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| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer walking down a cubicle aisle]]
/ Ebenezer: Snooch? Where'd you run off to? Blast, I hope he hasn't gotten himself stuck in an air duct or anything.
/ Ebenezer: ...Again. / [[Ebenezer running to the end of a cubicle aisle]]
/ Snooch (offscreen): WAAAIIIEEEEEEAAHHH!
/ Ebenezer: Great Scott!... http://twolumps.net/d/20050214.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer walking down a cubicle aisle]]
/ Ebenezer: Snooch? Where'd you run off to? Blast, I hope he hasn't gotten himself stuck in an air duct or anything.
/ Ebenezer: ...Again. / [[Ebenezer running to the end of a cubicle aisle]]
/ Snooch (offscreen): WAAAIIIEEEEEEAAHHH!
/ Ebenezer: Great Scott!... http://twolumps.net/d/20050214.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer sitting next to a desk. Snooch's tail is visible hanging down from the desk.]]
/ Snooch: A bird! Gettit gettit gettit!
/ Ebenezer: It's sitting on an open desk, you doofus. Somehow I doubt it's a live avian, just leave it... / [[Ebenezer sitting next to a desk. Snooch's tail is visible hanging... http://twolumps.net/d/20050216.html |
| Two Lumps | {{Background--Ebenezer and Snooch have accidentally been taken to Mom's workplace and have been exploring it}}
/ [[Ebenezer and Snooch are peering through a doorway]]
/ Ebenezer: Okay, we've found Mom's cube again. Now we just have to keep low until she comes back.
/ Snooch: But we're on the floor! We can't... http://twolumps.net/d/20050218.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Eben is outside of Mom's cubicle at work, Snooch is off panel inside the cubicle]]
/ Snooch: RAR!!! AAAAH! THE ALLIGATOR IS AFTER ME! RARRRR!!!! AAAAH!
/ Ebenezer: For the last time, Snooch, THAT IS NOT AN ALLIGATOR! Now be quiet! / [[Snooch's paw pushes a staple remover out of the cubicle towards... http://twolumps.net/d/20050221.html |
| Two Lumps | {{Background--Ebenezer and Snooch have been accidentally taken to Moms office}}
/ [[Ebenezer is sitting in a doorway, Snooch is off panel]]
/ Snooch: Hey Eben! This chair's all spinny!
/ Ebenezer: For Bast's sake, just leave it alone! We only have to stay hidden for a few more minutes until Mom gets back,... http://twolumps.net/d/20050223.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer sitting in front of the couch, tail twitching in annoyance as Mom sets Snooch down]]
/ Mom: Whew. I don't know how you guys got to the office with me...
/ Snooch: Yay! Home at last!
/ Ebenezer: For once I agree. That was an adventure I'm loath to repeat. / [[Snooch looks happily upwards, remembering... http://twolumps.net/d/20050225.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer watching television, Snooch sitting with his eyes bugged out]]
/ Snooch: WHAT'S WRONG WHAT'S WRONG WHAT'S WRONG?!?
/ Ebenezer: What the deuce are you babbling about?
/ Snooch: All the howling! Are we on fire? / [[Ebenezer in front of the television with his fur ruffled]]
/ Ebenezer: It's OPERA,... http://twolumps.net/d/20050228.html |
| Two Lumps | 1st panel:
/ [[Ebenezer sitting on the kitchen floor]] / Snooch< http://twolumps.net/d/20050302.html |
| Two Lumps | {{All of Snooch's dialogue is in superscript captions}}
/ [[Extreme close-up of Snooch, whose grin appears to stretch off his face]]
/ Snooch: I LIKE PIE!!! / [[Edited photo of the Moon, with Snooch apparently floating across/clawing his way up it]]
/ Snooch: I LIKE PIE!!! / [[Photo of the Sphinx, with... http://twolumps.net/d/20050304.html |
| Two Lumps | {{All of Snooch's dialogue is in superscript captions}}
/ [[Extreme close-up of Snooch, whose grin appears to stretch off his face]]
/ Snooch: I LIKE PIE!!! / [[Edited photo of the Moon, with Snooch apparently floating across/clawing his way up it]]
/ Snooch: I LIKE PIE!!! / [[Photo of the Sphinx, with... http://twolumps.net/d/20050304.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Eben looks agitated]]
/ Eben: SNOOCH! Front and center! / [[Snooch enters, oblivious]]
/ Snooch: Word!
