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| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 30 / 2011 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Book: / SHELDON: "Some say the world will end in fire,
/ some say in ice.
/ From what I've tasted of desire,
/ I hold with those who favor fire.
/ But if I had to perish twice,
/ I think I know enough of hate
/ to say that for destruction ice
/ is also great... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110330.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 31 / 2011 | [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: / FLACO: / / [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: / FLACO: / / [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: / FLACO: / / [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: / FLACO: / / [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: ...YOU SWIM LIKE MY NIGHTMARES / FLACO: squee! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110331.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 01 / 2011 | [[Store]] / cash register: / Cashier: and since you're a VALUED CUSTOMER, here's a bonus coupon. / GRAMP: wait, this is for the thing i just bought. / / [[Store]] / cash register: / Cashier: Yep. we save you money as a VALUED CUSTOMER. / GRAMP: But... Can't I use it now... On the thing i just bought? / / [[Store]] / cash... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110401.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 04 / 2011 | [[THE HOUSE]] / Coffee maker: / GRAMP: Time for my mornin' ode. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Coffee maker: / GRAMP: I sing now of my coffee the bright start of my day. Far tastier than toffee: my hot-brewed, sweet, cafe. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Coffee maker: / GRAMP: It elevates and alleviates, and soothes with just a sip. A drink... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110404.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 05 / 2011 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (lawn)]] / Balloons: / ARTHUR: / FLACO: / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (lawn)]] / Balloons: / ARTHUR: / FLACO: / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (lawn)]] / Balloons: / ARTHUR: / FLACO: / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (lawn)]] / Balloons: / FLACO:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110405.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 06 / 2011 | [[THE HOUSE]] / baseball: / GRAMP: / NARRATOR: When a dog wants to play ball, all it takes is...
/ A dangling hand / OSO: hrrrr hrrr hrrr / / [[THE HOUSE]] / baseball: / GRAMP: / NARRATOR: A passing crotch / OSO: hrrr hrrr / / [[THE HOUSE]] / baseball: / GRAMP: / NARRATOR: A bathroom door slightly ajar / OSO: hrrr hrrr http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110406.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 07 / 2011 | [[Tron Grid]] / Old Man: / / [[Tron Grid]] / Old Man: / / [[Tron Grid]] / Old Man: / / [[Tron Grid]] / Old Man: / Old Lady: bahhh! get off the grid! / NARRATOR: ...Tron: Legacy-Computing http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110407.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 08 / 2011 | [[THE HOUSE (the front doorway)]] / Garden Gnome: / Crystal Ball: / bird feeder: / wind chimes: / NARRATOR: What Your Lawn Ornaments Say to The World / NARRATOR: Garden Gnomes: "Well I am chock full of whimsy up in here." / NARRATOR: The Empty Birdfeeder: "Two summers ago? When I bought this? ...was super commited... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110408.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 11 / 2011 | [[THE HOUSE (Kitchen)]] / Table: / Food: / GRAMP: / NARRATOR: Today! Punctuation marks that never caught on! / ARTHUR: mm... yeah. That's good. Real... creamy *music note* / NARRATOR: *music note* = Hear that? The lilt in my voice? I am straight-up lying, brother. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: / SHELDON:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110411.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 12 / 2011 | [[Store]] / GRAMP: Check it out: They're selling "Easter Candy Corn" / ARTHUR: Whaaat. Candy corn is Halloween. / / [[Store]] / GRAMP: Exactly! It makes no sense. Corn's not even a spring vegetable. / ARTHUR: How lame do they think we are?? / / [[Store]] / GRAMP: / NARRATOR: Easter Candy Corn! Who are you kidding You'll... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110412.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 13 / 2011 | [[sidewalk]] / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: Snap-a-doo: It is windy today. / / [[sidewalk]] / ARTHUR: Ooo, hey: wanna see a cool trick? / SHELDON: Sure. / / [[sidewalk]] / ARTHUR: If you angle... your wings... just... right... / / [[sidewalk]] / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: Scrumptious duck butt... AWAAAAY! / NARRATOR: foop http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110413.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 14 / 2011 | [[Lake]] / Ball: / SHELDON: Did you hear they're trying to re-brand "high-fructose corn syrup."? / ARTHUR: Yeah, it's having a public relations nightmare, so they want people to start callin' it "corn sugar." / / [[Lake]] / Ball: / SHELDON: I wonder if you could do that with ANY product? Re-spin it in a happy-go-lucky... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110414.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 15 / 2011 | [[Lake]] / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: If they really want to re-brand high-fructose corn syrup as "corn sugar" ...it's going to take more than a new name. / / [[Lake]] / ARTHUR: They gotta go whole-hog. Reframe it as Classic Americana. ...Play up "corn sugar" as the patriotic, down-home choice. / / [[old-timey southern... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110415.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 18 / 2011 | [[Kitchen]] / GRAMP: Are you still yapping about the "high-fructose corn syrup" name change?!? / ARTHUR: I am! It takes such a brass set to change it to "corn sugar!" / / [[Kitchen]] / ARTHUR: We should do that for ALL terrible foods. "cholesterol" From now on, the emarketing name is "Butter Squeezin's" / / [[Kitchen]] / ARTHUR:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110418.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 19 / 2011 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: oh - Hey! How was the pond today? / ARTHUR: MMF. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: You, uh, Go fishin'? / ARTHUR: MMF. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: ...Any... regrets? / ARTHUR: FMMF. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110419.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 20 / 2011 | [[THE HOUSE]] / Sandwich: / jar of jelly: / ARTHUR: Aww MAN. Someone left traces of peanut butter in the jelly. bleagh / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: In food terms, that's like finding a strangers wet hairs on the shower walls. It's SEEMINGLY innocuous - it's just a human head-hair that got wet - but somehow... