You're browsing the archives of General Protection Fault.
You can search these comics too.
show: [ full transcriptions | abridged transcriptions | just the first line ]
| GPF Archive: Monday, February 12, 2001 | [[Dwayne, Fooker, Nick, and Trudy are at the courthouse. Dwayne looks especially glum.]]
/ {{Tagline: In the "green room"...}}
/ Dwayne: I can't believe this is happening! Fooker, can you explain yourself?
/ Fooker: Sorry, Chief. I couldn't help it. / [[ Dwayne looks at Fooker angrily. Trudy looks off to the side, surprised, and an exclamation point appears over her head. ]]
/ Dwayne: Why would you send that code to anyone?
/ Fooker: It was an accident. I meant to send it to a friend, and must have hit the mailing list instead. / [[Dwayne sits with his hand on his forehead. Trudy walks out of the room,; the others do not notice.]]
/ Dwayne: You should have deleted it in the first place...
/ Nick: The damage is done, Dwayne. Now all we can do is tell the truth. / [[Alex and Phil enter through the same doorway by which Trudy just left. Phil looks in her direction.]]
/ Dwayne: I'd rather have handed him over to them when I had the chance...
/ Fooker: Hey, we're getting free publicity! That's better than none, right?
/ Phil, softly: Oooh, baby.. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010212.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, February 13, 2001 | [[ Nick and Alex are in the foreground. Alex is wearing glasses with one red lens and one green lens. In the background, in all four panels, Fooker and Phil are fighting. ]] / Nick: Um... I'm Nick, with GPF. I'm a programmer.
/ Alex: Alex, from Ubersoft. Tech support.
/ [[ Fooker chokes Phil. ]] / Nick: Nice vest.
/ [[ Alex looks down at his vest. ]]
/ Alex: It's standard issue.
/ Nick: Ah.
/ [[ Phil grabs Fooker's face, dislodging his glasses. ]] / Alex: So... You guys get sued often?
/ Nick: First time.
/ Alex: Heh. Not me. Almost got sued a couple of weeks ago...
/ [[ Phil kick's Fooker's face. Both Fooker's and Phil's glasses fly off their faces. ]] / Nick: Aren't those glasses hard to see out of?
/ [[Alex points to his glasses.]]
/ Alex: Special prescription.
/ Nick: I see.
/ [[ Fooker and Phil appear to have fallen to the floor. Their legs and feet can be seen kicking and flailing. ]] http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010213.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, February 14, 2001 | [[BOSS]]
/ Ubersoft boss: So... Our paths cross once again, Miss Trueheart...
/ Trudy: Yes... I see Ubersoft has grown greatly since I left. You must be proud... / Ubersoft boss: Yes... But we could not have come as far without your... _expertise_...
/ Trudy: Or _your_ leadership. Your vile cunning is still the envy of all who read the Supervillains Newsletter.
/ Ubersoft boss: They still _print_ that? / [[BOSS]]
/ Trudy: Aww... And you still have those flaming letters following you around...
/ Ubersoft boss: They're more tolerable since I got them to spell something other that that... _other_ word... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010214.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, February 15, 2001 | Trudy: I can't let you destroy GPF.
/ Boss: Why? Your company poses a serious, albeit unexpected, threat. A mastermind of your caliber can rebuild with little effort. / Trudy: I *can't*. I need this company to survive ... for *now*. I have carefully laid plans that will soon be coming to fruition. This company will fall, but only when and if *I* say it does.
/ Boss: I see ... / Boss: I take it the army of super mutants didn't work out?
/ Trudy: Bad. Those geneticists had the evil genius of pocket lint. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010215.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, February 16, 2001 | {{Part of Ubersoft v. GPF Software story arc.}}
/ [[Trudy takes a box from the freezer.]]
/ Caption: That night...
/ Trudy (thinking): I can't let Ubersoft destroy GPF. It will ruin my plans. But with that evidence on Fooker's hard drive... / [[Trudy looks at the box: TV DINNER - Just Microwave!]]
/ Trudy: ahHA! / Fooker: I don't know what to do, Fred. I think Ubersoft has this trial locked tight...
/ Microwave on other side of wall: < http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010216.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, February 17, 2001 | [[The Boss of Ubersoft confronts the eversmiling Trudy. His floating letters of fire are present as usual.]]
