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College Roomies from Hell!!! the daily online comic strip [[April in bed, Margaret stands beside her]] / April: Hey Margaret, can I ask you a very personal question? / Margaret: Sure, I LOVE personal questions! / April: Have you ever had a...YOU KNOW? / Margaret: Why, lots of them. Dave taught me how! And my life is richer and sexier ever since. / April: Because... I haven't. And I was wondering if you could help me? / Margaret: Sure! Let's take all our clothes off first, and as soon as the food is here we can start! / [[Blue in a maid's outfit, holding a plate full of shrimps]] / Blue: Room service! Who wants SHRIMP? / April: Me! / Margaret: Me! / Marsha: YAY shrimp! / [[Dave lying in bed with a startled face]] / <> / Roger (singing): Mama was queen of the mambo, Papa was king of the congo! Deep down in the jungle I started bangin' my first bongo! / <> / Dave (thinking): What the... Bongos??? / [[Dave opening the door to Roger's room]] / Roger (singing): Every monkey'd like to be in my place instead of me cuz I'm the king of bongo, baby I'm the king of bongo BONG! / Dave: Can you play "The Mercy Seat"?
http://crfh.net/d/20060426.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! Archives [[Roger is sitting with a pair of bongos and smiling. Dave is next to him and looks haggard and tired. Mike has evidently just entered and looks bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.]] / Dave: Before I kill you, I have to ask. Who gave you the bongos? I'll have to kill them all as well. / Roger: Heh. Dave, you're a grinch with the artistic sensibility of a tree stump. You can't appreciate the soul of the Carribean. / Dave: Very nice porno dreams interrupted by off-key singing and syncopated, random noises that resemble the wails of the damned. This is your crime, Roger. It is full of evil. / Mike: Aaah, folks! What a gorgeous morning! The very light breeze, the sun already shining, the salty smell of the sea! And the mirror-like surface of the pool beneath! / [[Mike now has picked up Roger and looks as though he's about to toss him with great gusto.]] / Roger: See? Mike knows that the good things in life... are... uuuuh... wait? / [[Dave and Mike are looking off-panel, presumably in the direction of the pool. Mike looks tired but satisfied; Dave appears tired enough that his eyes are closed. Roger is not visible.]] / Roger: Aaaaaaaaargh! / <> / Mike: A roomie-tossing day is a HAPPY day. / Dave: You would be the coolest person ever, except you're lame. You forgot to toss the bongos as well. / Mike: Bongos? What bongos? / Roger: ARGH, CHLORINE!
http://crfh.net/d/20060428.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! the daily online comic strip Dave: Good show, Susho. But stay away from me. I know how your brain hampster just keeps on dancing. / Mike: I am always, ALWAYS judged before the real facts are known. / Dave: What facts, that you're a huge, unrepentant jerk? / Mike: I was actually doing him a favor! I mean, the girls are already down there, and their bikinis are small. And by the look of things, water's VERY cold. / [[Dave looks down not noticing Mike is about to push him off]] / Dave: oooooh, is it? I suppose that's because the sun's just perky? I mean even in the nippleys you'd suppose the water would get all hard really early, because there's not a lot of sun at night, and... / [[Mike's shouting at the just tossed Dave]] / Mike: Be careful! All's fun and games until pokes an eye out!
http://crfh.net/d/20060501.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! Archives [[Roger and Dave in the pool, fully clothed]] / Dave: CCCCCold! / Roger: Yeah, me and my two friends agree... / Dave: Hey! Where are the girls? There's no girls around here! / Roger: Well, what did you think this was, Spring of Jusenkyo? / Dave: He DARES to lie to me about breasts??? Son of a mud-blood! / [[Dave lasers upwards, towards Mike on the balcony above]] / <> / Mike: [[off-panel, above]] HaHAH! AMUSING! / Dave: Amuse THIS! / Mike: Haha! Missed me! / Dave: GRRRHGTKS! / [[Mike on the balcony, Chester falling ontop of him, hackles raised]] / Chester: <> / Mike: [[looking down into the pool]] Heheh. And the day's only started! I wonder who's going into the pool next?
