shauffeur our fair Princess!
/ Topato Potato: Damn my sense of justice. / [[ A shot from above of the crashed ship far below ]] / [[ Princess Dongle, emerges from the wreckages, dirty, one eye opened ]] / [ Shot from above, the Princess lying face down on the ground surrounded by parts of her wrecked ship. Topato calls out to her from off panel. ]] / [[ Topato hovers over the Princess ]]
/ Topato Potato: Princess! I demand you resume your life force! / [[ The Princess, now standing, addresses Topato ]]
/ Princess Dongle: I am fine, Topato! My level of intoxication created a relaxes state in my body which allowed me to survive the crash!
/ Topato Potato: Praise Allah! / [[ Topato, hovering in front of a gray background, wearing a striped prison uniform ]]
/ Narrator: SOON
/ Topato Potato: I have failed most ultimately. I desire judg-ment in the court of my own conscience!
/ Topato Potato: Princess! http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060920.html |
| Driving Miss Dongle Part Seven | [[ Topato wearing judges robes and a wig, holding a gavel , behind a desk that reads (in part): JUSTICE - FUN. The desk also appears to have a large red button on its top surface. ]]
/ Topato Potato: Topato Potato, you stand before this court charged with failing to protect the Princess from harm. How do you plead? / [[ Topato floats to the left, doffing the wig and robes and is wearing the striped prisoner uniform underneath ]] / [[ Topato the prisoner defendant ]]
/ Topato Potato: Your excellency, I was momentarily enraged by the careless activity of a fellow motorist. I plead guilty. / [[ Topato floats to the right, back behind the desk in judge's wig and robes ]]
/ Topato Potato: Detestable. For your punishment, I offer two options - one scenario requires you to complete one anger management session. The other scenario is permanent exile. / [[ Topato enters from the left, again as prisoner ]]
/ Topato Potato: I choose... exile.
/ Narrator: TO BE CONTINUED http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060921.html |
| Missile Crisis Free To Look At | THE CASE OF THE MISSILE CRISIS
/ Is finally available for free viewing (minus the extras of course)! To celebrate we are having a permanent two-for-one sale on Bogeys posters -- buy one, get one free -- just like fireworks on July 3 when they want to get rid of them! Yay! http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060922.html |
| OVERCOMPENSATING: Good Old Internet | Jeff: Cyberscape... al-qaeda... high-fructose corn syrup... / TH3 G0D 0F IN73RN375: JEFFREY, I7 I5 I, TH3 G0D 0F IN73RN375 I HAV3 BRAND N3W PH0705 0F LINDSAY L0HAN'S VAGINA F0R Y0U T0 GAZ3 UP0N / Jeff: Why can't the interwub just be informational and entertaining? Why does it got to be an experience of gut-wrenching horror and depravity? / TH3 G0D 0F IN73RN375: TH3 INTERNET IS AN UNCENS0RED REPRESENTATI0N 0F THE TRUE HUMAN C0NIDITI0N http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060923.html |
| Spoiler Alert | [[ Jeffrey wears a fancy purple and gold shirt; Weedmaster P a green sweater vest ]]
/ Jeffrey: Good news! I've learned with absolute certainty what happens to you after you die!
/ Weedmaster P: WE ALREADY KNOW WHAT HAPPENS 72 VIRGINS BLAH BLAH BLAH / [[ Baby wears a flower-print dress and talks to Jeffrey ]]
/ Baby: Jeffrey, nobody really wants t' know what happens after they die! It'd take all th' fun outta livin'!
/ Jeffrey: Dang! I didin't think about that! / [[ Jeffrey, sitting shirtless in a chair, pinching at his belly and holding a glass. Joanna is lying down on a piece of wood furniture ]]
/ Jeffrey: Oh, Joanna! What do you do with an answer to a question nobody really wants to know?
/ Joanna: Quidquid Latine dictum sit altum viditur
/ Jeffrey: Man, I'm gettin' fat. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060924.html |
| OVERCOMPENSATING: Baby Versus The Pipettes | Baby: There. Now I'm ready. / Baby: Jeffrey, I've decided to become a Pipette.
