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| GPF Archive: Friday, May 20, 2005 | Sharon: Wow... I- I don't know what to say...
/ Alice: I know you've always wanted to know about your birth parents. But for some reason these records were difficult to find. / Alice: First we were told there were none. Then we found they were sealed. It's taken years to finally get them, but here they are!
/ Sharon: Oh, thank you, Mom! / Sharon: As much as I love you two, I've always wanted to learn about my real parents, to find out who they were and what they were like. Maybe even learn why they put me up for adoption... / Fooker: Maybe that "birthmark" is a branding form a secret government genetics lab...
/ Sharon: Maybe SOMEone isn't getting any genetic experiments later tonight... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050520.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, May 21, 2005 | Ki: Wow! This is a big moment for you, Sharon! Maybe we should leave you and your parents while you--
/ Sharon: Are you kidding? I'd love to have you guys here! / Sharon: Let's see... There's no info on my biological father. Oh, well. But here's my Mom's name! It's... It's... / [[silence as they concentrate intently on the page]] / Sharon: How DO you pronounce that?!
/ Nick: Don't dislocate your tongue... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050521.html |
| GPF Archive: Sunday, May 22, 2005 | Ki: Hey, Sharon! Thakns again for having us all over last night!
/ Sharon: Hm? Oh, no problem, Ki. / Ki: How did things go with your parents and Fooker after Nick and I left?
/ Sharon: They were only joking, but it WAS funny watching a former super spy sweat meeting his girlfriend's parents. / Ki: What's this? Doing research on your biological Mom?
/ Sharon: Well, trying to. I'm not being very successful. / Sharon: "Esther Matusevitch" doesn't SEEM like a very common name, but I figured at least SOMETHING would turn up. So far, I just keep hitting dead end after dead end. / Ki: Maybe it was your Mom's maiden name, or she used a false name.
/ Sharon: Could be. Since there's no mention of my Dad's name, anything is possible. / Ki: Heh, one hopes she's not a convicted felon! Hey! A result just popped up! Where are you now?
/ Sharon: The FBI's known fugitives page... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050522.html |
| GPF Archive: Monday, May 23, 2005 | Ki: Oh, Sharon! I didn't mean anything by that "convicted felon" crack...
/ Sharon: I know... I'm just shocked my Mom's name showed up in the FBI's database. / Ki: Does it say what she's accused of?
/ Sharon: I'm not sure. The public records don't seem very exhaustive. / Sharon: However, "Esther Matusevitch" looks like only one of many aliases this woman has used over the years. There's got to be twenty or more "AKA's" in this list. / Ki: It looks like your search just took an exponential leap in complexity...
/ Sharon: Assuming I'm even on the right path to begin with... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050523.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, May 24, 2005 | Sharon: No lunch with Nick?
/ Ki: He's having a lunch meeting with a client. How goes the Mom search? / Sharon: Well, using publicly available records, I managed to link a number of those aliases to a pattern of movement that does put "Esther" in the right city when I was born. / Sharon: I also managed to dig deeper at the FBI to show that she's been in the money laundering business for decades. And she's good at it: usually, when the Feds crack one scheme, she's already two steps ahead of them. / Ki: So NOW what are you going to do?
/ Sharon: Pull a few favors from my hacker friends, do some cracking myself, and solve this mystery once and for all. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050524.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, May 25, 2005 | [[Sharon typing at computer]]
/ Computer: smurphy, herez those files u wanted me to cr@ck. what r they 4?
/ Sharon types: genealogy experiment. thanks, neo. / Sharon thinks: Hm... Looks like I was right. Whether or not she really IS my Mom, "Esther" has been one busy lady. If the FBI could legally subpoena these records, they'd have a field day. / Sharon thinks: However, cross-referencing all these sources, I DO see a few common threads. She's thorough at covering her tracks, but she seems to always link back to a Diederich Pharmaceuticals, even though the FBI dismissed that link. / Sharon on the phone: Hello, Dwayne? Sorry about the late notice, but I need to take a personal day tomorrow. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050525.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, May 26, 2005 | [[Scene: Diederich Pharmaceutical, office building, outside shot. Voices from within]]
/ Off-stage voice: May I help you?
/ Off-stage voice: I would like to see Ms. Elsbeth Diederich, please. / [[Now inside the office building]]
/ receptionist: Do you have an appointment?