http://crfh.net/d/20060505.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! the daily online comic strip [[Roger and Dave are in the pool. Dave is pulling himself out]] / Roger: Hey, Dave! Where are you going? / Dave: Where do you think? I'm going back to the room and opening a can of charred sea-food! / Roger: Well, remember! When moving in haste, low friction and momentum are your enemies! / [[Dave slips on the wet floor in his socks]] / Dave: What the hell is he talking about? Can't I go into a blind rage without him turning it into a nonsense AAAAARGH! / <> / [[He sails off-panel. A bikini top flies]] / <> / <>
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College Roomies from Hell!!! - May 10, 2006 [[Dave and Diana are outside the pool area on the ground. Dave lies on the tiled floor, blushing and covering his mouth with his hand. Diana is replacing her top]] / Dave: Oh my GOD, Di, I'm sorry. It was an accident. Are you okay? / Diana: Yeah, don't worry. I'm okay. / Dave: I'm sorry. I'm stupid. I was running around in wet socks, and, and slipped, and... / Diana: Well, be more careful next time. You could get hurt. / Dave: And I didn't mean to go running around with my mouth wide open like that. / Diana: That's okay. The teeth marks are not visible once I have my top on. / [[Diana now has her top back on.]] / Dave: [[averting his eyes]] Ugh, now you'll surely think I'm one of those groping perverted scumbags. Uuuugh. / Diana: YOU??? Hehehe. / Dave: And, and I got you all wet. / Diana: Well, no biggie. I was going to the pool anyway. / Dave: Are you done putting on your top? Ugh, I know, it's none of my business, I'm sorry... / Diana: Dave, seriously. Stop kicking yourself. It was an accident. Accidents happen. It's okay. / Dave: Thanks. Wow, you're really one of the nicest persons around... / Diana: Yes, I am! By the by, you owe me $20.
http://crfh.net/d/20060510.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - May 12, 2006 Diana: Sure, you and Mike are always having accidents, like that April incident yesterday... / Dave: Whu? Look, I don't know what you're talking about. I just slipped! / Diana: Uh-huh. Let's suppose for a minute that it WAS an accident. Still, they make you pay for broken jars at the supermarket. Sorry. / Dave: Crud! Well, that's too bad, because I just don't have $20! What are you gonna do about it, sue me? / [[Paul appears from the right, wringing a wet towel]] / Diana: Paul, did you remember to pack the whip? / Paul: Naw, but I have a wet towel! / Diana: I thought we ruled out rat tails as cruel and unusual punishment. / Paul: Well, I'm very out of practice! I bet he will be able to sit down in a few days! / Diana: Just don't send him to the ER like that last guy, okay?
http://crfh.net/d/20060512.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - May 15, 2006 [[Roger is in the middle of the swimming pool, looking somewhat bemused. Mike, having fallen off of the balcony as a result of Chester's mauling, has just fallen in next to him.]] / <> / Chester[[running away]]: <> / Mike: RARGH! Freaking cat! Come back here, I'm still not done with you! / Roger: Heheh. To be fair, Mike, the cat's only a Dave-puppet. And you know how he doesn't have a sense of humor... / Mike: Bah! Yeah, that's true. I guess no one's such a good sport as you. / Roger: Yeah, I am! I mean, even if the water's cold and you ruined my bongo-mood, I like fun and games. / [[Roger begins to transform, lifting one coyote paw out of the water.]] / Roger: The WERECOYOTE, on the other hand...
http://crfh.net/d/20060515.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - May 17, 2006 [[Were-Roger and Mike are wrestling in the middle of the swimming pool]] / Dave: [[off-panel]] OOOOW! Wait, wait! I didn't mean to do it! / Paul: [[off-panel]] Pay up! Or don't, more fun for me! / Dave: [[off-panel]] Not fair! I... OW! This is all Mike's fault, this is... OOW! / Roger and Mike: ... / <> / [[Dave, having jumped back into the pool, has climbed onto Mike, who still has Roger in a tentacle-head lock]] / Dave: Help! Help! Paul's rat-tailing my butt to Hell and back! / Mike: AARGH! Well, why don't you laser him or something? / Dave: Are you crazy??? For that I'd have to LOOK at him, and have you seen the size of that THONG? / Mike: Not really, but thanks for the mental images. / Roger: Oh great, now my attachment has an attachment!
