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| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 11 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: 1991: New laws stop "broadcast faxing" / / [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: 2003: The "Do Not Call" Law is passed / / [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: 2009: The "C'mon! Stop spamming me" law is established / / [[THE HOUSE (Bedroom)]] / NARRATOR: 2032: The "Do Not Sneak Under My Bed And Whisper Subliminal... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060311.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 12 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Man! John Williams' music in Star Wars just MAKES those movies. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Wouldn't it be weird if he had been born in a different era? He would've had to be a court composer or something. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: That wouldn't have been weird. He would've just written... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060312.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 13 / 2006 | [[The House]] / SHELDON: Zod? What are you doing here? / General Zod: They're...They're making a new Superman movie. / / [[The House]] / General Zod: And they didn't... / um... / / [[The House]] / / [[The House]] / SHELDON: Hey, listen--you need some money or sum'in? / General Zod: It's just...not a lot of people KNEELING... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060313.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 14 / 2006 | SHELDON: So what are you guys doing for cash these days? / Zod: It's tough. Not a lot of call for "Superman 2" villains. / / Zod: But sometimes Ursa picks up extra money saying her signature line for fans. / SHELDON: Which is...? / / Ursa (General Zod's minion): ZOOOPAMAN! / Non (General Zod's minion): Some fan... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060314.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 15 / 2006 | SHELDON: What's going on? / Zod: Non is still trying to shoot eyebeam like Superman. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060315.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 16 / 2006 | SHELDON: What the heck?! How did all these viruses get on my laptop?? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Did you use my laptop? / GRAMP: No. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: No.. / / Non (General Zod's minion): E-mail said to click for free pony! I click! I click so much! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060316.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 17 / 2006 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: Superman 2 villians! I am so disappointed in you! / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: I open my home to you when times are tough, and what do you do? YOU RUIN MY LAPTOP! / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: I think you know what this means... / Zod: No... NO! Not that! / / [[Inside... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060317.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 18 / 2006 | Ursa (General Zod's minion): General! We can NOT let ourselves be put in that glass prison again! / / Zod: Zod fears no prison, my dear. / Ursa (General Zod's minion): But sir..! Remember the problems we had in that thing? / / [[Space]] / Ursa (General Zod's minion): Non! Put your socks back on! It smells like... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060318.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 19 / 2006 | sign: Because you asked for it... / Gameboard: THE KNEEL BEFORE ZOD BOARDGAME!
/ START --> Escape from a flying pane of space-glass! Roll again! --> You stumble upon a U.S.-U.S.S.R. moon mission that NEVER HAPPENED ... go back one --> You've found planet Hoo-Ston! Seems wet... lose a turn --> Non breaks... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060319.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 20 / 2006 | Zod: You have made a grave error, earth-child! You have made an enemy of General Zod! / / Zod: I shall crush you completely! Your lands, your possessions, your very life will gladly be given in tribute to me, General Zod!! / / SHELDON: Oh God... / Zod: ZOD!! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060320.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 21 / 2006 | Zod: I'm sorry I blew up at you, Sheldon. / / Zod: I'm just frustrated. I haven't been getting good acting gigs these days. / / Zod: My last job was a glitzy national ad campaign for Oldsmobile. / / SHELDON: That sounds pretty good to m- / Zod: OLDSMOBILE WENT OUT OF BUSINESS 3 YEARS AGO! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060321.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 22 / 2006 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Zod: Your little plan has failed Sheldon! Zod has escaped from your prison! / SHELDON: ...My prison was two hula hoops. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Zod: Yes... YES! But I escaped! / SHELDON: From hula hoops. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060322.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 23 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: You're leaving? / Zod: Indeed! We are kicking off the dust from this place and taking to the skies! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Zod: Superman 2 villains... away! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[Bus Stop]] http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060323.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 24 / 2006 | [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: You ever do that thing where you hold your nose while pushing air into your sinuses? ...And the air has nowhere to go, so it comes out your eye sockets? / / [[THE POND]] / / [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: You and I lead very different lives. / SHELDON: I call 'em "eye farts". http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060324.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 25 / 2006 | [[Store]] / GRAMP: Mm... delicious. And what aisle can I find these on? / Salesperson: They're right here, sir! / / [[Store]] / GRAMP: OH. So they're literally right here? Within reach? Right in front of us? / / [[Store]] / GRAMP: Guess there's no need to tell you I'm off to find them. You can, um, see with your own... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060325.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 26 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: All life on earth derives its energy from the sun. