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Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 06 / 2009 [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: It starts innocently enough / GRAMP: Hey Oso! Wanna go walkies?? / OSO: HYPE! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: So you enjoy the moment / GRAMP: WALKIES! Walkies walkies walkies / OSO: hype hype hype / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: And then...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 07 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE (Bathroom)]] / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: Sometimes, when I look in the mirror, I don't think that's my reflection looking back at me. I think it's an alternate-universe Arthur looking back at me. / / [[THE HOUSE (Bathroom)]] / Mirror: / ARTHUR: And when I walk away from the mirror to eat my breakfast......
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 08 / 2009 [[Outdoors (pouring rain)]] / ARTHUR: Raaain, rain, go away: come again some other day. / / [[Outdoors (pouring rain)]] / ARTHUR: A-HEM. / ARTHUR: Raaain, rain, go away: come again some other day. / / [[Outdoors (pouring rain)]] / ARTHUR: Don't you MAKE me sing that again in a Bjork voice. ...'cause I'll do it. / / [[Outdoors...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 09 / 2009 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Summer is almost upon us, Flaco! Nuthin' about summer not to like. / FLACO: / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Except, of course, having to see dudes in sandals. BUH. Ain't nobody wantin' to see dudes' bare feet. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic:...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 10 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE (Living room)]] / Chair: / GRAMP: It's a tough call. I actually love that super-cheap shampoo I use. It works great. / ARTHUR: / / GRAMP: But I've fallen in love with the pump bottle on that expensive shampoo I bought by accident. If I go back to the cheap stuff, I'll miss the cool pump. / ARTHUR:...
 
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 11 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE (Living room)]] / Chair: / Magazine: / ARTHUR: Hey, waaait a minute. It just occurred to me: why are YOU using shampoo? / GRAMP: Because. After 65 years on this earth, and a long and fruitful life... / / GRAMP: I've developed a bit of a scalp condition that I can't seem to shake. / ARTHUR: / / GRAMP:...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 12 / 2009 [[Park]] / SHELDON: / DANTE: / Girl: / ARTHUR: [to Flaco] Lookit these kids runnin' around like chumps in the Easter egg hunt... workin' up a sweat in their Easter finest. / FLACO: / / ARTHUR: Well, this year you and I are gonna win this egg hunt... but we ain't runnin'. I got a plan. / FLACO: / / ARTHUR: hey,...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 13 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE (the front doorway)]] / GRAMP: [kicks off right shoe...] KLONK [...and wrestles with knotted tie] / / GRAMP: [peels off tie...] FWIP! [...and kicks off left shoe] / / GRAMP: [rips open shirt and suit jacket] FOOMP! / / GRAMP: [rustle rustle rustle] / / [[THE HOUSE (Living room)]] / Chair: / electric fan:...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 14 / 2009 [[Middle Earth (Alpine forest, Autumn)]] / Microphone: / Tree: Fir: / NARRATOR: They say timing is everything in humor / Ent: / / [[Middle Earth (Alpine forest, Winter)]] / Microphone: / Tree: Fir: / Ent: / / [[Middle Earth (Alpine forest, Spring)]] / Microphone: / Tree: Fir: / Ent: / / [[Middle Earth (Alpine forest,...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 15 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE (by a door)]] / Box: / GRAMP: Was that you makin' race car sounds? / ARTHUR: No. / / GRAMP: There's no one else at home. It must've been you. / ARTHUR: nope. just... sittin'. / / GRAMP: ...in a shoe box. / ARTHUR: in a box, yes. ...possibly shoe. / / GRAMP: ...makin' race car noises. / ARTHUR: Dang, man....
 
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 16 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / Computer: / GRAMP: [singsong] Sheldonnnnn? My computer's acting up. / / SHELDON: What's it doing? / / [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / Book: / GRAMP: The thing. The thing with the blinky and the red flashy. / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: The blinky and the red flashy? / / [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / ...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 17 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE]] / Computer: / GRAMP: Why isn't this mail-merge working on my computer? / SHELDON: / There's a slight field-mismatch between the original database and-- No... You know what? It's like this: / / SHELDON: ...all the programs on your computer are at a cocktail party. And as the shrimp is comin' around,...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 18 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: New rule for tech support: if someone asks you for help with THEIR computer, they gotta bring it to YOU. No more "Hey can you c'mere for a second" stuff. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Laptop: / SHELDON: Think about it: if folks have to physically stand up and walk to the room you're in... BAM....
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 19 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE (Kitchen)]] / ARTHUR: It took us 23 failed attempts. But now... we've got it down. / SHELDON: / / Bowl: / ARTHUR: First, we figured out it has to be a HEAVY-DUTY salad bowl. ...Can't be a lightweight. / / Cans: / ARTHUR: And you gotta use a TON of non-stick cooking spray on the bowl. A TON. / / refrigerator:...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 20 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE]] / Chair: / ARTHUR: Why do bagels and doughnuts and stuff have holes in them? / / GRAMP: The hole ensures that the dough cooks evenly throughout. / / ARTHUR: Wow! Really?? How did you know that? / / GRAMP: The path of EVERY life is a slow but steady gathering of facts. / / cup: / ARTHUR: ...And then...
 