http://crfh.net/d/20060517.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - May 19, 2006 [[Roger, Mike and Dave are still in a monkey-pile in the middle of the swimming pool]] / Paul: [[off-panel]] Aw! No fair, get out of the pool so we can resume the whippin'! / Roger: UGH! All right, I don't care what's going on just get the Hell off me! / Mike: Well, I can't move! Hey, Dave, could you move a bit to the right? I really need to grab you by the hair so I can slam-dunk you. / Dave: Shut up, bitches! I'm not getting down until Paul goes away. / Paul: [[off-panel]] Fat chance! You still gotta pay! / Dave: Ain't paying! Except in megawatts, baby! You can't wear that thong forever! / Paul: [[off-panel]] Hah! Watch me! / Dave: God FORBID! / Roger: Wait, wait! Money? Why do you owe him money? / Paul: [[off-panel]] Not me, Diana! He owes her money! / Roger: Uh, WHY? / Mike: Uh oh. / Dave: It was an accident! / Roger: WHAT was an accident? / Mike: UH OH. / Paul: [[off-panel]] Nothing! He did it on purpose, because he's kinky. Woo! / Dave: I did NOT! / Roger: WHAT did you do on purpose? / Dave: I, I was just innocently running around, and my mouth was open, and it was sort of sort of slipppppery and and her top was, was... / Roger: WHAT??? / Mike: OOOH s[[obscured]]t. / [[Mike's dad, carrying a drink, steps into the pool area]] / Roger: [[off-panel]] You like mouthfuls huh, well HERE is ONE! / Dave: [[off-panel]] Auugh! Wait, I didn't bite it so hard! UNFAIR! / Mike: [[off-panel]] Hi, Pa! / Roger: [[off-panel]] Oooh-hey, hi, Mr. G! / Harry: [[thinking]] We're gonna need a bigger VODKA.
http://crfh.net/d/20060519.html
 
College Roomies from Hell!!! - May 22, 2006 [[Were-Roger and Dave are arguing in the pool]] / Mike: [[off-panel]] Uh, Paul, it's not a good time right now... / Paul: [[off-panel]] Gee, sorry, I still have to get my money! / Mike: [[off-panel]] Look, I'll give you your money. Later, okay? / Paul: [[off-panel]] Sure, why not? Hey, if you're interested in something, I can give you a freebie! / Mike: [[off-panel]] Uhhh... hey look, the buffet's open! / Dave: [[eyes glowing]] Roger, BACK OFF! I mean it! / Roger: Oh yeah, you're a great guy. First you bite my girlfriend's boobs, then you zap me like the big coward you are. / Dave: Whatever! It's not like I shagged her in the woods or something! / Roger: This... is NOT relevant. Besides, she was never your girlfriend! / Dave: She was OFF-LIMITS, man! You know it, I know it, everybody knows it! / Roger: Somebody forgot to tell her, app- / [[Dave vanishes, leaving only a series of ripples]] / <> / Roger: arently... uh... / Mike: Dude. I didn't know Dave's mutant powers included teleportation.
http://crfh.net/d/20060522.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - May 26, 2006 [[Dave, dripping from the pool, enters the buffet and approaches the greeter.]] / Dave: Good morning, female human! I'm Dave, the devourer of worlds! Now take me to your food! / Greeter: Uh, no. Sorry, you can't go in. / Dave: Aaw, DENIED! / Greeter: Yes. I'm sorry. / Dave: Why? Have I been blacklisted or something? / Greeter: No, sir. People in swimsuits are not allowed past this point. / Dave: But these are my regular clothes. / Greeter: Well, you're all wet. And we're avoiding puddles that lead to- / [[Dave is suddenly wearing different -- dry -- clothes]] / Greeter: broken skulllllss and... lawsuits... / Dave: So yeah. Can I go inside NOW? / Greeter: What, what happened...? / Dave: Oh, it's not important. Buffet time. Like, in that Matrix movie?