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: The sun feeds the photosynthetic plant, which is eaten by the herbivore, which is eaten by the carnivore, etc., etc... / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest,... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060326.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 27 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Woman (Asian): < Godzilla! He is coming! Hnhh! > / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Man (Asian): < Quick! To the hills! Hnhh! Godzilla! > / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Commander (Asian): < Hnhh! Godzilla! Hnhh! > / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Someone:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060327.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 28 / 2006 | [[Jabba's palace]] / Jabba the Hutt: Hey Steve... STEVE! ...Does this hat make me look fat? / NARRATOR: ...Why it sucks to work at Jabba's palace http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060328.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 29 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: "Funzo - the perfect board game for ages 9... to 99!" / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Ooo... sorry, Reginald. You'll have to sit this one out. / Reginald: Gad-durnit. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060329.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 30 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: But I DID rake the leaves! Just like you asked! / GRAMP: You just left ‘em in a pile! …You gotta get rid of ‘em! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / (SOUND FX): Vigada! Vigada! VaROOM! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / (SOUND FX): WAAAAAA / / [[OUTSIDE... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060330.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 31 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Most people don't give God enough credit for being a poet. But the very fact that a rose HAS thorns is poetry. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: It's saying with beauty comes ugliness. With love comes pain... / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060331.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 01 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Today at the market I heard a Russian accent, a Korean accent, a French accent, and a Brazilian accent. All in one store! Isn't that neat? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: You gotta love living in a country where you can hear such a beautiful chorus of voices! / ARTHUR: All yelling at one a... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060401.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 02 / 2006 | [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: Hey Arthur - you wanna go to Japan with me? / ARTHUR: Japan? / / [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: Yeah! I'm going to meet Kazufumi Goto. He's the biologist trying to bring back the wooly mammoth! / / [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: Bring back the mammoth? What kind of doofus-y GUY SCIENCE is that? / / [[nonspecific... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060402.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 03 / 2006 | [[Courthouse]] / NARRATOR: Today: how the U.S. jury system works. / Potential Juryman: Your honor? I can’t serve on this jury. / / [[Courthouse]] / NARRATOR: All the clever, selfish folks have figured out how to game the system / Potential Juryman: …My business would collapse without me. / / [[Courthouse]] / NARRATOR:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060403.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 04 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: And then, when there's a quiet moment, you stand up and say - "Your Honor? Juror #7 keeps pincing me on my delicious tooshie." / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: "Delicious tooshie"? / ARTHUR: But you really gotta own it when you say it. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: And how will that get me out of... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060404.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 05 / 2006 | [[Courthouse]] / lawyer: Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, do not let yourself be swayed by emotional appeals. This case is about FACTS. / / [[Courthouse]] / lawyer: Indisputable facts. Like "I am wearing a suit." / / [[Courthouse]] / lawyer: "The sky is blue"... or "My client has eyes." ALL FACTS. "Warm eyes...... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060405.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 06 / 2006 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: The five stages of jury duty: / NARRATOR: 1. Denial / GRAMP: NO NO NO NO NO ... I'm too pretty N NO / / [[nonspecific (white background) (no borders)]] / NARRATOR: 2. Resentment / GRAMP: ... How come YOU never get called? / ARTHUR: I'm not technically a citizen / / [[nonspecific... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060406.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 07 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: And as they're arguing, Lady Astor turns to Winston Churchill and says: "Sir, if you were my husband, I would put poison in your coffee." / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: And he doesn't even blink. He just shoots back, "Madame, if... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060407.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 08 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / Television: Do you ride a motorcycle? Been injured in an auto accident? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Television: At BIKE LAW, we specialize in motorcycle accidents. We get you the money you deserve. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Television: That's right! You're OWED this money! And Bike Law can get it for you! Money!... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060408.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 09 / 2006 | [[The House]] / SHELDON: Hey Gramp... why are actors called "thespians"? / GRAMP: After the 1st century Greek king THESPOS. / / [[The House]] / GRAMP: Thespos knew that the opposing army from Crete would crush his troops. / / [[The House]] / GRAMP: But by using a combination of monologues, interpretive dance, and... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060409.html |
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