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| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 21 / 2002 | [["Nightline" studios]] / SHELDON: I can't believe I'm here in the "Nightline" studios, about to be interviewed by Ted Koppel!! / Man (Generic): Uh, actually sir, Mr. Koppel is on vacation again. Filling in for him tonight will be, uh... our janitor. / / [["Nightline" studios]] / SHELDON: MAN, Ted has just given up on doing the show... / janitor: What's the best mop you ever used? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021121.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 22 / 2002 | [[T.V. Station]] / ARTHUR: You're nervous? / SHELDON: You're darn right I'm nervous! I'm about to be interviewed by Ted Koppel! / / [[T.V. Station]] / SHELDON: He can reduce world leaders to tears..! My only hope is that Ted takes pity on a cute 10-year old and gives me creampuff questions / / [[T.V. Station]] / Ted Koppel: By what right does a boy in short pants run a $80 billion dollar company? / SHELDON: uh, could we talk about how cute I am? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021122.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 23 / 2002 | [[Bathroom]] / / [[Bathroom]] / / [[Bathroom]] / SHELDON: ...Oh yeah Koppel?? Well you're a total FAT HEAD... So there!! / / [[Bathroom]] / ARTHUR: You reeeally gotta put that "Nightline" interview behind you. / SHELDON: ...Why do my best come-backs show up when I'm in the tub? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021123.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 25 / 2002 | [[Park]] / DANTE: Saw your big interview on "Nightline" last night. / / [[Park]] / DANTE: Noticed you were a bit nervous. / / [[Park]] / DANTE: Noticed you had had tacos for lunch. / SHELDON: Let us speak no more of this. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021125.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 26 / 2002 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: Folks ask what my "Thanks" are on this special day... / And I just have to laugh in a well-knowing way. / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: 'Cause my thanks are so simple, they're almost absurd. / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: I'm happy I'm not this big ol' cooked bird. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021126.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 27 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: It's a little disturbing to see you eating Thanksgiving turkey. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: You're a bird! Eating another bird! A genetic cousin! / ARTHUR: Oh don't be such a hypocrite. Humans eat apes. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: We do NOT eat apes! / ARTHUR: Oh yeah? What about "McDonald's"? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: THAT'S BEEF!! / ARTHUR: Suuuure it is... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021127.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 28 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: This year I'm thankful to be sharing this lovely meal with family. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: And I'm thankful that Sheldon's experiment gave me the power of speech. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: And I'm thankful that my net worth is equal to the yearly income of France. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Yes. Well. ...Pass the stuffing. / ARTHUR: Lord! You're up to FRANCE now?! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021128.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 29 / 2002 | [[Living Room]] / ARTHUR: Remember yesterday when you said your income was larger than France's? Well I looked it up, mister smarty-pants. You don't make HALF what France makes. / / [[Living Room]] / ARTHUR: In fact, you're just below the Falkland Islands. / / [[Living Room]] / / [[Living Room]] / ARTHUR: ...Apparently their major export is bat guano. / SHELDON: Yeah, yeah... You made your point. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021129.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 30 / 2002 | [[The Mall]] / ARTHUR: I thought you said the mall would have it up. / SHELDON: Give it a sec... / / [[The Mall]] / / [[The Mall]] / (SOUND FX): WOOSH WAP BAP. / / [[The Mall]] / SHELDON: Exactly two minutes after Thanksgiving!! / ARTHUR: Why yes, I've been a good duck. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021130.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 02 / 2002 | ARTHUR: HA! / / ARTHUR: WHOO! / / ARTHUR: hee Hee HEE / / ARTHUR: ha-ha! / / ARTHUR: HOO! / / ARTHUR: Bwaa-ha-ha! / / GRAMP: Have you ever noticed how, in American culture, wearing any hat other than a baseball cap invites ridicule? / ARTHUR: Whatever, Pierre. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021202.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 03 / 2002 | SHELDON: Did you hear?? Somebody invented a holographic keyboard! / DANTE: A what? / / SHELDON: A keyboard! Made of projected light! And... And a laser tracks where your fingers "type"! It's so... It's... / / SHELDON: ERRRRRR.... / / SHELDON: He's gone into a nerd coma. / GRAMP: That does it! I am cancelling your subsciption to "Wired" magazine, young man! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021203.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 04 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Gramp - what's the difference between a simile and a metaphor? / GRAMP: A simile is a... uh, Russian flower, and a metaphor is that stage in a frog's life between "tadpole" and "adult". / / [[THE HOUSE]] / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: When all else fails as a grandfather, make it up. / ARTHUR: HEY HEY HEY... do metaphor frogs taste better than normal frogs? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021204.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 05 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE (living room)]] / TV Announcer: Tonight, on ACTION TEAM COVERAGE: Sixteen shocking ways your shoes could be killing you!
/ Killer squirrels… Are they in your neighborhood?!
