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Driving Miss Dongle Part One [[ Topato Potato and Sheriff Pony are crawling in a super-heated landscape ]] / Narrator: BUTTER DIMENSION 360 DEGREES / Topato Potato: Death draws near, Sheriff Pony. Earthlings have all but forgotten about us and soon we will face our judgement. Is your soul prepared? / Sheriff Pony: I am far from...
Driving Miss Dongle Part Two Topato Potato: Princess, with all due respect, operating a motorcar under the influence of intoxihol is a disgustingly shameful and degenerate offense. / Princess Dongle: I am swollen with regret, Topato. / [[ Sheriff Pony appears to be using a telephone headset ]] / Princess Dongle: My only hope is...
Driving Miss Dongle Part Three [[ Topato Potato is lying down ]] / Princess Dongle: Arise, Topato! The time has come for me to utilize your chauffeur services! / Topato Potato: I... I was not aware you were serious about that / [[ Topato Potato wears a chauffeur's uniform, while Princess Dongle holds a martini glass of pink liquid...
Driving Miss Dongle Part Four [[ Exterior of the Princess' flying black vehicle ]] / Princess Dongle: Topato, are you trying to give me motion sickness? / Topato Potato: Apologies, my liege! I am unfamiliar with the handling characteristics of this cumbersome vessel! / [[ The flight deck; Topato is at the controls as the Princess'...
Driving Miss Dongle Part Five [[ The robot driver of a green-stained trucker ship yells out the window ]] / Trucker: Death to the monarchy! Eviscerate the aristocrats! / [[ Topato, yelling from Princess Dongle's black ship ]] / Topato Potato: The ignorant whore that birthed you is as corpulent as a low-income American Earth-child! / [[...
 
New Shirts Look Totally Great [[A picture of an orange ROCKTOBER shirt and a black Cowboy Killers hoodie.]] / {{alt text: Brunetto does great work!}}
Driving Miss Dongle Part Six [[ Topato, floating, talking on the phone and holding the severed head of a robot trucker. A robot arm floats nearby. ]] / Topato Potato: Sheriff Pony, the Princess' limousine is careening toward the ground. / Topato Potato: Request assistance, please / [[ Sheriff Pony, wearing a stained wifebeater,...
Driving Miss Dongle Part Seven [[ Topato wearing judges robes and a wig, holding a gavel , behind a desk that reads (in part): JUSTICE - FUN. The desk also appears to have a large red button on its top surface. ]] / Topato Potato: Topato Potato, you stand before this court charged with failing to protect the Princess from harm....
Missile Crisis Free To Look At THE CASE OF THE MISSILE CRISIS / Is finally available for free viewing (minus the extras of course)! To celebrate we are having a permanent two-for-one sale on Bogeys posters -- buy one, get one free -- just like fireworks on July 3 when they want to get rid of them! Yay!
OVERCOMPENSATING: Good Old Internet Jeff: Cyberscape... al-qaeda... high-fructose corn syrup... / TH3 G0D 0F IN73RN375: JEFFREY, I7 I5 I, TH3 G0D 0F IN73RN375 I HAV3 BRAND N3W PH0705 0F LINDSAY L0HAN'S VAGINA F0R Y0U T0 GAZ3 UP0N / Jeff: Why can't the interwub just be informational and entertaining? Why does it got to be an experience...
 
Spoiler Alert [[ Jeffrey wears a fancy purple and gold shirt; Weedmaster P a green sweater vest ]] / Jeffrey: Good news! I've learned with absolute certainty what happens to you after you die! / Weedmaster P: WE ALREADY KNOW WHAT HAPPENS 72 VIRGINS BLAH BLAH BLAH / [[ Baby wears a flower-print dress and talks to...
OVERCOMPENSATING: Baby Versus The Pipettes Baby: There. Now I'm ready. / Baby: Jeffrey, I've decided to become a Pipette. / Jeff: You want to be a small, glass tube? / Baby: No, the band! I'm gonna run away an' join the Pipettes! / Jeff: Woah woah woah / Jeff: What, are The Pipettes like the carnival or the Army or something? / Baby: I've got what...
Tallahassee Econolodge Narrator: PEARLY GATES TRAILER PARK / Unknown: If you quit I ain't givin' you a good reference ho / Tallahassee: I ain't comin' back! Only sissy gangster wannabes use 9mm Glocks! / YHWH: What's all that commotion out there? Go see what that commotion is, boy. / Jesus: You probably did something to enrage...
The Specialist Tallahassee: I'll never be able to find another job. I'm a trash person! I'm pure trash. / J.C.: That's nonsense! Let me ask you a question. Have you ever heard of a man named Jeffrey Rowland? / Tallahassee: The "Snakes on a Plane" guy? / J.C.: Yes but he's also a talented cartoonist and his company...
Applications Weedmaster P: I GOT ANOTHER BOX OF FILLED-OUT JOB APPLICATIONS MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T'A RUN THE AD IN THE VALLEY ADVOCATE / Jeffrey Rowland: Nobody who reads The Advocate has jobs! Updating your Myspace is not a job. / [[Weedmaster P is about to step on a banana peel]] / [[Weedmaster P slips and falls...
 