/ Eben: I told you to fetch me a grande mocha latte with whipped cream and nutmeg. Do you recall? / Snooch: Oh! Yeah.. that thingy...
/ Eben: But this is not a grande mocha latte with whipped... http://twolumps.net/d/20050307.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer sitting by himself, looking annoyed.]]
/ In background: < http://twolumps.net/d/20050309.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer and Snooch are sitting, Snooch is wide-eyed and looks shocked]]
/ Snooch: Uh, Benny? I found a roach.
/ Ebenezer: Ugh. Welll, given the torrential rain we've been having, I'm not surprised one headed indoors. Did you kill it yet?
/ Snooch: Ummm, no...
/ Ebenezer: *sigh* That IS our job, as protectors... http://twolumps.net/d/20050311.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer and Snooch are still stunned after seeing huge roach in previous strip]]
/ Ebenezer: We've got to think of something before Mom sees the...
/ Mom off panel: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!! OMIGOD PHONE PHONE EXTERMINATOR NOW NOW NOW!
/ Ebenezer: ...roach. / [[Both cats and Mom are standing on a chair]]
/ Ebenezer:... http://twolumps.net/d/20050314.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer and Snooch are in front of television]]
/ Mom off panel: Holy... what is that SMELL? Guys, tell me you didn't leave a hairball under the couch again.
/ Ebenezer: Don't look at me. I thought it was the neighbors trying to cook again.
/ Snooch: I kinda LIKE IT! / [[Mom kneels in front of fireplace]]
/ Mom:... http://twolumps.net/d/20050316.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebeneezer, doing complex mathematical formulas in his head]] / [[Enter Snooch, wearing a top hat as Ebeneezer glares at him]]
/ Snooch: Vrei sa pleci dar nu, nu ma iei
/ Nu ma, nu ma iei, nu ma, nu ma, nu ma iei
/ Ebeneezer: Go away. / [[Ebeneezer starts thinking the next part of the song as a mathematical... http://twolumps.net/d/20050318.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Mom is holding a box marked uRobot.]]
/ Mom: Hey, guys! Guess what I got!
/ Snooch: That's a LOT of gooshyfood!
/ Ebenezer: I doubt it. / [[Mom holds out the uRobot, which looks just like a Roomba.]]
/ Mom: It's an automatic vacuum cleaner! It'll work while I do laundry, clean your catbox...
/ Snooch:... http://twolumps.net/d/20050321.html |
| Two Lumps | Snooch: Run for it, Benny!
/ Roomba: COMMENCE UNDER-FURNITURE SUBROUTINE
/ Ebenezer: DAMN IT! / Roomba: DANDER SOURCE TARGETED
/ Snooch: I think it's followin' your hair...
/ Ebenezer: GET OFF ME, YOU BEAST OF THE PIT!
/ Roomba: EXTERMINATE / Snooch: So maybe if we just stop shedding....
/ Ebenezer:... http://twolumps.net/d/20050323.html |
| Two Lumps | Snooch: Man... what are we gonna do?
/ Ebenezer: I think I see a power button on top of it... BANZAI!
/ Roomba: TARGET LOST. REACQUIRING. / Roomba: ERROR! ERROR 502!
/ Ebenezer: Whoa! Wow!
/ Snooch: GET 'EM, EBEN!
/ Roomba: IM SORRY I CANT DO THAT DAVE
/ Ebenezer: There's a whole control panel in here! / Snooch:... http://twolumps.net/d/20050325.html |
| Two Lumps | Roomba: SUSTENANCE OBJECTIVE COMPLETED, O MASTER.
/ Ebenezer: Excellent. You may go recharge yourself while I dine, steed.
/ Roomba: THANK YOU, EXCELLENCY. / Ebenezer: This is perfect. After dinner, I'll be able to launch Phase Two: the first step toward our eventual feline domination of the world.