/ Ubersoft Boss: YOU deleted the evidence from Barker's hard drive...!
/ Trudy: I can't help it if he plugs his computer into the same circuit as my microwave... / [[A close-up on the Boss's eyes? Sunglasses?]]
/ Ubersoft Boss: NEVER has anyone thwarted my corporate and legal juggernaut with such ease! Our carefully collected evidence, Barker's admited guilt... In one simple move! Your arrogance and audacity infuriates me beyond mortal comprehension! / [[Trudy begins to walk away. The fiery letters briefly spell out "Please?"]]
/ Ubersoft Boss: Marry me.
/ Trudy: For the last time, NO.
/ {{This comic is part of a crossover with Help Desk. Ubersoft v. GPF Software / The trial of the century...or maybe just next week.}} http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010217.html |
| GPF Archive: Monday, February 19, 2001 | Ki: So your uncle Wisebottom has another another funky invention to show us?
/ Nick: 'fraid so... / Nick: Every time we come over here, we end up becoming guinea pigs for his newest foul-up. Be prepared for the unexpected.
/ < http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010219.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, February 20, 2001 | Professor Wisebottom: Behold the virtual reality fractal explorer.
/ Nick, Fooker, Ki: Kewl. / Professor Wisebottom: While wearing these goggles, the user can "fly" through the infinite intricacies of magnetic fractals, Newton fractals, Mandelbrot sets, Julia sets... / Fooker: "Julia?" You've got babes in here? Plug me in! I wanna check out some fractal mountains... growl!
/ Professor Wisebottom: ?
/ Nick, Ki: ! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010220.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, February 21, 2001 | [[Inside Professor Wisebottom's lab]]
/ Wisebottom: While I admire your enthusiasm, Jason, there are no "babes" in the fractal explorer... only interesting mathematical phenomena.
/ Fooker: Shoot.
/ < http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010221.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, February 22, 2001 | Wisebottom: How do you like the VR fractal explorer, Jason?
/ Fooker: This is way kewl! I'm flying in what seems like a sea of colors... / Wisebottom: This is a close-up of the Mandelbrot set, discovered by Benoit Mandelbrot in 1977...
/ Fooker: Way to go, Mandelplot! / Fooker: Aw... isn't this little guy cute...
/ Wisebottom: Careful! It may bite!
/ Fractal: Yip! Yip! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010222.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, February 23, 2001 | Wisebottom: What you're looking at now is a Koch snowflake...
/ Fooker: Bor-ing...
/ Ki: This VR fractal explorer idea is kewl... / Fooker: Hey... This guy's pretty mean looking... Hey, stop that... Get away from me! Help! Help!
/ Nick: Uncle Wise!
/ Ki: ? / Wisebottom: It looks like he's being pursued by a Mandelbrot dragon!
/ Ki: We've got to do something!
/ Fooker: Halp! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010223.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, February 24, 2001 | [[Wisebottom's lab, Nick, Ki and Wisebottom are in the foreground, Fooker is running around in the background with a VR helmet on his head]]
/ Nick: Can you disconnect Fooker from the VR fractal explorer?
/ Wisebottom: No! The shock might fry his brain!
/ Fooker: Ahhhhhhhhh!! / [[Closeup of Ki, Wisebottom and Nick]]
/ Ki: Can't you change the fractal algorithm?
/ Wisebottom: It's locked itself in! I can't change it!
/ Fooker: Ahhhhhhhhh / [[Ki, Wisebottom and Nick in the foreground, Nick has 2 VR helmets in his hand and is looking determined, Fooker is still running around in the background]]
/ Nick: Then there's only one thing to do...
/ Fooker: Ahhhhhhhhh!!!
/ Narrator: To be continued!!! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010224.html |
| GPF Archive: Monday, February 26, 2001 | [[Inside the VR Fractal Explorer; Ki and Nick are floating above a purple mandelbrot swirl]]
/ Narrator: With Fooker trapped in Prof. Wisebottom's VR fractal explorer, Nick and Ki have no recourse but to go in after him...
