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|Conversation (meteor)||Rabid: Ha ha you would NOT believe this CRAZY conversation I am overhearing RIGHT NOW!! / Rabid: This couple is, like, having this passionate self-congratulatory time declaiming the public-interface aspect of cell-phone usage as ANTISOCIAL! Yeah, exactly! Like they just thought of it!! / Rabid: Totally...|
|Conversation (parachute)||Rabid: Ha ha you would NOT believe this CRAZY conversation I am overhearing RIGHT NOW!! / Round-headed monster: So you know that coffee place on the corner near me that just opened, S--? / Square-headed monster: Yeah, I remember it. / Round-headed monster: They're making good money -- every time I walk...|
|Conversation (disappearing)||Rabid: Ha ha you would NOT believe this CRAZY conversation I am overhearing RIGHT NOW! / Federal Agent One: We've got a lock... tracing... LOCATION CONFIRMED!!
/ Federal Agent Two: LET'S MOVE OUT! / Rabid: Yeah they were saying CRAZY stupid stuff!! / [[Rabid is pulled into a van.]]
|Lingam (Room service)||Rabid: You mean the figurine is a FAKE!? / Dr Quickly: Assuredly so!! / Noel Mauvais: Damn! So much for THAT evil scheme -- and I can't afford the hotel room now, either... Might as well go nuts with ordering room service. / Noel Mauvais: GASP! THE AUTHENTIC FIGURINE!! / Bellboy: et voila! / Noel Mauvais:...|
|Lingam (changes)||Rabid: You mean the figurine is a fake!? / Dr Quickly: Assuredly so!! / Rabid: But then won't the replicas be likely to exhibit the same STRANGE POWERS!? / Dr Quickly: Assuredly so!! / Rabish: MY YOGA -- I CAN NO LONGER CONTROL IT!! / Space Frog: OH NO MY NEW PRODUCT IS SELLING LIKE HOTCAKES BUT I NEEDED...|
|Lingam (argument)||Rabid: You mean the figurine is a fake!? / Dr Quickly: Assuredly so!! / Rabid: ... "Assuredly so"!? That's all you've said for, like, a week!! Are you even CAPABLE of saying something else? / Dr Quickly: Assuredly so!! / Rabid: Can you DEMONSTRATE this ability!? / Dr Quickly: Assuredly so!! / Rabid: Well...|
|Milk (poisonous)||Dr Quickly: HEY! / Dr Quickly: Stop drinking that, YOU FOOL!! Your life is in PERIL!! / Dr Quickly: What the... but HOW can this BE!? / Dr Quickly: I'm from THE FUTURE!! / Dr Quickly: No, wait... I remember this. I can't believe I thought it would be funny to pull a prank on my FUTURE self. / Dr Quickly:...|
|Milk (lucky)||Rabish: HEY!! / Rabish: You son of a bitch bastard that's my LUCKY MILK!! / Dr Quickly: I can get you more!! / Rabish: YOU CAN'T AND YOU KNOW IT!! / Rabish: I FAILED ALL MY CLASSES!? / Rabish: MY INSURANCE POLICY IS VOID!? / Rabish: I'M BEING HIT BY A TRUCK!? / Vulture: YOU SON A BITCH BASTARD THAT'S...|
|Milk (Sonny Bono)||Mickey: HEY!! / Mickey: Uhhh HEY! HEY!! / Mickey: AHHH HEY / Mickey: ... hey... / <
|Breaking the Fourth Panel||[[This is a selection of fourth panels from previous comics, with the dialogue removed.]]|
|Classic Transmitter: Lisa's Story||The Devil makes himself a bath.|
|Classic Transmitter: Lisa's Other Story||The Boy hides from The Devil.|
|Breaking the Fourth Panel: Telekinesis||Space Frog: BUYING THIS TELEKINESIS DEVICE IS THE BEST DECISION I EVER MADE / Rabid: THE PHONE IS ANIMATED BY AN UNSEEN FORCE!
|Breaking the Fourth Panel: Linden Trees||[[Space Frog sings O-Zone's "Dragostea din tei"]] / Rabid: If that's Buck complaining about Space Frog's operatic rugose cone again, I'm going to hang up on him. / Noel: Engarde, touche! / Dr Quickly: Oh that is so cliche! / Noel: Poop. / Rabid: Go on... / Newton Frog: So the cones erred, and I fear...|
|Breaking the Fourth Panel: Ring Ring||Space Frog: HA HA HE CAN'T RESIST MY DIABOLICAL TELEPHONE RAYS OF BURNING HUNGER / Rabid: ARR UM NUM NUM / Noel: In the future, Rabid has eaten all the phones! / Dr Quickly: That can't be! / Noel: It must be! / Rabid: Delicious? / Space Frog: UNACCEPTABLE! / Rabish: His crime? His punishment? / Rabot:...|
|Breaking the Fourth Panel: Dialectic||Space Frog: AH COMMERCE, TRUELY THE CORNERSTONE OF OUR GREAT SOCIETY. WHAT OTHER SYSTEM COULD PROVIDE US WITH SUCH WONDEROUS WEALTH AND PRIVILAGE [sic] OVER THE LESSER NATIONS OF THE WORLD. / Rabid: I BELIEVE THIS INANIMATE OBJEST [sic] IS TRYING TO COMMUNICATE WITH ME. ALAS I CANNOT UNDERSTAND IT'S...|
|Breaking the Fourth Panel: The Mule||Space Frog: TOUCHING EVERYTHING I SELL IS MY PREROGATIVE / Rabid: PSYCHOMETRY IS A BURDEN!