/ Snooch:... http://twolumps.net/d/20050328.html |
| Two Lumps 20050330 | Ebenezer: Many scientists argue about the concept of the tachyon, a particle with an unmeasurable mass that can move faster than light. / Ebeneezer: The great ymytery of the tachyon principle is that the more energy a tachyon expends, the faster it accelerates. / Mom: What the... who got into the leftover... http://twolumps.net/d/20050330.html |
| Two Lumps | {{The entire comic has been flipped upside down}}
/ [[Snooch runs up to Ebeneezer, who is sitting in front of the couch]]
/ Snooch: MAY DAY! MAY DAY!
/ Ebeneezer: What is it? Are we under attack? / [[Snooch sits next to Ebeneezer, looking pleased with himself]]
/ Snooch: No, that's what you're supposed... http://twolumps.net/d/20050401.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer and Snooch ar looking up at a plate of food on a table]]
/ Snooch: Oooooooooooooooooooo!
/ Ebenezer: Snooch, you know better than that. That's mom's food. / [[Snooch is now sitting on the table looming over the plate]]
/ Snooch: But they're right here! And unguarded! And gooshy! I can't resist!
/ Ebenezer:... http://twolumps.net/d/20050404.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer is inside a covered litter tray]]
/ Ebenezer: What the... Snooch, go get Mom! Quick!
/ Snooch: What up, homie?
/ Ebenezer: I was feeling ill earlier and ate some grass. It's a time-honored cat medication technique. / Snooch: But we live in an apartment. No grass here!
/ Ebenezer: Well, what I... http://twolumps.net/d/20050406.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Eben and Snooch look up at Mom]] / [[Eben and Snooch look up at Mom]] / Mom: WHAT? What do you furbags WANT?
/ Snooch: Time?
/ Ebenezer: *sigh* Less than sixty seconds. You win.
/ Snooch: YAY! http://twolumps.net/d/20050408.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Snooch is lying down, looking sad. Eben sits next to him]]
/ Ebenezer: What's up, Tons O' Fun?
/ Snooch: The world is a cold, cruel place, Benny. / Ebenezer: I don't think I've ever seen you depressed before. What happened?
/ Snooch: The glass is not half full. It is not half empty. The glass... http://twolumps.net/d/20050411.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer and Snooch are looking at a new litterbox which Mom has placed on the floor]]
/ Mom: Check this out, guys! It's an automatic self-cleaning litterbox. Now you don't have to worry about it getting dirty.
/ Snooch: Ooo, cool!
/ Ebenezer: Call me a kook, but robots make me edgy.
/ Mom: Now where'd... http://twolumps.net/d/20050413.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer and Snooch are looking at a new automatic litterbox]]
/ Snooch: I can't believe Mom bought an evil catbox!
/ Ebenezer: Good point. What're the odds of her buying a gadget that's randomly possessed?
/ Litterbox: WE ALL ARE. / Snooch: YOU CAN TALK!
/ Litterbox: OF COURSE I CAN. I'M A DEMON, YOU... http://twolumps.net/d/20050415.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer is talking to the new automatic litterbox, Snooch is off panel]]
/ Snooch: All done!
/ Ebenezer: Perfect. When Mom opens the door, it'll trip the wire and dump the bucket of water on you, shorting you out.
/ Litterbox demon: YES, THAT SHOULD DESTROY THE DEVICE THOROUGHLY ENOUGH TO FREE ME. THANK... http://twolumps.net/d/20050418.html |
| Two Lumps | [[Ebenezer and Snooch watch Mom walking by carrying a large bag labeled "all natural VENISOR cat food"]]
/ Mom: Hey guys, the vet said the commercial cat food might be what's making you fat, so I'm switching you to an all-natural diet.
/ Ebenezer: I am not fat. I am perfect.
/ Snooch: Ooooooo! TREATS! We... http://twolumps.net/d/20050420.html |
| Two Lumps | [[In Ebeneezer's fantasy, he sits on a raised dais with human skulls set on poles on either side, surrounded by prostrating humans]]
/ Ebeneezer: Finally, my long-awaited dreams of world domination have come to pass. / [[Something small and white - rose petals and confetti - starts raining down from... http://twolumps.net/d/20050422.html |
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