http://crfh.net/d/20060526.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - May 31, 2006 [[April is waking up in her room at the resort.]] / <> / [[She stretches.]] / <<*cric cric cric-c*>> / [[A dirt-encrusted, mildewed hand reaches toward her]] / The Hand's Owner: [[off-panel]] Aaaapriiiil.... / April: <>
http://crfh.net/d/20060531.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - June 2, 2006 [[In April's room at the resort. April is confronted with a "zombified" version of her Imaginary Floating Wiser self.]] / April: Oh my God, oh my God. What, what ARE YOU? / Zombie April: It's meeeeee... don't you recogniiiize meeeee.... / April: You don't float, and you're not wiser. Please, please be imaginary... / Zombie April: Weee alllll flooooat down heeere, Apriiiil... / April: Stop. STOP. Are you one of those creepy japanese ghosts? / Zombie April: It iss meeee. Your... imaginaaary... crawling... zommmbieeee... BETTER... self. / April: Wh...? How, how can you be better than me? You don't look better at all... and stop talking like that, it's scary! / Zombie April: All right, I'll stop. Still. I'm better than you. Nicer, at least. / April: Why... what, you're a zombie? Are you dead? / Zombie April: I'm undead. And ROTTING. / April: Uh... / Zombie April: Rotting. Inside. YOU.
http://crfh.net/d/20060602.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - June 5, 2006 [[April is confronted with her Imaginary Crawling Zombie Better Self.]] / April: R-rotting? But I'm... I'm not that bad, am I? / Imaginary Crawling Zombie Better April: Well, still not kicking puppies. But CLOSE. Ever since the Devil put that thing inside your soul... / April: Lies. He never touched me. It has all been my choice. It has been me all along. / Imaginary Crawling Zombie Better April: I was alive before. Something killed me. / April: Nothing killed you. You just died because... you're stupid and mediocre and, nobody loves you. / Imaginary Crawling Zombie Better April: That's not true, April. If you were smart you'd know you will never get love this way. Feed me your brains, April. I'm starving! / April: Get away from me! You're ugly, you stink, and you don't even exist! / Imaginary Crawling Zombie Better April: Ugly, babe? You should really take a long look at yourself... / April: No! No! AAAGH! / [[April wakes up.]] / April: [[thinking]] AAAGH! Oh my God. Oh my God. Just a dream. Just a dream... / [[Marsha is standing beside her bed. Her eyes are baggy, her hair is seaweed. She's looked better]] / Marsha: Aaaaapriiiillll....
http://crfh.net/d/20060605.html
 
College Roomies from Hell!!! - June 7, 2006 [[In the girls' room at the resort. Marsha is in the bathroom.]] / April: [[thinking]] Jesus GOD, she looks terrible. I should do something, it's all my fault, I don't want any zombie better self haunting me... / April: Hey Marsha, you okay in there? Is... is there anything I can do to help you? / Marsha: [[off-panel]] Uh, yeah, I'm fine. Thanks. I just didn't get any sleep last night... / April: Well, maybe you should stay and rest, and... / [[Marsha comes out. Her hair is perfect. Sunglasses hide her eye-bags]] / Marsha: Nah. Nothing some industrial-strength hair styling gel and sunglasses can't fix. / Marsha: Here, you look a little bit dry. Try my watermelon chapstick. Catch! / [[April is in the bathroom with her scissors and bikini top.]] / April: [[thinking]] Someone needs help around here. / April: [[thinking]] And it's definitely ME.
http://crfh.net/d/20060607.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - June 9, 2006 Mike: I'll see you at the pool in a while, lovable *smooch* / Marsha: Right. I have a new bikini, so be warned. / Mike: Right, I'll be wearing some really loose trunks. / [[Mike and Roger head down the hallway.]] / Roger: Whatever, dude. You're not the boss of me, so next time I'm seeing him I'm smacking him a good one. / Mike: Roger, I'm trying to maintain the peace here. Besides, Dave trips on his own socks. Do you really think he would manage to achieve such a complicated maneuver on purpose? / Roger: Men go through unexpected lengths for boobies. / Mike: And because of them! Anyway, I hear you yakking and believe me, I... / [[Dave suddenly appears, his arms around their shoulders, with an enormous grin]] / Dave: [[to Roger]] You. Are. AWESOME. / Dave: [[to Mike]] And you? You are SOOOO AWESOME! / Mike: I know you are, but what am... Uh, wait. What? / Roger: It is time for sizable hysteria. / Mike: With lots and lots of wtf sprinkles.