/ Sharon: Er, no. However, I do have some very important-- / receptionist: Ms. Diederich is a very busy woman, Ma'am. If you do not have an appointment, then I suggest you--
/ < http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050526.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, May 27, 2005 | [[Anna's first appearance]]
/ [[Sharon is speaking with someone who Sharon thinks is Elsbeth. It is later revealed that Anna, who works for Elsbeth, is pretending to be Elsbeth.]]
/ "Elsbeth" [Anna]: Good morning. How may I help you, Miss...?
/ Sharon: Sharon Murphy. I'm looking for Elsbeth Diederich.
/ "Elsbeth" [Anna]: I am she. / "Elsbeth" [Anna]: Is something wrong, Miss Murphy?
/ Sharon: Er... No. I just expected someone much... older. / "Elsbeth" [Anna]: I became CEO of this company after my father passed away.
/ Sharon: I see. I have only one question: does the name Esther Matusevitch mean anything to you? / "Elsbeth" [Anna]: I'm afraid not. Should it?
/ Sharon: I suppose not. Apparently, I followed a wrong lead. Sorry to waste your time. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050527.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, May 28, 2005 | [[Sharon has left, and a shadow, apparently Esther Diederich/Matusevitch, is speaking with Anna]]
/ Esther: Excellent job, Anna.
/ Anna: Was that deception really necessary, Ms. Diederich... I mean, Ma'am? Was it really... HER? / Esther: Yes, Anna. It's her. And if she tracked me here even when the Feds gave up, she's smarter than I ever hoped.
/ Anna: Intelligence has alwlays been a trait in the women of your family. / Esther: Her father may have PLAYED dumb, but he was smarter than he looked. That rat...
/ Anna: What's the next step? If she found YOU, she could find-- / Esther: If they find each other, we'll deal with the consequences. Until then, we pull up roots and start over once again...
/ tag: To be continued... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050528.html |
| GPF Archive: Sunday, May 29, 2005 | I'm back. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050529.html |
| GPF Archive: Monday, May 30, 2005 | Welcome back Fooker! It's great to have you back at GPF. / It's great to be back, Chief. / I'm sorry it took so long. Our expansion was on track before a certain incident nearly jeopardized signing the contract. / What, "Wiley Wombat?" I told you what happened. / Anyway, that's all cleared up and we're back on schedule. I'm going to need the best sys admin around to keep things humming. / Good thing we've got the two best admins now. / So what's your first official act as the new lead sys admin? / Get me some strong black coffee. I've got some kernels to patch... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050530.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, May 31, 2005 | Okay gang, let me explain how the new work is going to progress... / In addition to her current space, were now renting the fourth floor. Sharon and Fooker will be setting up the network there over the next week. Fooker will then admin the new work while Sharon gets the pre-existing stuff. / I'm making Nick team lead for the newest project. Ki will take his place on our existing work, and Dexter will become Junior DBA to help offset Ki's new responsibilities. / Kewl! A promotion! / This is starting to sound like the original "Trek" movies. We're all commanders, captains and admirals with no ensigns to man the ship. / I'm getting to that. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050531.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, June 1, 2005 | To get things rolling, I'm hiring three new contractors. Like Dex when he started, they're right-to-hire, so I plan to bring them on full-time if they work out fine.
/ Luckily for us, regional telecoms just ended their infrastructure upgrade, so we can bring on people Fooker already knows. That will help ease them into our group.