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 21 / 2009 [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: What's up with Greek last names? They're all fantastically convoluted. / / SHELDON: I have a theory about that. / / SHELDON: Early Greek culture was one of the first flowerings of language as an artform, right? They designed philosophy and democracy and theater with this gorgeous playground...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 22 / 2009 [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: We thought yesterday was a loving jab at the inventiveness of Greek names. / / SHELDON: But we heard from a few peeved members of the Greek community, who said there were LOTS of Greek surnames that are short and to the point. / / ARTHUR: ...But they were all Greek...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 23 / 2009 [[THE POND]] / Ball: / ARTHUR: Thor is a Marvel superhero, right? / / SHELDON: Yep. / / ARTHUR: But Thor isn't an invented character like Wolverine. He was a god in the Norse belief system. How do they handle that? / / SHELDON: Mostly he just wails on dudes with his hammer. / / ARTHUR: So they pretty much sidestep...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 24 / 2009 [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: The ONLY REASON Thor works as a fictional superhero is because most readers aren't familiar with him as an historical Norse god. / SHELDON: / / ARTHUR: Had they put a well-known Roman or Greek god in superhero tights, it would be so much easier to spot how ridiculous the idea is... / / [[nonspecific...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 25 / 2009 [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: It just makes me uncomfortable: Marvel plundering real-world belief systems for superheroes like Thor. / / SHELDON: I suppose you're right. It's dangerous ground, mixing religion and superheroes. Sooner or later, you know they're gonna cross a line with some faith. / / [[nonspecific...
 
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 26 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE]] / telephone: / GRAMP: Hello? / Voice: / Hi! This is your bank! We're calling to let you know we're sending you a NEW credit card. / / GRAMP: No no no. I have a card. I don't want another one. / / Voice: It's not another one. It's a _replacement_. Your card info was stolen from our database... along...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 27 / 2009 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Art pad: / ARTHUR: Heeey, that's a great drawing, Dante. / DANTE: / Thanks! I'm trying to get better by copying the great masters. ...This is a 17th century crowd scene by Caravaggio. / / ARTHUR: Well it's good! You got the faces right. You got the perspective right....
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 28 / 2009 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Art pad: / ARTHUR: There's a futility in drawing, isn't there? In trying to express a 3-D world with a 2-D line? / DANTE: / / ARTHUR: It's an echo of an echo of an echo. It's like trying to capture the fullness of love in a song! Or faith in a poem! Or history...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 29 / 2009 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Art pad: / ARTHUR: I'm not denigrating art, but you gotta admit that art doesn't create. It copies. / DANTE: Wha...? / / ARTHUR: All art is basically a revision or recontextualization of the world around us. It COPIES the natural world. / / DANTE: WHAT?? No way. You...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 30 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE (Living room)]] / Television: / GRAMP: What is that nonsense? / / ARTHUR: This? This is "America's Next Top Model". Flaco loves this show. / FLACO: / / GRAMP: What's the concept? / ARTHUR: It's a bunch of girls being catty to each other, and DESPERATELY trying to win the affection of a slightly prettier...
 
Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 01 / 2009 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (field)]] / ARTHUR: No, it's true! There's a moment where flight can go wrong for a bird. / FLACO: / / ARTHUR: It's right at take off: if your wings don't create enough lift at JUST THE RIGHT MOMENT, it's a big ol' face plant. / FLACO: / / Bird: [sound effect] BAM. / ...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 02 / 2009 [[Outdoors]] / coffee: / GRAMP: / ARTHUR: God bless America! ...Are you tucking into another coffee? ANOTHER ONE?? / / ARTHUR: Dude, how many coffees have you HAD today? / GRAMP: Yes. / / GRAMP: / ARTHUR: / / GRAMP: "Yes" / ARTHUR: YES is not an answer!
Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 03 / 2009 [[nonspecific (white background) (no borders)]] / NARRATOR: Today: Useless advances in toothbrush technology! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Toothbrush: / NARRATOR: 1. Ol' Reliable / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Toothbrush: / NARRATOR: 2. The weird, oddly terrifying pointy thing added to the end. / NARRATOR:...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 04 / 2009 [[THE HOUSE]] / Chair: / ARTHUR: I am so proud of myself. This morning I polished off two "Pounder" bags of M&M's / GRAMP: / / ARTHUR: Within seconds, my heart was racing, I was sweating, my stomach was churning... / / ARTHUR: It was like I was runnin' a marathon: so much GLORY! ...So much vomiting, but so...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 05 / 2009 [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Dog treat: / Stool: / SHELDON: Sit. / OSO: / / Stool: / Dog treat: / SHELDON: SIT. / OSO: / / Stool: / Dog treat: / SHELDON: Sit SIT sit sit SIT sit sit SIT sit sit / OSO: / / Stool: / Dog treat: / SHELDON: SIT. / OSO: / / Dog treat: / Stool: / SHELDON: SIT * ...Aw dang it. / OSO: / / NARRATOR:...
 

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