http://crfh.net/d/20060609.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - June 12, 2006 Mike: Wow, is he possessed or something? / Roger: Possessed by what, the ghost of BARNEY??? / Dave: I'm not possessed, folks! Why shouldn't I be happy? The day is pretty, the birds are singing, the sun is shining! / Mike: You're happy??? Okay, now I'm freaking out. / Roger: Maybe a legion of smurf ghosts? / Dave: More importantly, my tank is full, and I'm off to the pool to watch bikinis until my eyes fall off! See you not, hopefully! / [[Dave leaves, poolward]] / Mike: This is very serious, Roger. / Roger: I know it's very serious, Mike. / Mike: We have to find out what the Hell's wrong with him. This is... this is an ABOMINATION. / Roger: I agree. I suggest we follow him and take note of all that suspicious bikini watching. / Mike: Dude, do you ever think with your *other* head? / Roger: Lemme think. Ummmm. Nope.
http://crfh.net/d/20060612.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - June 14, 2006 [[Poolside. Dave takes a running leap for the diving board]] / Roger and Mike: ???!!! / [[Dave leaps onto the board]] / [[...and springs]] / <> / [[Margaret is relaxing in the pool on a floating lounge]] / Dave: [[off-panel]] Last one to the pool is a soap humper! / [[Margaret is in the water. Her top floats nearby. Dave is head-first in the water]] / Margaret: I was TOLD this would happen. / Diane: Yup, TOLD YA! / Dave: <>
http://crfh.net/d/20060614.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - June 16, 2006 [[In the pool. Margaret resumes her bikini top]] / Dave: [[blushing]] I'm very sorry, I'm prone to embarrassing accidents! Uh, need some help...? / Margaret: Hum. You should be more careful. And anyway, weren't you just stuffing yourself at the buffet? Shouldn't you wait a while before going into the water? / Dave: Bah-pssch, that's just an old wives' t- IIIIIIGH! AAAGH! YEAAAARGH! / [[He clutches at his chest and writhes]] / Margaret: Dave! Dave, what's the matter? DAVE??? / Dave: Sorry! Heeeheeheeheeeheeeheeeheeeheee!!! *SNORT*
http://crfh.net/d/20060616.html
 
College Roomies from Hell!!! - June 21, 2006 [[Margaret and Dave are in the pool at the resort. Margaret looks annoyed]] / Dave: Pfffthehaheehe! I'm sorry, you looked so serious! Boy, you worry too much! What am I made of, wet tissue? HAHAHAH! / Dave: You worry so much, the day I actually die you're gonna feel relieved! HAHAHA! / [[Margaret raises a fist. Dave notices this]] / Dave: HAHAHahahahah / Dave: haha / Dave: ha / Dave: uh... / [[Margaret kisses him instead]] / Dave: mmph?
http://crfh.net/d/20060621.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! the daily online comic strip Margaret: Dave, I worry about you because I love you. Or am I not even allowed to do that? You worried about me constantly when YOU were in love with me, so turnabout is only fair play. / Dave: ... / Margaret: And although I can't expect you to return my feelings, can you at least not play with them? / [[Margaret paddles away, leaving Dave stammering at the air] / Dave: Uuh, uh, I didn't mean... uh... I was just... / [[Margaret gives Dave an atomic wedgie]] / Margaret: Also, you're a stupid JERK. / Dave: <>
http://crfh.net/d/20060623.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! Archives [[Roger and Dave are in the swimming pool. Dave is grimacing in pain, presumably extricating himself from a wedgie]] / Dave: Ghhh... whatta... way to kill... my buzz... / Roger: Dave, you're not supposed to tell women about their huge rack. You can think about it, but telling? Nuhuhuh! / Dave: Thank you... for the information. It's so UGH, valuable! / Roger: Yeah, I was kinda late on that. Next time I'll be sure to remind you on time. / Dave: Ffffwwwwhatever. / Roger: By the way, thanks for saying I'm awesome. I know I'm awesome, but it's always good to see someone acknowledging it. / Dave: Roger, you're not awesome. I was high on food. Even ANTHRAX seemed awesome at the time! / Roger: Aaaw. No one EVER thinks I'm awesome. / Dave: Doesn't DIANA think you're awesome? / Roger: Diana thinks algae is awesome. / Dave: Well, maybe it's because you can't stop talking about yourself when you see others in pain? / Roger: No, I'm sure it's just jealousy over the size of my johnson.
