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| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Wednesday, October 16, 2002 | Mike: Well, I had no idea he would do such a stupid thing! It's not my fault!
/ April: Mike, we pushed him over the edge. And to think this wouldn't have happened if I didn't care so much about my damn fingernails...
/ Mike: Ugh. They are NICE fingernails...
/ April: Geez, Mike. Let me scratch your... http://crfh.net/d/20021016.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Thursday, October 17, 2002 | [[Mike, on crutches, interposes between Marsha, armed with a baseball bat, and April]]
/ Mike: But we were doing nothing! She was just scratching my hand!
/ Marsha: And you didn't want me to find out about THAT.
/ Mike: Not that! We were just talking! About, uh, kittens and puppies, and baby turtles...
/ Marsha:... http://crfh.net/d/20021017.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Friday, October 18, 2002 | Margaret: I don't know where they are. I haven't seen them since last night. My guess is that April is hiding somewhere.
/ Mike: Damn! Well, it's no surprise, really. I only hope they're okay and not in jail or something. / Mike: Anyway, I'm here to make a deal with you... since Marsha's on the loose... http://crfh.net/d/20021018.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Monday, October 21, 2002 | Mike: Hey, Roger, I was wondering...
/ Roger: Not now, Mike. I'm busy.
/ Mike: Doing what?
/ Roger: I'm classifying my popcorn in alphabetical order.
/ Mike: They should all be under "P", then.
/ Roger: Don't be silly. This one looks like Snoopy so it should be under "S". / Mike: Aaaanyway. I was thinking... http://crfh.net/d/20021021.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Tuesday, October 22, 2002 | [[Blue is on the phone]]
/ Blue: Well, bro, good luck. I think you ARE gonna need it. Maybe you can convince Mom you want drastic plastic surgery.
/ Mike: [[through phone]] And change my beautiful features? I'd rather die.
/ Blue: That's what I thought! Say, is the sexy green-eyed wonder around?
/ Mike:... http://crfh.net/d/20021022.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Wednesday, October 23, 2002 | Mike: Well? How did it go?
/ Roger: Marsha's location is unknown.
/ Mike: She called me on the phone a while ago to say she'll dance with 7-inch heels over my dead deceased corpse. So at least she's okay.
/ Roger: [[handing Mike a note]] Oh. I DID find April, tho. Here. / Mike: [[reading the note]]... http://crfh.net/d/20021023.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Thursday, October 24, 2002 | Mike: So, where else could he be? We got hospitals and jail covered. He's not at his folks' and he's got no money.
/ Roger: Maybe he joined the circus.
/ Mike: Maybe he's on a misery journey.
/ Roger: No, that's what YOU would do.
/ Roger: If you want to know what he'd do, you have to think like him and... http://crfh.net/d/20021024.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Friday, October 25, 2002 | Margaret: Well, I'm going home. I'll see you tomorrow.
/ Mike: Sure. Thanks, M...
/ Roger: Sing-o-gram for you, Mike. / Scully: There was a Mike, he had a horse, and Expresso was his name-o! And when this horse awakes he'll find... Mike's head in the hay-o! / Roger: Cool! That didn't rhyme at all!
/ Mike:... http://crfh.net/d/20021025.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Monday, October 28, 2002 | [[Mike, on crutches, encounters Steve and Waldo, both of whom are heavily bandaged]]
/ Mike: Hey Steve...
/ Steve: DAMN! Get away from me. I don't want to talk to any of you. We've HAD it with you guys.
/ Mike: Not exactly a pleasant experience for me either, but still... / Steve: You guys are NOTHING... http://crfh.net/d/20021028.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Tuesday, October 29, 2002 | [[Steve and Waldo retreat to safety]]
/ Steve: BWAHAHAHAH! I have to admit that from afar, it WAS very funny to watch that idiot dodge all the sharp steely death stuff!
/ Waldo: Yeah, talk about your animal magnetism...
/ Steve: What a loser! Why doesn't he call the cops on her?