The TopatoCo Standardized Interview Jeffrey Rowland: Good morning, Tallahassee Econolodge. Thank you for coming to your job interview here at Topatoco. Tell me a little about yourself. / Tallahassee Econolodge: I'm heiress to the Econolodge motel fortune. / Jeffrey Rowland: I see. / Jeffrey Rowland: Very interesting. Now tell me, do you...
I'M ON UR TEE SHIRT Hamsterdance Cosplay Jesus Trolls Zombies Hentai /B/tard LARPing Spyware Bukkake Slashfic Leeroy Jenkins Yiffing Hasselhoff RIAA Tubes Bonsai Kitten Engrish Scat Ninjas Pokemons Nevar Forget Mr. Hands NSFW Hardcore Mr. T O RLY Memes Coprophagy Bug Chasing alt.sex Interweb beta Tubgirl C1AL1S Nigeria...
OVERCOMPENSATING: The New iTem. All you need. And more Incomplete. Partial. / Unfinished / Part of something else. / Missing something. / A phrase or clause that is punctuated and capitalized as a sentence but does not constitute a complete grammatical sentence. / The iSentence Fragment. / Almost but not quite.
Winterview With A Spitfire INTERVIEW WITH AN 11-YEAR OLD / Winter McCloud: Tell me, Jeffrey Rowland, what were your childhood hobbies? / Jeffrey Rowland: (Thinking) Hmm... / [[Jeffrey Rowland recalls guns, knives, alcohol, vomitting and being punched in the face]] / Jeffrey Rowland: Horseback riding.
Sticky Jeff: Weedmaster P, this is our newest employee, Tallahassee Econolodge! / Tallahassee: The Weedmaster P?! / Weedmaster P: WHAT THE FUCK IS ALL THIS STICKY SHIT ALL OVER EVERYTHING / Tallahassee: Everything in this whole office is sticky! / Jeff: Why in the hell is everything all sticky? / <> / Jeff:...
 
The District Sleeps Around [[Jeffrey and Weedmaster P driving a bus]] / Weedmaster P: DRIVE OVER TO THE WHORE DISTRICT JEFFREY / Jeffrey: We're not going to the whore district! We have to go to the thread district to get thread. / [[Outside view of the bus. A TOPATOCO banner is on the side]] / Weedmaster P: I LIKE HOW WE ARE SUDDENLY...
The Prescription Tiara Jeff: What happened to you out there, Baby? / Baby: Don't ask me t' talk about it, Jeffrey... it's too painful. / Jeff: Well the important thing is you're back. / Baby: Who's that whore doing my job? And how come she gets to wear a tiara an' I never got to wear a tiara? / Jeff: That's Tallahassee Econolodge....
OVERCOMPENSATING: Monotheocrazy Narration: 11:59 a.m. / Jeff: Emergency meeting! / Jeff: There's no easy way to say this, so I made a Power Point. Does anyone have any ideas of what to do about this? / Power Point Presentation: HOLY CRAP / We're all gonna die / What the hell are w / Oh my God / Oh My God / What are w / gonna do / Weedmaster...
Stalking. Simplified. [[The La1R of the G0d of internet]] / G0d of internet: 4T L45T TH3 MY5P4C3 IN5TANT M355AG3 CL13NT 15 R3ADY. G0 F0RTH, 5P3LL_CH3CK_G0BL1N 4ND T34CH TH3M TH3 WAY5 OF G00D3R 5P3LL1NG! / 5PELL_CH3CK_G0BL1N: oh dear. / <http://overcompensating.com/posts/20061009.html
OVERCOMPENSATING: Mad Revenues Tallahassee: I found a dollar right by the dumpster! / Baby: Why don'tcha use it to buy a new tiara that's exactly like th' one yer wearin'? / Weedmaster P: JEFFREY I THINK BABY IS GONNA MUDER OL' TALLAHASSEE OR VICE VERSA OR I WILL KILL THEM / Jeff: I don't know how I'm gonna pay everybody! It turns...
 
CrazySexyHorny Jeff: About 90% of what we do is controlled by subconscious things like hormones and glands! / Weedmaster P: There are only two main feelings - scared and horny / Jeff: But how can that be? What of the simple joy of a birthday cake? / Weedmaster P: It is actually a combination of Lack of fear and a...
I Am Going Here [[Advertisement]] / Friday the 13th of October 2006 / Psycho ZLIKS / BY ANDREW BELL / DEAD ZEBRA INC edition launch party / Join us for toys, art, drinks, and more / 9pm - 12 / Upstairs @ MadameX / 94 West Houston, NYC / madamex.com
OVERCOMPENSATING: My Big Announcement Jeff: Are they ready, Weedmaster P? Is America ready for my big announcement? / Weedmaster P: YEAH BUT I THINK YOU SHOULD SLIDE ONTO THE STAGE TO PROVE THAT YOU MEAN IT / Jeff: My name is, uh, Kerry Edwards and I want to run for President the next time they have a vote to see who gets to be President. / Jeff:...
Demoralized by an Angel [[Friday, 9pm, NYC. Madame x in NYC Dr. Vampire's "Psycho Zliks" Launch party]] / Nerd vampire: Jeffery, you and Tallahasse may visit my lair later if you promise to help me transport two boxes. / Jeff: OK let's just have ten more drinks. / [[Possibly Two a.m.]] / Nerd vampire: It is possible we will...
Hypocrititis Jeff: Alcoholism is a disease! / Redhead: How do you get it? / Weedmaster P: By drinking too fucking much / Jeff: That's not a disease...that's lack of self control! / Weedmaster P: Poor muscle is a disease now too nobody asked to be born / Jeff: What about people that get actual diseases like AIDS? / Weedmaster...
 

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