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| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 05 / 2009 | [[Elevator]] / ARTHUR: / Phil: ...You're kidding me.
/ ...Now the elevator's stuck?? / (SOUND FX): KEROONK. / / [[Elevator]] / Phil: NO. No no no no
/ Not now. Not here. Not this way / / [[Elevator]] / ARTHUR: / Phil: OK, be cool, Phil. The duck is waaaaaay over on the other side of the elevator....He's not threatening... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090205.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 06 / 2009 | ARTHUR: Really? You have a phobia of ducks? / Man (Old): MAAAH! ... You speak!?? / / Man (Old): No...NO. It's my mind! Hallucinating out of fear!
/ ...It's so afraid of this duck, it's hallucinating a little voice for it. / ARTHUR: whoa whoa whoa
/ ... If it was just your mind hallucinating this ... / / Cardboard:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090206.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 07 / 2009 | [[Elevator]] / Man (Bald): / ARTHUR: Listen: we all have phobias. Mine used to be a fear of being fantastically rad. BUT I GOT OVER IT. / / [[Elevator]] / ARTHUR: And you can, too. You just need to face your fear of ducks. Face it, and control it. / Man (Bald): H-how do I do that? / / [[Elevator]] / Man (Bald): / ... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090207.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 08 / 2009 | [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: Cookie Monster doesn't eat cookies anymore? / SHELDON: Nope. Now he promotes healthy eating. / / [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: Seriously? / SHELDON: Yep. They wanted to help reverse the epidemic of childhood obesity. / / [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: Yeah, but... OK, but... Dang. / SHELDON: I know. It both makes... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090208.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 09 / 2009 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (Rocks)]] / FLACO: / SHELDON: To heck with this. We should go on an adventure today. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (Rocks)]] / SHELDON: And you know what? We don't even need your dad. It can just be US! Whatcha feel like doing? / FLACO: SQUEE! squee squee... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090209.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 10 / 2009 | [[Computer Room]] / Computer: / ARTHUR: Whatcha got up on the ol' Computertron? / GRAMP: The "Point Watchers" website. / / [[Computer Room]] / Computer: / GRAMP: It's a diet program where foods are given "points," and you track your diet by adding 'em up. / ARTHUR: I see. "Math makes it fun." / / [[Computer Room]] / Computer:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090210.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 11 / 2009 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (shrubbery)]] / OSO: / ARTHUR: / GRAMP: In traditional "point watchers", you'd go to a meeting, sit in a circle, and SHARE how your diet was going. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (shrubbery)]] / GRAMP: But the web stuff is so much easier. I log in, enter... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090211.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 12 / 2009 | [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / jar: / NARRATOR: On "Point Watchers," you're constantly looking for foods that fill you up, but have low points. / GRAMP: Apple sauce, come to poppa. / / [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / jar: / NARRATOR: But you can't eat the same four foods forever, so you stay on the lookout for new,... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090212.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 13 / 2009 | [[THE HOUSE]] / cup: / Laptop: / NARRATOR: Every time you log your weight on "Point Watchers," the system is quick to congratulate you.
/ / GRAMP: / Computer: You lost a pound! Congrats! / / NARRATOR: Sometimes, these auto-responses try to be helpful / Computer: Don't think a pound is a lot? What if we told you... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090213.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 14 / 2009 | [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / treadmill: / NARRATOR: On the "Point Watchers" diet, you can EARN more food points by exercising. / GRAMP: phoo! / / [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / treadmill: / NARRATOR: Feel like eating cake? You can earn it with a few hours of working out. / GRAMP: huff huff huff / / [[THE HOUSE (generic... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090214.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 15 / 2009 | [[THE HOUSE]] / treadmill: / NARRATOR: / GRAMP: sometimes I worry that America is in a long, slow decline from its peak. That it might not be a world leader in the future. / ARTHUR: Are you kidding? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / treadmill: / ARTHUR: Granted we're in tough shape at the moment, and it's gonna be 5-10 years... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090215.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 16 / 2009 | [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: It's funny how quickly technology moves down-market. 60 years ago, the automatic transmission was cutting-edge engineering. But now, you see shops that look like this... / / Advertisement: STAN, STU & RICK The Transmission Guys "Doin' the job right" / / [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090216.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 17 / 2009 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Man (Generic): Hark! What be this thou has brought from the new world? / man (generic) 1: 'tis called "the peanut" / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Man (Generic): How now? Be that a real word? "legume"?? / man (generic) 1: But tis not actually a nut. 'tis a legume / / [[nonspecific... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090217.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 18 / 2009 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Butterfly: / ARTHUR: Ever since I was a widdle baby duck, I've been amazed by butterflies. / SHELDON: / / Butterfly: / ARTHUR: They go into their cocoon lookin' like a freakshow of pure nasty... but they come out lookin' like an ANGEL. / / Butterfly: / ARTHUR: They... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090218.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 19 / 2009 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: A PEN! QUICK, A PEN! I got a business idea I have to write down.