/ Waldo: It's a shame we... http://crfh.net/d/20021029.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Thursday, October 31, 2002 | [[Diana arrives home]]
/ Diana: Hey April! Roger gave me some notes for you... / Diana: [[spotting something off-panel]] AAARGH! OhmyGOD!
/ Paul: [[off-panel]] Geez, sis, don't you ever knock?
/ Diana: I'm sorry! Uh, forget I saw anything! You guys keep on whatever you're doing! / [[What they're doing:... http://crfh.net/d/20021031.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Friday, November 1, 2002 | Professor Dover: [[writing a formula on the blackboard]] So, once we have this, how do we find the minimum area? People?
/ Dover: Mike? / Mike: Well, we need to differentiate the top surface area, and... um...
/ [[Mike notices a red spot of light on his chest]] / [[Margaret, in shades, shoves Mike bodily... http://crfh.net/d/20021101.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Saturday, November 2, 2002 | [[Mike is lying on his back on the couch]]
/ Mike: Worst. Week. EVER.
/ Roger: It wasn't so bad. After all, Diana and I went to...
/ Mike: I meant for ME! I broke my leg, my girlfriend is trying to kill me and my slave vanished!
/ Roger: I heard if you treat your roommates to pizza the bad luck leprechauns... http://crfh.net/d/20021102.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Sunday, November 3, 2002 | Blue: Hey! What happened to your leg?
/ Mike: I dunno. I was stoned.
/ Blue: Again??? Why didn't you tell me?
/ Mike: I don't want Mom to find out.
/ Blue: Ah! Thanks for your trust. Where's Dave?
/ Mike: I told you, he's not here. He is... He went home for a few days. / Blue: AHA. You must think... http://crfh.net/d/20021103.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Monday, November 4, 2002 | Mike: [[looking in his palm]] I keep thinking that something has fundamentally changed...
/ Blue: Heh! I don't think you'll ever change, for better or for worse.
/ Mike: No, no. I don't think *I* have changed. It's more like something inside of me has been... cancelled.
/ Blue: Honestly, you look like... http://crfh.net/d/20021104.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Tuesday, November 5, 2002 | [[Roger pokes his head above the back of the sofa]]
/ Roger: Psst. Blue around?
/ Mike: Nope. She got up early and went off looking for Dave.
/ Roger: How about Margaret?
/ Mike: Taking a shower.
/ Roger: [[tossing him a note]] Catch.
/ Mike: [[catching it]] K. / Mike: [[reading the note]] Damnation nation.
/ Roger:... http://crfh.net/d/20021105.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Wednesday, November 6, 2002 | [[A rather disheveled Roger is standing in front of the couch.]]
/ Mike: What happened to you? Clown attack?
/ Roger: WORSE. Diana and I were at the mall, when Marsha attacked.
/ Mike: She attacked YOU? What the hell?
/ Roger: She wanted to make me tell her where April is by drowning me on the fountain.
/ Mike:... http://crfh.net/d/20021106.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Thursday, November 7, 2002 | Mike: [[on crutches, shouting through gritted teeth]] They... are going DOWN! They're going SO down they'll have to send postcards from Australia!
/ Blue: Who is going down and why?
/ Mike: Steve and Waldo! They videotaped Marsha attacking me, and now they're saying it was Marsha who beat them up!
/ Blue:... http://crfh.net/d/20021107.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Friday, November 8, 2002 | [[April returns to the apartment. She has a scarf around her head.]]
/ April: I heard about Marsha...
/ Margaret: Yeah, I guess it's safe for you to come out now... heeeheeheeh! What's with the granny scarf?
/ April: If I take it off you're gonna laugh at me.
/ Margaret: All right, I promise I won't.
/ April:... http://crfh.net/d/20021108.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Saturday, November 9, 2002 | [[Mike chides Blue, who is on the verge of tears]]
/ Mike: Just where the HELL have you been??? It's almost midnight! I was about to call the police! / [[Blue sits on the couch]]
/ Blue: How could you?
/ Mike: Uh?
/ Blue: You didn't tell me he was at the hospital.