/ One local fast-food chain is poisoning your family! Find out which one… after the break!! / / [[THE HOUSE (living room)]] / SHELDON: WHAT THE..? / ARTHUR: FOR THE LOVE OF STEVE! / GRAMP: Who votes we never watch local news again? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021205.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 06 / 2002 | GRAMP: Listen to this: "A noted criminologist believes there may be a relationship between the drop in the economy and the rise in crime." / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / GRAMP: Imagine that! What a genius! Get that man a study grant right away! / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: ...His 401.K down again? / ARTHUR: ...But sarcasm's up 10%. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021206.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 07 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: You're eating Choco-Fudgies?? Do you know what's in those? / GRAMP: I don't wanna hear it. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Look, LOOK! "36 grams of fat! 12 grams of sodium!" / GRAMP: I don't wanna hear! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: And "12 grams of a mysterious sludge we found behind our cousin's house." / GRAMP: ... / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: I SAID I DIDN'T WANNA HEAR!! / SHELDON: ...their "cousins' house"? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021207.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 09 / 2002 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: Remember how you were saying that Christmas is getting too commercial, and losing that warm, personal touch? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: Well this ain't helping. / Santa's helper: Wave to Santa as you pass, children. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021209.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 10 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: I am the new, the now, ... the hip, the wow. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: The cutting edge, the hot new thing -- my fashions soar and roar and sing! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: I'm a fashion force, the "must-have buy" -- for cool new trends, then I'm your guy! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: You're a duck wearing little pants. / ARTHUR: ... that attitude, in contrast, is so YESTERDAY. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021210.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 11 / 2002 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / GRAMP: It's weird seeing you with clothes on... It reminds me why I never liked "Donald Duck". / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: The little sailor shirt... AND LACK OF PANTS? / GRAMP: Something morally wrong there... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021211.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 12 / 2002 | SHELDON: Where'd you find those little pants, anyway? / ARTHUR: I got them off Dante's "Mr. Tinkles" doll. / / SHELDON: Dante has a MR. TINKLES doll? / DANTE: NO I DO NOT!! / ARTHUR: ...Then where'd I get these pants? / / DANTE: I... Uh... No, no... Uh... It's... / SHELDON: DANTE HAS A MR. TINKLES DOLL! / ARTHUR: And do I really wanna be wearing pants from a doll named Mr. Tinkles? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021212.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 13 / 2002 | DANTE: Whether or not I own a "Mr. Tinkles" doll is irrelevant.
/ You guys are missing the bigger picture. / / / SHELDON: SUCH AS... ? / DANTE: Such as, Mr. Tinkles wants his pants back, ALL RIGHT? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021213.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 14 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / GRAMP: You know the old line "like water off a duck's back"...? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Well, the same can not be said for maple syrup... / / [[THE HOUSE (Kitchen)]] / GRAMP: SOMEONE isn't too handy with the squeeze bottle. / ARTHUR: My kingdom for some solvent! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021214.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 16 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / [[Living Room]] / DANTE: I can hardly wait, I'm so excited! The whole thing is so enchanted! / SHELDON: TOTALLY... with that bearded, magical fellow... and all those elves... / GRAMP: It's cute to see them get so excited about Christmas! / ARTHUR: They're talking about "The Lord of the Rings." http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021216.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 17 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / NARRATOR: The 1st employee holiday card from the C.E.O.'s desk... / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / NARRATOR: The 316th employee holiday card... / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / NARRATOR: The 709th employee holiday card... / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Today I'm announcing massive corporate layoffs... / ARTHUR: Oh come on... There's only 2348 more to go... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021217.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 18 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Bought a new company today. / ARTHUR: Really? Another software company? / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Nope. "UNITED COAL." 2.3 billion dollars. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: ...Hung your stocking yet? / ARTHUR: OH NO YOU DON'T. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021218.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 19 / 2002 | [[Living Room]] / SHELDON: He escaped from my nativity scene somehow. / ARTHUR: You have WAAAY to much money. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021219.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 20 / 2002 | [[Living Room]] / ARTHUR: It's supposed to be a dove of peace. You hear me...? A DOVE of peace... / / [[Living Room]] / SHELDON: Look, when an ornament breaks, we just gotta make do. / / [[Living Room]] / ARTHUR: But I look nothing like a dove of peace. / SHELDON: So work it - pose a little. / DANTE: Yeah! "Duck the halls." http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021220.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 21 / 2002 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: Gramp, could we maybe buy a NEW angel ornament this year? / GRAMP: What?! No! Your Great Aunt Tessa made this! / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: But it's moldy and falling apart. / GRAMP: This angel represents the strength and continuity of our family! / (SOUND FX): POP! / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: Oooo... That ain't a good sign. / GRAMP: - AAA! Quick! Help me catch that head! / (SOUND FX): Roll roll... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021221.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 23 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: There are three types of Christmas Shopping: 1. Done the day after Thanksgiving. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: 2. Done a week before Christmas. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: 3. So desperately last minute, it's almost ridiculous. / GRAMP: Here! I got you the "Nads" hair removal system from that Infomercial! / ARTHUR: But... but I don't have HAIR... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021223.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 24 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Remember that scene in "Spiderman" where they say "with great power comes great responsibility"? / ARTHUR: Yeah. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: ...It got me thinking. With all my billions, I should do something nice for my employees at Christmas. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: So I bought each of 'em a house. / ARTHUR: Ah, the timeless wisdom of Spiderman. Is there anything it CAN'T teach us? / GRAMP: JEEZ-LOUISE! ...CAN I COME WORK FOR YOU?!? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021224.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 25 / 2002 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: You want me to buy you a house for Christmas, Gramp? / GRAMP: Oh, heck no. I paid off the mortgage on this place ages ago. / / GRAMP: Besides, Christmas isn't about buying big ol' expensive gifts for the people you love... / / GRAMP: It's realizing the people you love are big ol' expensive gifts. / SHELDON: Oh. / (SOUND FX): HUG. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/021225.html |
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