/ The other two will arrive this afternoon. But I'll go ahead and introduce you to -- / Patty! / Oookay... maybe you guys have already met... / I am SO having fondue flashbacks right now... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050601.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, June 2, 2005 | I haven't assigned Patty to a team yet, but I'll handle that by tomorrow. Why don't want a few show her around why handle some paperwork? Dex, you seem to know Patty. Can you give her the grand tour? Dex? / C'mon, Patty. He'll be locked in that race condition for a few hours. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050602.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, June 3, 2005 | And this is the kitchen and break room. I think your office will be upstairs. Any questions? / Let's see... Ki, isn't it? About Dexter... he's not going to go all creepy stalker mode on me just because of one blind date, is he? / No, I think yet grew that a few years ago... I hope. You're not going to have a problem working with HIM, are you? / Not as long as he remembers what I told him at Fondue For You. There aren't any other cosmic coincidences that I need to watch out for, right? Dwayne's not hiring that Trish chick, is he? / God, I hope and pray not... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050603.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, June 4, 2005 | It's time for us to head out to GPF software. / I know. Just gathering a few last-minute things... / Are you sure this is wise? Will be working right among them. We can't hide our surveillance there. / It can't be helped. We MUST know the answer. / Barker didn't recognize us, but Murphy might. If she puts two and two together... / It's been almost 2 years. Time may be on our side. Come, Brother Timothy. Today, we fulfill the destiny of the brotherhood, and find out if Murphy truly is THE ONE... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050604.html |
| GPF Archive: Sunday, June 5, 2005 | Shar, can you give me more slack? You're not letting me clear this support beam. / Sorry. Next time Dwayne wants us to pull cable, tell him to pick a day when I'm not wearing a skirt. I'm not crawling around in that floor until I put on some jeans. I HAVE my modesty... / Hey, Ms. Modest. Is that a thong, or are you just not --? OW! / Excuse me. Are we interrupting something? / Yeah, just domestic violence. Sharon, this is Tim and Scott. They worked with me at Regional. / Hello. / Aren't these the two "stalkers" you told us about? / Yeah, but they're cool. They haven't followed me around for a while. They're mostly harmless. / You... look awfully familiar somehow... / It's the goatee. Everyone is wearing them these days. / Amen, beard brother. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050605.html |
| GPF Archive: Monday, June 6, 2005 | You're just in time to help us pull some cable. After we're done, we'll take you downstairs and get you acquainted with everyone else. Since Sharon and I already know the new floor plan, will split up and take one of you each. The four of us should get most of this done in a couple hours. Tim, go with Sharon. Scott, you're with me. / This is your chance. Don't forget the tests of the prophecy. / Say, I could go for some coffee before we get started... / Hm... I guess it wouldn't hurt if we hurry... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050606.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, June 7, 2005 | So you actually CHEW some coffee beans first, THEN wash them down with the brew? / It's an acquired taste. / I guess she passes the caffeine test... / While I've got a strong man with me, why don't you help me move some hardware upstairs? / Some of this equipment looks pretty old. / We keep some of these old machines around for clients with small requirements. Not everyone needs top-of-the-line hardware. / Betcha can't make a ten teraflop supercomputer out of this pile of junk... / The woman in me wonders why you'd make that challenge, but the geek in me says you're on. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050607.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, June 8, 2005 | ... Then it's just a matter of installing the right kernel to handle the distributed processing load. Got it? / I... think so. / Come on. Fooker and Scott are way ahead of us by now... / She can actually BUILD it, but it WAS rather inventive design... Now to get the other brothers to initiate the third test... / I'll get the doors if you'll push the cart. The elevator is just outside... / Sharon! Someone just sent Trent a virus and it's crippling our network! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050608.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, June 9, 2005 | Good grief, Trent! How many times do I have to tell you not to open spam anymore? / Just wait until I get my complementary flatscreen TV and PSP... / This thing is voracious! It's spreading like mad, clogging the LAN. Fortunately, most of the machines have the latest security patches, so infections are at a minimum. I'll just take your machine off the LAN until I can do a full scan and clean on it. / And how am I supposed to WORK then? / Do what you do 95% of the time: use your PHONE. Sorry, Tim. This takes priority. But it should only take a few minutes... / Mind if I... observe? / Not at all. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050609.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, June 10, 2005 | She's totally absorbed in her task, at one with the machine! And THAT looks like my next checklist item... I've never seen an editor like that... / What? Oh, sorry. I was deep in thought. This old thing, I wrote on a whim. I was never one for the whole of the VI/Emacs war. I never found an editor that did everything I wanted, so I wrote my own. And THERE, we're done! / She's passed every test... but one... / Now let's get back to... hello? What's this? http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050610.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, June 11, 2005 | It's some sort of the encrypted message... / Really? Where did it come from? / Knowing my luck, it's another virus. While I'm curious, I'll leave that nugget to investigate later. We've got cable to run. You coming, Tim? http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050611.html |
| GPF Archive: Sunday, June 12, 2005 | Scott: Hurry! Barker and Murphy went back downstairs for supplies. Did you administer the tests?
/ Tim: Well, yes...
/ Scott: And? And? / Tim: Er... You remember how Barker didn't exactly fail, but we couldn't say he passed either...?
/ Scott: Gah!
/ Patty: Gee, Scott. I didn't know you were a masochist... / Scott: Grr... How can this be? Only Barker and Murphy bear the skills to be The One! How could they both fail the tests?