/ Nick: We're in, Unk! / [[Ki and Nick floating above a blue mandelbrot swirl]]
/ Nick: We've traced him through the Mandelbrot set and 'round the Koch snowflake, but no sign of him yet...
/ Wisebottom {{by radio}}: I think I have a lock on him... / [[Ki and Nick floating above a yellow Mandelbrot swirl]]
/ Ki: I don't suppose the oddity of this situation has dawned on you, has it?
/ Nick: Yes... it's as if we were trapped in some bizarre comic strip... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010226.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, February 27, 2001 | [[Ki and Nick are searching through a sea of virtual fractals for Fooker.]]
/ Ki: We've searched everywhere in the fractal explorer, Prof, and we can't find Fooker!
/ Wisebottom: Don't say "everywhere," Ki! / Wisebottom: Fractals are endless and infinite! If we lose him now, he may be lost forever!
/ Nick: There he is! / [[Fooker is wrapped up by a tentacle. Nick and Ki are in shock.]]
/ Fooker: Uh, hi, guys! Wanna help me out here?
/ Ki, Nick: ! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010227.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, February 28, 2001 | [[Ki and Nick are trying to pull a fractal spiral off Fooker]]
/ Ki: We can't budge this fractal! Fooker, it looks like you're stuck for good!
/ Fooker: Well, if you gotta go, go virtual... / [[Nick turns aside and addresses his Uncle]]
/ Nick: Waitaminute! Uncle Wise!
/ Wisebottom: Yes, Nicholas?
/ Nick: I need to see if you can come up with something for me... / [[Fooker and Ki look apprehensively at something offscreen, while Nick has his back turned to it]]
/ Ki: Whatever it is... I hope you can hurry!
/ [[From offscreen]]
/ < http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010228.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, March 1, 2001 | Fooker: Ahk! It's that Mandelbrot dragon thing again!
/ Ki: Nick, whatever you're gonna do, you better do it fast!
/ Dragon:< http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010301.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, March 2, 2001 | [[In the office, removing the VR Fractal Explorer equipment]] / Ki: That was incredible, Nick! What did you do to that Mandelbrot dragon?
/ Nick: Simple fractal math, Ki. / Nick: Fractals such as the Mandelbrot set have "attractors," or points that values tend to gravitate toward. I just had Uncle Wise generate the nearest one, and the dragon was sucked into it. / Ki: Kewl...
/ Fooker: You think you can whip up one of those things that will work on women, Prof? http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010302.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, March 3, 2001 | [[Fooker's office]]
/ Fooker: Man, I'm glad all that VR fractal stuff is over. I felt like quite the wimp running from a computer simulation... / Fooker: Yipe! Run for it!
/ Nick: ? / Nick: You couldn't resist installing a fractal screen saver on Fooker's PC, could you?
/ Ki: Oooh, is that a Julia set?
/ [[Fooker screams in background]] http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010303.html |
| GPF Archive: Sunday, March 4, 2001 | [[Nick and Ki driving]] / Nick: Hey, look, Ki! there's a (ahem) fork in the road!
/ Ki: What?! / Ki: Don't tell me we're going to resort to using that tired old gag...
/ Nick: Well... / {{T-intersection in road shows "fork();"}}
/ Nick: ...Not exactly... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010304.html |
| GPF Archive: Monday, March 5, 2001 | Fred: What's that smell? Did you actually bathe?!
/ Fooker: Chuck next door is throwing a party. / Fooker: I'm gonna slide right in with my smooth style and charm the ladies. Look out, girls; The Fookinator is about to arrive! / Persephone: My word, Fred! What if he actually... breeds?!
/ Fred: Not to worry, my pet. We'll never have to worry about that unlikely event...
/ Fooker: Quiet, you. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010305.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, March 6, 2001 | [[Chuck's apartment, mid-party]] / Chuck: Yo, F-man! You ready to party 'til dawn?
/ Fooker: Or at least until the super calls the cops. / Fooker: You've got a mean party goin', my man. Hot food, cool drinks, swingin' music, and awesome babes... yet I feel a sense of foreboding... / Trudy: Hi there, boys!
/ Fooker: That would be the sense of foreboding, all right... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010306.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, March 7, 2001 | Fooker: Why'd you have to go inviting Trudy to the party? She's crazy!