|Breaking the Fourth Panel: Blood Money||Space Frog: ACCORDING TO THE CALCULATIONS OF BOTH MY PRINTING CALCULATOR AND MY PSYCHIC PHALLUS YOU MUST PAY ME NOT IN MONEY BUT IN BLOOD HA HA HA HA HA HA HA / Rabid: SINCE SPACE FROG BEGAN REQUIRING MURDER TO SHOP AT HIS POPULAR STORE THE PHONE HAS BEEN RINGING OFF THE HOOK WITH REPORTERS TRYING TO...|
|Bellybutton (flavours)||Rabish: Can't you just enjoy the beauty of a bellybutton!? / Rabid: Man, that sort of sex act is so... VANILLA. I'm more of a LICORICE kind of guy. / Space Frog: YOU'RE LOOKING FOR STRAWBERRY ICE CREAM OH HO HO YOU'VE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE / Dr Quickly: Be discreet! / Space Frog: GET HIM FELLOW VICE...|
|Filler: Conductors||Dr Quickly: I want leaves of gold! / Rabid: Are you greedy for a valuable element? / Dr Quickly: OF COURSE NOT!! / Dr Quickly: I need 'em for science! / Dr Quickly: Conductors! Sheet conductors! For my sheet music!! / Dr Quickly: It's chock-a-block with conductor-requiringment! / [[A music stand...|
|Newscasting||Rabid: Those flowers were a romantical gift! Why you eat them!? / Rabish: They contain an INEDIBLE BOMB!! / [[Rabish is exploded in an image projected behind Space Frog who is a news announcer.]] / Space Frog: WE REGRET TO INFORM OUR VIEWERS THAT CONSUMING INEDIBLE BOMBS DOES NOT DEFUSE THEM SEEING AS...|
|Breaking the Fourth Panel: +++ATH0||<
|Bellybutton (breasts)||Rabish: Can't you just enjoy the beauty of a bellybutton? / Rabid: No time for that when there're LUSCIOUS BREASTS to ogle!! / Dr Quickly: Uh, yeah, we COULD do that if you WANT / Rabish: YES / Dr Quickly: It's an expensive surgery... / Rabish: I'LL PAY!! / Space Frog: THAT IS THE FIFTH TRAY YOU'VE DEMOLISHED...|
|Bellybutton (science club)||Rabish: Can't you just enjoy the beauty of a bellybutton? / Dr Quickly: Foolish girl! This is SCIENCE, not some BEAUTY CLUB. Our taxonomic efforts have already revealed some SEVERAL new forms beyond the traditional "innie" and "outie"!! / Dr Quickly: ... The "BENNY": Rather than being tied in a knot,...|
|Foreigners (bread)||Rabid: May I help you? / False Foreigner: Yes hel-lo we have for-eign and re-quire an help to find ho-tel / Rabid: That is an astonishingly artificial bit of linguistic struggle! Underneath your guise of foreignness I unmask you to be DOMESTIC TERRORISTS!! / False Foreigner's Friend: Cripes! / False...|
|Foreigners (GRIND)||Rabid: May I help you? / False Foreigner: Yes hel-lo we have for-eign and re-quire an help to find ho-tel. / Rabid, in a foreign language: Have no fear! I recognize your accent and am now speaking flawlessly in your native tongue!!>> / False Foreigner's Friend: Uhh... dude, what? / False Foreigner: Come...|
|Foreigners (gobble)||Rabid: May I help you? / False Foreigner: Yes hel-lo we have for-eign and re-quire an help to find ho-tel. / Rabid: Certainly! And at an excellent rate only granted to the AUTHENTIC of foreigners!! / False Foreigner's Friend: heh heh / False Foreigner: Shh! heh / False Foreigner's Friend: But-- how did...|
|Pet Store (Teeth)||Rabid: I'll take two! / Rabid: HEY 'ABITH OO OO IKE IE OO EEF?
/ Rabish: Mouse teeth don't mean you can eat my cheese. / Rabid: ... OW A'OUT 'OW?
/ Rabish: Well, uh, I don't think snakes EAT cheese! / Rabid: Don't you have ANYTHING that would help?
/ Dr Quickly: You know, I just MIGHT!
|Pet Store (Breeding)||Rabid: I'll take two! / Rabid: Come on you little bastards! BREED!! / Animal: whimper / Other Animal: whine / The Author: Notice: Rabid brandishes a salami of reward, not a bludgeon of punishment. Rest easy, dear reader! / Noel: I'm sorry, but "they won't 'do it' with each other" is not covered by the...|
|Pet Store (The Kittens Hatmaker)||Rabid: I'll take two, please! / Rabid: Argh! All you ever do is sit around and eat my food! Get a job or get OUT!! / Orange Kitten: Mew? / Purple Kitten: Prum? / [[Dr Quickly is wearing a fancy straw boater.]] / Dr Quickly: And you say it was made by your kittens!? I'll buy it at any price for it is a...|
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