/ Patty: Back on that "The One" train? / Tim: Could "thePR0PH3T" have been wrong about the tests? He did say the prophecy was buried deep in the usenet archives, much like the "Bible Code"...
/ Scott: He checked it thrice, and I verified it. / Tim: Then perhaps neither of them is The One! There was no time frame set in the prophecy...
/ Scott: No! I cannot be wrong! I know The One shall be found!
/ Patty: Um, guys? / Scott: I will not rest until I have proven either Barker or Murphy is--
/ Sharon: Is what? http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050612.html |
| GPF Archive: Monday, June 13, 2005 | Scott: Gah!
/ Sharon: Just what is going on here? / Sharon: There's something fishy about you two. I've had a weird vibe ever since you showed up.
/ Fooker: Besides, maniacal ranting is usually confined to non-business hours. / Sharon: I know I've seen you two before! But for some reason I can't place you, like you're from a distant past...
/ Fooker: Ever been to Nerdvana? Or the sci-fi con in Springfield? / Sharon: That's it! You're with the Brotherhood of the Twisted Pair!
/ Fooker: They are? I could have sworn they were from Code-a-holics Anonymous... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050613.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, June 14, 2005 | Sharon: Now I recognize you! Scott was the one they called "Zero One," and Tim was "One Zero." You both were there when I was "interrogated." / Fooker: Yeah... Now I remember Scott being there. I don't remember you though...
/ Tim: I-I was a newb when you were initiated. Another was One Zero before me. / Scott: We beg your forgiveness, my lady! Our treatment of both of you in the past was wrong, and if you'll let me explain, I will reveal all to you.
/ Sharon: Whatever. Just get back up. / Scott: I am not worthy to be in your presence...
/ Sharon: No, get up. I've already had one dork looking up my skirt today...
/ Fooker: Hey! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050614.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, June 15, 2005 | Scott: After the raid, the Brotherhood was fractured, with most following Greg, the "One One," but a few remained loyal to me. We have remained underground ever since. / Scott: Both fragments have been diligently seeking "The One," an uber hacker who will revolutionize the online world. The prophecy was discovered during a complex analysis of usenet's archives. / Scott: They believe we have been too radical in the search, looking for candidates that they would quickly dismiss. But we think we have found The One, or at least two of the most promising prospects.
/ Sharon: And who would that be? / Patty: This would be the point where meaningful glances are exchanged, revelations are dawned, and I get to say, "Well, Duh," right? Just checking... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050615.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, June 16, 2005 | Sharon: You seriously think one of the two of us is this "The One" you've been searching for?
/ Scott: You both possess the skills set forth by the prophecy. / Scott: We have quietly tested you each, Jason at Regional Telecom and Sharon today. But alas, I'm afraid our tests were... inconclusive.
/ Sharon: What do you mean? / Tim: "thePR0PH3T" found a series of tests to administer to candidates for "The One." While you each passed most of them, the last you didn't exactly match.
/ Sharon: Then I guess your tests are over. / Fooker: Not necessarily. What if, while analyzing usenet, this guy had a bug in his code?
/ Sharon: Fooker!
/ Fooker: Just trying to be helpful... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050616.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, June 17, 2005 | Scott: His calculations were verified by many others, including myself, but I suppose there could have been something we overlooked...
/ Fooker: Let's take a look at it then... / Sharon: Hold on a sec! Are you seriously planning on helping them? This is the Brotherhood we're talking about! You're "He Who Shall Not Be Named," remember? / Fooker: I know, I know... But I originally wanted to join these guys Fred--er, I slipped up. Besides, now I'm curious about this whole prophecy thing. This could be fun. / Sharon: And what exactly is your role in all this?
/ Patty: If you find out, I'd like to be the first to know... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050617.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, June 18, 2005 | Scott: I contacted "thePR0PH3T" and he is e-mailing you the code now. He says it is an honor to have you debug it for us.
/ Fooker: Here it is. / Fooker: Whew... this is pretty complex stuff...
/ Scott: Yes, it is. It must process all of the usenet archive, not just a portion, and in the original ASCII, not unicode. / Fooker: Well, he gets brownie points for obfuscated C code. Here's the problem: He's got a "count++" when he ought to use "++count". Right, Sharon?
/ Sharon: Yeah. All his counts are off by one. / Sharon: Heh... maybe that's the "one" you should be looking for...
/ Patty: That settles it. I officially like these two... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20050618.html |
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