/ Jeff: You want to be a small, glass tube?
/ Baby: No, the band! I'm gonna run away an' join the Pipettes!
/ Jeff: Woah woah woah / Jeff: What, are The Pipettes like the carnival or the Army or something?
/ Baby: I've got what is takes. I'm pretty and I got a polka-dot dress. / Narration: LATER...
/ Weedmaster P: MAYBE IF YOU GOT A NEW CHARACTER YOUR COMICS WOULDN'T SUCK SO MUCH
/ Jeff: Maybe. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060925.html |
| Tallahassee Econolodge | Narrator: PEARLY GATES TRAILER PARK
/ Unknown: If you quit I ain't givin' you a good reference ho
/ Tallahassee: I ain't comin' back! Only sissy gangster wannabes use 9mm Glocks! / YHWH: What's all that commotion out there? Go see what that commotion is, boy.
/ Jesus: You probably did something to enrage the muslims again. / Tallahassee: Oh, Winston, what are we to do? Without a job we'll have no money and with no money we'll starve outside!
/ Jesus: What is the matter, sweet child o' mine?
/ Tallahassee: *sniff* I lost my job J.C. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060926.html |
| The Specialist | Tallahassee: I'll never be able to find another job. I'm a trash person! I'm pure trash.
/ J.C.: That's nonsense! Let me ask you a question. Have you ever heard of a man named Jeffrey Rowland? / Tallahassee: The "Snakes on a Plane" guy?
/ J.C.: Yes but he's also a talented cartoonist and his company needs a new specialist!
/ Tallahassee: Specialist?
/ J.C.: Tell me about your skills. Tallahassee Econolodge. / Tallahassee: I... I'm the heiress to the Econolodge Motel Fortune.
/ J.C.: That's perfect! I'll "put in a good word for you." / J.C.: MWOO HA HA HA HA http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060927.html |
| Applications | Weedmaster P: I GOT ANOTHER BOX OF FILLED-OUT JOB APPLICATIONS MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T'A RUN THE AD IN THE VALLEY ADVOCATE
/ Jeffrey Rowland: Nobody who reads The Advocate has jobs! Updating your Myspace is not a job. / [[Weedmaster P is about to step on a banana peel]] / [[Weedmaster P slips and falls scattering the applications into the air. As he is falling, his cigarette flies out of his mouth and catches the applications on fire]] / Weedmaster P: WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE
/ Jeffrey Rowland: I'll get the... fire-putter-outter! / Narrator: LATER...
/ Jeffrey Rowland: Only one application survived the blaze... Tallahassee Econolodge.
/ Weedmaster P: THE LORD WORKS IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS
/ Jeffrey Rowland: Huh?
/ Weedmaster P: I DON'T KNOW. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060928.html |
| The TopatoCo Standardized Interview | Jeffrey Rowland: Good morning, Tallahassee Econolodge. Thank you for coming to your job interview here at Topatoco. Tell me a little about yourself.
/ Tallahassee Econolodge: I'm heiress to the Econolodge motel fortune.
/ Jeffrey Rowland: I see. / Jeffrey Rowland: Very interesting. Now tell me, do you feel like you have any weaknesses?
/ Tallahassee Econolodge: Sometimes when I drink too much I black out and throw up. / Jeffrey Rowland: Very good. Now can you describe the most tragic thing you can think of. / Tallahassee Econolodge: Terry Shiavo is flying the Hindenburg which has the space shuttle Challenger and the Titanic stuck to it and it crashes into the World Trade Center, which is full of dolphins. Also nearby there is an Eagle watching, and he begins to weep.
/ Jeffrey Rowland: You're hired. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20060929.html |
| I'M ON UR TEE SHIRT | Hamsterdance Cosplay Jesus Trolls Zombies Hentai /B/tard LARPing Spyware Bukkake Slashfic Leeroy Jenkins Yiffing http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061001.html |
| OVERCOMPENSATING: The New iTem. All you need. And more | Incomplete. Partial.
/ Unfinished
/ Part of something else.