http://crfh.net/d/20060626.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - June 28, 2006 [[Poolside]] / Mike: All I'm saying is, all right, so Dave was freaking me out too, but do you have any IDEA how much whining I'll have to put up with for this? / Margaret: I fail at caring about your piece of mind, Suckerboy. / Mike: What's wrong with you people? Can't we have one single hour without an incident of some kind? / Margaret: Are you aware that you're the least indicate to give this lecture? / Mike: Wha, why? I'm being nice. I brought you all on vacation, and I have only strangled two people today. / Margaret: You're as nice as me, Mike. With that I say it all. / Mike: Hey, I'm trying here. But it seems like everybody is just... trying... to stir... / [[April sashays up, wearing not much.]] / April: Heeey heeey! How's the water? / Mike: Uuuh, wet?
http://crfh.net/d/20060628.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! - June 30, 2006 [[Poolside. April has just walked up in a very small bikini.]] / April: So yeah, how is it going? Woo! Is it me, or is it hot? / Mike: It's... definitely you. Feel free to take it all off, it's a private beach. / April: Hahah! Don't think so. I'll go lay in the sun over there, me thinks. / Mike: Aaaaw.... / Margaret: [[thinking]] *groooooan* / [[Marsha pokes some holes in Mike's chest]] / Marsha: YOU. / Marsha: and ME. / Marsha: need / Marsha: to / Marsha: TALK. / Mike: Thinking about PUPPIES, I SWEAR! / Margaret: [[off-panel]] Yeah, sweater puppies...
http://crfh.net/d/20060630.html
 
College Roomies from Hell!!! - July 3, 2006 [[Poolside]] / Marsha: You and I are going shopping RIGHT THIS MINUTE. / Mike: I didn't do it, wha... shopping, NOW??? / Marsha: Yes, shopping. My bikini doesn't fit, because I'm a frigging hippo, and so you're taking me to the hippo store to pick a new one! / Mike: But, but but! I'm so HAPPY here! I don't want to LEAVE! / Marsha: Save it, minion! Of course, it's either shopping or we can chat about the lustful looks you were giving to my slutonic roommate. / Mike: Uh I, uuuh... wait, isn't that TOM over there? / Marsha: WHERE WHO TOM WHERE??? I'm gonna kill his sorry f[[obscured]]g cheating ass! / Mike: [[off-panel]] FREE! I'm FREE! AHAHAHAHAHA! / <> / Marsha: What the...? Did he just run away? Just like that? / Margaret: Can't say I blame him. / Marsha: Well, GREAT! Now who's gonna take me shopping? / Margaret: Not me, certainly. But I have a one-piece you can borrow, if you want. / Marsha: No, I think I'll just find Mike, and then make a really nice bikini with his SKIN!
http://crfh.net/d/20060703.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! the daily online comic strip Diana: [[off-panel]] Hey Mike! Want to play frisbee? / Mike: No, thank you, I have to run for my life! Why don't you ask Roger? He's really good at it! / Roger: [[off-panel]] Just Good? Nobody EVER says I'm awesome! / Paul: [[off-panel]] You're awesome. / Roger: [[off-panel]] You don't count, Paul. / Paul: [[off-panel]] Awwww. / [[The top half of Mike's head is visible above the waves]] / Mike: [[thinking]] I only hope Marsha doesn't find me here. If I have to think of something uncompromising to say for another 100 bikinis I'll just have to pop my secret cyanide pill! / Mike: [[thinking]] Curse this waveless sea! Not only I can't surf, I'm also just too darn VISIBLE! / [[Mike floats on his back under the surface; just his nose is visible above water. A swimmer is just about to collide with him]] / Mike: [[thinking]] Much better. / Mike: [[thinking]] There are some advantages to having a medium-sized nose...