/ Mike: [[putting a comforting arm on... http://crfh.net/d/20021109.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Sunday, November 10, 2002 | Nurse: For now, we can only allow one of you in. Keep it brief, please. / [[Roger, April (with headscarf), Blue, and Mike (on crutches) all look toward Margaret]] / Margaret: Why is everybody looking at me?
/ Blue: Don't play stupid and get in there.
/ Margaret: Why? I'm the baddie of the movie, remember?
/ Blue:... http://crfh.net/d/20021110.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Monday, November 11, 2002 | [[Margaret sits beside a hospital bed. Dave, in the bed, has bandages around his head, all his limbs in plaster, he's in traction and he's on a drip.]]
/ Dave: UUUGGGHpain...
/ Margaret: My God, Dave, what happened to you???
/ Dave: Just... call me Humpty...
/ Margaret: Everybody's been looking for you... http://crfh.net/d/20021111.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Tuesday, November 12, 2002 | Dave: Why are you here... anyway? You don't have to... pretend you care about me...
/ Margaret: Don't say that. I'm not pretending. It's just that I... oh darn, I never know how to make people feel better...
/ Dave: Um, yeah. Now, listen... / Dave: I don't want to be rude or anything... but I really... http://crfh.net/d/20021112.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Wednesday, November 13, 2002 | [[Blue is at the side of Dave's hospital bed]]
/ Blue: I came yesterday, but they didn't let me in.
/ Dave: It was probably for the best.
/ Blue: I knew you were bad, but I couldn't even imagine. God...
/ Dave: At least I'm alive, right? There's no need to be so dramatic... / Blue: [[burying her face... http://crfh.net/d/20021113.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Thursday, November 14, 2002 | [[Our favorite roomies are standing around the hospital, bickering]]
/ Roger: Do you guys have any idea of how COMMON a name like "David Jones" is? It's not my fault! And he matched the description! So how was I supposed to know?
/ Margaret: All that guilt spent on an idiot who was run over by a truck... http://crfh.net/d/20021114.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Friday, November 15, 2002 | [[Blue confronts her mother, who is in the tub]]
/ Blue: Where IS he, Ma?
/ Hazel: Where is who?
/ Blue: You know who! Don't play innocent with me!
/ Hazel: I don't know what you're talking about.
/ Blue: You DO, too!
/ Hazel: My rubber ducky and I are sharing some quality time, so if you don't mind...
/ Blue:... http://crfh.net/d/20021115.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Saturday, November 16, 2002 | Hazel: Look, you're interrupting my bath. If you're going to start tossing random accusations at me, you better start from the beginning.
/ Blue: Why don't you just admit it? And you promised me you wouldn't hurt him if my eyesight turned out right.
/ Hazel: OOOOh. But did I really say that? I only... http://crfh.net/d/20021116.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Sunday, November 17, 2002 | Blue: Mom, please let him go. I'll do anything.
/ Hazel: Let's suppose for a minute that I *do* have him... would you convince Mike to spend his spring break here?
/ Blue: WHAT?? I can't do that! I mean, I could TRY, but... / Hazel: You know what I like about my rubber ducky? The way it squeaks when... http://crfh.net/d/20021117.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Monday, November 18, 2002 | [[Blue storms out of her mother's bathroom]]
/ Thadeus: I told you that it was better to wait until Madam was...
/ Blue: With all due respect, Thad, Madam can wear a screwdriver for a hat and TWIST! / [[Thadeus opens the door to the bathroom]]
/ Thadeus: Did you call, Madam?
/ Hazel: [[off-panel]] No.
/ Thadeus:... http://crfh.net/d/20021118.html |
| College Roomies from Hell!!! for Tuesday, November 19, 2002 | [[The Green Mother is no longer in her bath. Dressed once again, she strides onward...]]
/ Hazel: It's very simple. If she thinks I kidnapped her little friend, she'll stop worrying about it. I don't want her finding out who was really responsible for it.
/ Thadeus: Young Master Michael?
/ Hazel: Exactly.... http://crfh.net/d/20021119.html |
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