/ Missing something. / A phrase or clause that is punctuated and capitalized as a sentence but does not constitute a complete grammatical sentence. / The iSentence Fragment.
/ Almost but not quite. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061002.html |
| Winterview With A Spitfire | INTERVIEW WITH AN 11-YEAR OLD
/ Winter McCloud: Tell me, Jeffrey Rowland, what were your childhood hobbies?
/ Jeffrey Rowland: (Thinking) Hmm... / [[Jeffrey Rowland recalls guns, knives, alcohol, vomitting and being punched in the face]] / Jeffrey Rowland: Horseback riding. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061003.html |
| Sticky | Jeff: Weedmaster P, this is our newest employee, Tallahassee Econolodge!
/ Tallahassee: The Weedmaster P?!
/ Weedmaster P: WHAT THE FUCK IS ALL THIS STICKY SHIT ALL OVER EVERYTHING / Tallahassee: Everything in this whole office is sticky!
/ Jeff: Why in the hell is everything all sticky?
/ < http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061004.html |
| The District Sleeps Around | [[Jeffrey and Weedmaster P driving a bus]]
/ Weedmaster P: DRIVE OVER TO THE WHORE DISTRICT JEFFREY
/ Jeffrey: We're not going to the whore district! We have to go to the thread district to get thread. / [[Outside view of the bus. A TOPATOCO banner is on the side]]
/ Weedmaster P: I LIKE HOW WE ARE SUDDENLY IN THE WHORE DISTRICT
/ Jeffrey: I got off on the wrong exit! We're not stopping 'cause we're working. / Jeffery: Is that...Baby? / [[Baby sitting on the side of the road bare foot]] / [[Closeup of Baby, pimply and missing teeth]] http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061005.html |
| The Prescription Tiara | Jeff: What happened to you out there, Baby?
/ Baby: Don't ask me t' talk about it, Jeffrey... it's too painful.
/ Jeff: Well the important thing is you're back. / Baby: Who's that whore doing my job? And how come she gets to wear a tiara an' I never got to wear a tiara? / Jeff: That's Tallahassee Econolodge. I hired her 'cause I figured you were permanently gone. Also her tiara is prescription I think.
/ Baby: Bollocks. / Weedmaster P: JEFFREY YOU HAVE TO SIGN THIS FORM THAT SAYS BABY WAS A TERRIBLE WORKER http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061006.html |
| OVERCOMPENSATING: Monotheocrazy | Narration: 11:59 a.m.
/ Jeff: Emergency meeting! / Jeff: There's no easy way to say this, so I made a Power Point. Does anyone have any ideas of what to do about this?
/ Power Point Presentation: HOLY CRAP
/ We're all gonna die
/ What the hell are w
/ Oh my God
/ Oh My God
/ What are w
/ gonna do / Weedmaster P: I SUGGEST WE ESTABLISH A POWERFUL, HYPOCRITICAL MONOTHEOCRACY THAT CLAIMS TO SUPPORT RELIGIOUS FREEDOM WHILE OPENLY OPPRESSING ALL NON-BELIEVERS / Jeff: But can we use that model to someday prevent our citizens from questioning whatever the ruling class does, despite their motives? http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061008.html |
| Stalking. Simplified. | [[The La1R of the G0d of internet]] / G0d of internet: 4T L45T TH3 MY5P4C3 IN5TANT M355AG3 CL13NT 15 R3ADY. G0 F0RTH, 5P3LL_CH3CK_G0BL1N 4ND T34CH TH3M TH3 WAY5 OF G00D3R 5P3LL1NG!
/ 5PELL_CH3CK_G0BL1N: oh dear. / < http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061009.html |
| OVERCOMPENSATING: Mad Revenues | Tallahassee: I found a dollar right by the dumpster!
/ Baby: Why don'tcha use it to buy a new tiara that's exactly like th' one yer wearin'? / Weedmaster P: JEFFREY I THINK BABY IS GONNA MUDER OL' TALLAHASSEE OR VICE VERSA OR I WILL KILL THEM
/ Jeff: I don't know how I'm gonna pay everybody! It turns out "Snakes on a Plane" shirts were like 95% of our revenue.