/ / SHELDON: ! / / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: The potential market is huge! Can't believe no one's thought of this. Billions! Billions! / / Sheet of paper: / Pencil: / ARTHUR: Gotta write it down before I forget: / SHELDON: / / Sheet... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090219.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 20 / 2009 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Makeup for guys?? It's not gonna fly. / ARTHUR:
/ Oh, it'll fly. You just gotta market it right. ...Market it for the ultimate dude. / / ARTHUR: Like, you rebrand "concealer" as Mega Conceal X-4. / / ARTHUR: And the commercial would say "Too many rugby scars... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090220.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 21 / 2009 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Marketing makeup to dudes isn't impossible. You just gotta put it in a framework they can accept. / FLACO: / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Can: / ARTHUR: Like, for example, this seemingly ordinary beer can. ...Go ahead. Crack 'er open. / / [[OUTSIDE... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090221.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 22 / 2009 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Advertising is all about the bait-and-switch. / FLACO: / / ARTHUR: So if we're gonna sell makeup to DUDES, we gotta shroud it in classic dude-speak. / FLACO: / / ARTHUR: Stuff like chicken wings, football, car rims, bratwurst... All the stuff dudes go nuts... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090222.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 23 / 2009 | [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / ARTHUR: Bad news, Flaco. We did some market research on selling makeup to dudes, and the results weren't pretty. / FLACO: / / ARTHUR: 85% of guys said that "their job" was the only thing that gets them to shower.
/ / FLACO: / / ARTHUR: And when asked to describe their hair-care... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090223.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 24 / 2009 | [[nonspecific (white background) (Narration Panel)]] / NARRATOR: If you have GUESTS coming over, and you're short on time, you have TWO CHOICES / / [[THE HOUSE]] / vacuum cleaner: / NARRATOR: 1. You can shower and dress first, which leaves you no time to clean the house... / Man and Woman: / GRAMP: Welcome! Don't... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090224.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 25 / 2009 | [[Bathroom]] / Soap: / NARRATOR: "Guest towels" are bad enough. But "guest soaps" are a ridiculous, ridiculous concept. / GRAMP: / / [[Bathroom]] / Soap: [commentary text, pointing to soaps] Shell-shaped. Thematically matched with a shell-shaped bowl. / NARRATOR: Usually shaped like flowers or butterflies, guest... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090225.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 26 / 2009 | [[nonspecific (white background) (Narration Panel)]] / NARRATOR: When you're a guest in someone else's house, it can go one of two ways: / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / gift: / GRAMP: / NARRATOR: 1. There's the super-host, who overdoes it. / Woman (Old): ...Roger and I put together a basket of handmade... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090226.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 27 / 2009 | [[nonspecific (white background) (Narration Panel)]] / NARRATOR: When you're a guest in someone else's house, bedding options get weird / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / sofa: / NARRATOR: 1. There's the den-couch option, but that can be awkward. / GRAMP: Um / Man (Old): Oh, don't mind us. Just watchin' "Nightline." / Woman... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090227.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 28 / 2009 | [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / Newspaper: / Glasses: / NARRATOR: Benjamin Franklin famously remarked that "Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days." / GRAMP: / / [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / Newspaper: / Glasses: / fish: / NARRATOR: This is particularly true when the guest IS a fish. / GRAMP: No. ...NO. / FLACO:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090228.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 01 / 2009 | [[nonspecific (white background) (Narration Panel)]] / NARRATOR: 4 ways to hold wine (...and what each means) / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Wine: / NARRATOR: 1. Holding it by the base or stem (You're drinking white wine, and want to keep the wine chilled) / GRAMP: / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Wine:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090301.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 02 / 2009 | [[Outdoors]] / swings: / ARTHUR: I can understand words like "despondent." It SOUNDS like what it means. "disssssss-ponnn-dent" / FLACO: / / [[Outdoors]] / swings: / ARTHUR: But what freaks me out are words that sound like they're breezy and fun and "hey-pull-up-a-chair" ...but are actually TERRIBLE THINGS.... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090302.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 03 / 2009 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Sheet of paper: / GRAMP: I got a traffic ticket in the mail today. / ARTHUR: Oooo, harsh. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Sheet of paper: / GRAMP: It was caught on film by those traffic cameras. ODDLY ENOUGH, I don't even look like myself. / ARTHUR: / / [[nonspecific... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090303.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 04 / 2009 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: You canNOT drive my car. / ARTHUR: But I did! I totally did! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: No, I'm saying you CANNOT drive my car. / ARTHUR: And I'm telling you it's possible! I did it! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: Let me restate: you... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090304.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 05 / 2009 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: You're coming with me to traffic court to take the blame. / ARTHUR: Like heck I am. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: You ARE. You're gonna tell that judge YOU ran that red. / ARTHUR: No way, Pompeii. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: I am not... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090305.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 06 / 2009 | [[Courthouse (Courtroom)]] / Judge: Sir, this court doesn't look kindly on pranks. / ARTHUR: / GRAMP: Your Honor! I'm not lying! My duck drove my car! He ran the light! HE CAN TELL YOU. / / [[Courthouse (Courtroom)]] / GRAMP: Duck, don't you go all Warner-Brothers-frog on me. YOU TELL HER. / ARTHUR: / / [[Courthouse... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/090306.html |
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