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110420.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 21 / 2011 | [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: How come you haven't invested in gold, yet? That price is sky-high. / SHELDON: Because I refuse to invest in a shiny rock- as I don't live in the 13th century / / [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: What, are we medieval alchemists that gold is still our most precious item?? / / [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: / SHELDON:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110421.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 22 / 2011 | [[Kitchen]] / Dishwasher: / NARRATOR: THE ARGUMENT IS THE SAME IN EVERY HOUSE: / SHELDON: No! Knives gotta go DOWN in the dishwasher. That way no one gets stabbed accidentally. / GRAMP: No! They gotta go blade UP or they don't get properly cleaned! / / [[Kitchen]] / NARRATOR: HERE'S HOW YOU SHUT THEM BOTH UP: / ARTHUR:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110422.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 25 / 2011 | [[THE HOUSE]] / Lamp: / Chair: / GRAMP: / NARRATOR: 1. First, read the harrowing, Pulitzer-prize winning tale of a father trying to protect his son in an ashen, post-apocalyptic world. / / [[THE HOUSE (The chair)]] / Chair: / GRAMP: / NARRATOR: 2. Finish it, and lay it gently on your lap for five seconds. / / [[nonspecific... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110425.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 26 / 2011 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Bike Helmet: / Bicycle: / Dave Kellett: / NARRATOR: Today: Autobiographical Comics! BIKE MOVES DAVE HAS TRIED / NARRATOR: Sure. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Bicycle: / Bike Helmet: / Dave Kellett: / NARRATOR: Had to. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Bicycle: / Bike... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110426.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 27 / 2011 | [[THE HOUSE]] / Computer: / NARRATOR: the HISTORY of computer interface design
/ ... is basically a dawning realization that we're all lazy slobs. / GRAMP: I gotta TYPE my commands in?? There's gotta be a better way! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Computer: / GRAMP: I gotta MOVE this mouse? Ugggh. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / iPad: / GRAMP:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110427.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 28 / 2011 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Book: / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: I've figured out a whole new duck posture. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: There's the "Old Traditional." / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: ... The "foxes are nearby" move. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest,... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110428.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 29 / 2011 | [[THE POND (in pond)]] / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: What is the deal with dudes? / / [[THE POND (in pond)]] / ARTHUR: Why must they take already tricky modes of transport and make them more complicated? / / [[THE POND (in pond)]] / ARTHUR: Skateboarding? Apparently it's not inherently dangerous enough. so lets add a tiny... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110429.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 02 / 2011 | [[Gas Station]] / TV: / Car: / Gas Pump: / NARRATOR: Hi! Thanks for pumping at Exxon-Mobil! / GRAMP: Oh c'monnnn. A tv HERE?? This was my last introspective place. / / [[Gas Station]] / TV: / Car: / Gas Pump: / NARRATOR: We thought we'd tell you about all the great snacks we have inside. / GRAMP: Lorrd. / / [[Gas Station]] / TV:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110502.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 03 / 2011 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: HOW TO THROW OUT A BACK IN ONE EASY STEP / NARRATOR: Take a human being... / GRAMP: Hi / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Calendar: / NARRATOR: Let them get just a bit older... / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: Aaaand BAM: Back thrown out! / GRAMP: Ah,... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110503.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 04 / 2011 | [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / NARRATOR: Is it when they stop trying to get up off the floor? / GRAMP: This is fine. I'm fine. I'll just stay down here. It's fine. / / [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / Pillow: / Blanket: / NARRATOR: Is it when pillows and blankets are brought out? / GRAMP: Thank you. / / [[THE HOUSE (generic... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110504.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 05 / 2011 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Table: / ARTHUR: Hey! You're up! / GRAMP: ...I am. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: You're... kinda movin' like a tree sloth, though. / GRAMP: Yeah. I have to walk all Hunchy McHuncherton. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: What happens if you try to... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110505.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 06 / 2011 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: If you drink coffee ONLY with milk or cream, you have faced this moment / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: You open your fridge and realize you're completely out. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: And as your eyes desperately scan the fridge, a question arises.... Would yogurt work??? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP:... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110506.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 09 / 2011 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: WE ARE OUT OF MILK. / ARTHUR: What are you doing? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: / GRAMP: And I very much need a substitute for my coffee. Very much / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: / GRAMP: But nothing works, I've tried butter, I've tried yogurt, I've tried / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: That name is a nest... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110509.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 10 / 2011 | [[THE HOUSE]] / Coffee Cup: / ARTHUR: Don't make this a big deal. If we don't have milk for coffee, just drink it black / GRAMP: But... that could ruin a life long relationship / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Coffee Cup: / ARTHUR: / GRAMP: For decades, I've turned to coffee to put a spring in my step. I've come to rely on... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/110510.html |
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