/ The Poopmonster: Diarrhea babies. / Weedmaster P: SCREW IT MAN LET'S GO GET A GALLON OF TEQUILA AND A HUNDRED SCRATCH TICKETS AND SIT ON THE PORCH AND SCARE LITTLE KIDS
/ Jeff: Sounds like a plan. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061011.html |
| CrazySexyHorny | Jeff: About 90% of what we do is controlled by subconscious things like hormones and glands!
/ Weedmaster P: There are only two main feelings - scared and horny / Jeff: But how can that be? What of the simple joy of a birthday cake?
/ Weedmaster P: It is actually a combination of Lack of fear and a full belly means you're more likely to live long enough to screw again
/ Jeff: I...see. / Jeff: What about something that is both scary AND sexy?
/ Weedmaster P: I don't know man that doesn't seem possible or necessary
/ Jeff: What if I can't help it? / {{Vampires are sexy AND scary}} http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061012.html |
| I Am Going Here | [[Advertisement]] / Friday the 13th of October 2006 / Psycho ZLIKS
/ BY ANDREW BELL / DEAD ZEBRA INC edition launch party
/ Join us for toys, art, drinks, and more
/ 9pm - 12 / Upstairs @ MadameX
/ 94 West Houston, NYC / madamex.com http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061013.html |
| OVERCOMPENSATING: My Big Announcement | Jeff: Are they ready, Weedmaster P? Is America ready for my big announcement?
/ Weedmaster P: YEAH BUT I THINK YOU SHOULD SLIDE ONTO THE STAGE TO PROVE THAT YOU MEAN IT / Jeff: My name is, uh, Kerry Edwards and I want to run for President the next time they have a vote to see who gets to be President. / Jeff: You should vote for me because I'm kind of poor and also I'm half Cherokee. I also don't think... I can't read this... / Jeff: Anyway I believe the word "womb" should rhyme with the word "bomb." And the word "food" should rhyme with "good." It should. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061014.html |
| Demoralized by an Angel | [[Friday, 9pm, NYC. Madame x in NYC Dr. Vampire's "Psycho Zliks" Launch party]] / Nerd vampire: Jeffery, you and Tallahasse may visit my lair later if you promise to help me transport two boxes.
/ Jeff: OK let's just have ten more drinks. / [[Possibly Two a.m.]]
/ Nerd vampire: It is possible we will require two separate vehicles to accomplish this task. / Jeff: Or maybe a stretch limo will suddenly show up!
/ Limo driver: Yo, do you and those boxes need a ride? / Redhead: A real live stretch limo!
/ Jeff: How much to Brooklyn? / Limo driver: um, eighty bucks. / Jeff: Thirty
/ Limo driver: Fifty
/ Jeff: Forty
/ Limo driver: Fifty
/ Jeff: OK. / Limo driver: You can't put those boxes in the trunk because I have two bodies in there.
/ Jeff: OK. / Limo driver: I am utterly contemptuous of females. I am openly promiscuous. / Limo driver: I also recently stopped smoking crack. / Redhead: This limo is filthy. Are limos supposed to be filthy?
/ Jeff: Nope. This here limo ride is wicked sketchy. / Limo driver: Y'all wanna buy a Pimp Glass? Only ten dollars. Somethin' like this oughta cost at least $20 dollars. / Jeff: I will pay eight dollars for that and not one penny more. / Limo driver: You just bought yourself a pimp glass. You will not regret it. / {{I told you I'd wear the Pipettes dress, Jeffrey; just please shut off the pimp glass.}} http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061015.html |
| Hypocrititis | Jeff: Alcoholism is a disease!
/ Redhead: How do you get it?
/ Weedmaster P: By drinking too fucking much / Jeff: That's not a disease...that's lack of self control!
/ Weedmaster P: Poor muscle is a disease now too nobody asked to be born / Jeff: What about people that get actual diseases like AIDS?
/ Weedmaster P: It is their punishment for making God angry / {{Or maybe i was just kidding about that!}} http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061016.html |
Archive Page:
<< 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40
41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 >>