http://crfh.net/d/20060705.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! the daily online comic strip [[Dave and Mike are in the ocean. They each clutch their respective heads]] / Dave: Just my luck! The entire ocean, and I run into a head made of prestressed concrete! / Mike: Why don't YOU see where you're going, you idiot? / Dave: I was looking! You weren't there! / Mike: Well, I was hiding! / Dave: So was I. Now bug off! / Mike: No, I think we should stick together, as a defense strategy against evil women. / Dave: What KIND of defense strategy? / Mike: Well, you could take the bullet for me and go shopping with Marsha, and I could refrain myself from talking to Blue about you kissing Margaret! / Dave: Son of a...! Well, *I* could tell Marsha about you groping April! / Mike: It's a mexican standoff! Wait a second, I need to think of something better. / Dave: You also need a really big sea urchin up your ass.
http://crfh.net/d/20060707.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! the daily online comic strip Mike: Oh WAIT, I've got a good one. If you don't go shopping with Marsha, I'll tell Blue about your boobie cannibalism. / Dave: I'm sure that if I explained her everything she'd forgive me. So why don't you go visit the shark petting zoo? / Mike: Well uuuh eeeh ohh I KNOW! You OWE me, because I paid Paul to stop whipping you, and you destroyed my CELL PHONE! / Dave: Man, AGAIN with your stupid cell phone??? You know I can't pay for it! You can't make me your slave forever because of it! / Mike: Why NOT? Give me a good reason! After all, you're not even my friend! You said so yourself! / Dave: I'm not your friend because you own a stupid resort and I can't even afford food and yet you're such an ASS you're making me pay for your stupid cell phone! / Mike: Well, I wouldn't if it would have been an accident, but you broke it because you were acting like an idiot, so pay up or go shopping! / [[Dave's eyes begin to glow as he struggles for control]] / Dave: I HATE you so so SO SO MMmmmmGRRRRRRRR!!!!! / Mike: <> / Dave: ... / Dave: ... / Dave: Oooookaaay. You know what? I'll play your game. / Mike: Playing games with ME? Have you learned nothing? / Dave: Let's say I haven't. Tell you what, let's race to that buoy over there. If you win, I'll go shopping with Marsha. If *I* win, we'll forget about the cell phone. Deal? / Mike: Do you have "DUMB" tatooed on your ass, or what? I'm the one with a sea limb. / Dave: What, are you afraid? In that case... / Mike: I'm afraid that I'll laugh so hard I'll die from an aneurism. Let's GO.
http://crfh.net/d/20060711.html
College Roomies from Hell!!! the daily online comic strip [[Poolside. Margaret and Marsha enter; Marsha is wearing a one-piece swimsuit]] / Margaret: Psch, stop complaining. It's a GREAT swimsuit. / Marsha: *SIGH* Yeah, it is. / Margaret: Look, there's nothing wrong with the sporty look. / Marsha: Don't get me wrong... I really appreciate the help. And the swimsuit IS great. / Margaret: So, what's the big deal. / Marsha: Nothing. I'm just disappointed. It took me forever to find a bikini that looked good on me and hid my wings. / Margaret: Don't be ridiculous. You can't gain three pounds from a tiny bag of airline peanuts. / [[April is sitting beside the pool, barely wearing her tiny bikini. She's surrounded by men]] / Marsha: [[off-panel]] Well, it's not only that. It's just that everything's going wrong in this trip for me. Do you believe in karma? / Margaret: [[off-panel]] Sort of. Probably. Why? / Marsha: [[off-panel]] I guess you can say I'm feeling a little guilty. / Margaret: [[off-panel]] Guilty over what, April? / Marsha: [[off-panel]] Yeah, her. I mean, doesn't she look so pathetically desperate for attention? / Margaret: [[off-panel]] I dunno, I think she's actually having a good time. / Marsha: [[off-panel]] I sincerely hope so, because I feel like I haven't done a lot to help her. You know?
http://crfh.net/d/20060713.html
 

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