/ Chuck: She's our neighbor. It's good relations. Plus, she's one hot number... / Fooker: She's evil, Chuck. I tell you, stay away from her...
/ Chuck: Nonsense, dude! What'd she do to rile you up? / Fooker: No, Chuck! Don't give into the dark side!
/ Trudy: //The Force is strong with this one...// http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010307.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, March 8, 2001 | Fooker: //Man... Chuck's getting a little too close to Trudy... I've tried to warn him, but he doesn't want to listen...// / Fooker: //Well, it may be too late for him, but at least I can salvage my evening... Look out ladies... Fooker is on the prowl!// / Woman: Spread the word, girls. Fooker is on the prowl...
/ Woman: So that's the gnawing build up of bile I feel...
/ Fooker: Hey! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010308.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, March 9, 2001 | [[Chuck's apartment, mid-party]]
/ {{Women slap Fooker}} / < http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010309.html |
| GPF Archive: Saturday, March 10, 2001 | [[Chuck's apartment, kitchen]] / Fooker: //Man... This really isn't my night... Trudy sinks her claws into Chuck, the ladies are all turning against me... think I'll just sit down for a bit...// / Fooker: Yipe!
/ Sharon: ? / Fooker: Please, nice lady, don't with the hurting, slapping thang...
/ Sharon: Let me guess... you must be Fooker... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010310.html |
| GPF Archive: Monday, March 12, 2001 | Fooker: Look, I'm not going to hit on you, really. I'm just looking for somewhere to grab a seat...
/ Sharon: Okay. / Fooker: Honest. My legs are tired, and all the other chairs are taken. That's the only reason I'm asking to sit in this seat.
/ Sharon: No problem. / Fooker: This is purely the resolution to relieving bodily stress of exhaustion due to expenditure of muscular tasks by the lower limb extremities...
/ Sharon: And this is purely my acknowledgment and approval to your aforementioned request. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010312.html |
| GPF Archive: Tuesday, March 13, 2001 | Sharon: So... you must be the infamous Fooker I keep hearing about.
/ Fooker: I see my reputation precedes me. How'd you know? / Sharon: Oh, the giant red welts on your cheek. That one woman must have turned her ring around when she slapped you, huh?
/ Fooker: I can count the number of facets on her diamond... / Fooker: Look, you're not going to go all ballistic on me, are you?
/ Sharon: Naw. You look beaten up enough. I'll just play with your mind psychologically. Those scars don't heal as quickly... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010313.html |
| GPF Archive: Wednesday, March 14, 2001 | Sharon: You work at GPF Software, right?
/ Fooker: Sys admin and lead programmer. Why do you ask? / Sharon: I work at Quantum-Net. We're your ISP. In fact, I'm the lead sys admin for your account.
/ Fooker: Wait a minute... / Fooker: You're drop-dead gorgeous, and you're a computer geek? You must be setting me up for something...
/ Sharon: Not really... except maybe an opportunity to ask me out... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010314.html |
| GPF Archive: Thursday, March 15, 2001 | Fooker: Forgive me for asking, but how did a bombshell like you turn out to be a computer geek?
/ Sharon: Oh, I'm no bombshell, that's for sure! / Sharon: Without my contacts, I'm blind as a bat. Two years ago, I weighed 250 pounds, until my doctor made me lose it all to control my diabetes. And this mane of hair is my roommate's doing. I can't do anything with it. / Fooker: Then I must say you're the prettiest blind, insulin-dependent, bad hair day victim I've ever met...
/ Sharon: Did I mention I'm allergic to dust, pollen, chocolate, and COBOL programs? http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010315.html |
| GPF Archive: Friday, March 16, 2001 | Fooker: Aw, c'mon... I bet you get asked out on thousands of dates...
/ Sharon: Bunches of first dates, but never a second. / Sharon: Most guys are intimidated that I know more about computers than they do. They brag about using Excel, then I talk about parsing Perl scripts, then I'm dumped at home. And if I start talking hardware, I can forget a goodnight kiss... / Fooker: Please, for the love of God, tell me you're available...
/ Sharon: Not only available, but just as desperate as you. The name's Sharon. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20010316.html |
Archive Page:
<< 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40
41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60
61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80
81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100
101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 >>