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General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 5-28-2010	TWOING / PANG / THWIP / ZING / POCK / SNAP http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100528.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip 5-31-2010	Narrator: We never found out who fired the stray shot. It doesn't really matter. / Narrator: The damage had already been done. There were consequences for our carelessness. / Narrator: Theodore Roosevelt once said to speak softly and carry a big stick. No one speaks more softly than Nick. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100531.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip 6-2-2010	Nick fires a rapid stream of rubber bands at the others, leaving them defeated in the hallway. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100602.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip	[[Ki peeps out of Trudy's office]] / [[She get scared when she sees Nick, carrying his self-made rubberband guns]] / [[Nick walks by without a notice]] / Ki: MAYBE... IT MIGHT BE SAFER TO STAY HERE FOR A FEW MORE HOURS... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100604.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip 6-7-2010	Dr. Cheng: Dexter, we finally got your lab results... / Dexter: Lay it on me, Dr. Cheng! / Dr. Cheng: I'll put it bluntly. This doesn't look good. / Dr. Cheng: I've warned you time and again that you need to lose weight. Your blood pressure, LDL, and triglycerides are up, your HDL is down and you're in danger of being classified a borderline diabetic. You're not exercising and you're not following the diet advice I keep giving you. / Dr. Cheng: Have you listened to anything I've said in the past four years? / Dexter: I cut out the three double quarter pounders for lunch! I'm down to just two now. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100607.html

GPF Archive: Wednesday, June 9, 2010	[[In Dr. Cheng's office]] / Dr. Cheng: Dexter, I can't help you if you won't help yourself. If a wake up call is what you need, then here is one... / Dr. Cheng: At the rate you're going, I wouldn't be surprised if you'll be on insulin within a year. Your kidneys are straining, and your heart is too. I think becoming a diabetic is inevitable now, but kidney failure or a heart attack may be in your future now. / Dr. Cheng: You need help, Dexter. You need to lose 100 pounds, quickly but safely. Obviously you can't do this on your own. If you won't listen to me, is there anyone you know who can motivate you and keep you on track? / [[At Sharon's door]] / Sharon: Oh, hi, Dex. I'm sorry, I wasn't expecting you. What can I do for you? http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100609.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip 6-11-2010	Dexter: I'm not... interrupting... am I? / Sharon: Nah. We were just getting ready to watch a movie. / Dexter: I... um, need your help, Sharon. It's kind of personal, and you're the only one that I could think of that would understand. / Sharon: I'll help any way I can. / Dexter: It's about... I mean, I know you used to... ya now... and how you... um, I need to start... I went to see the... I have to... oh, fudgecicles... / Dexter: Can we talk somewhere he won't be listening? / Sharon: It's a James Bond marathon. He can't help but critique. / Fooker: He may have class but nobody could survive a fall like that. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100611.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip 6-14-2010	Dexter: So I need to lose at least 100 pounds, but dieting and exercise have never come easy to me. Dr. Cheng said I needed to find someone to help me, and I immediately thought of you. / Dexter: I know that you lost all that weight to control your diabetes, and you've kept it off for years now. If you can do it, so can I. I just... it's so hard to get started... / Sharon: I'm honored you thought of me. And yes, it it hard to get started. It's not just a few rules to obey: It's a change of lifestyle. You can't expect miracles overnight. You have a lot of inertia to overcome. / Fooker: Ba-da-dum, ching! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100614.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip 6-16-2010	Sharon: I was in the same boat as you. I needed drastic measures. My old plan may not work for you, but it will give us a place to start and we can tailor it from there. / Sharon: First I want you to throw everything out of your pantry and fridge. We're going to start from scratch. You'll need to do some grocery shopping, and you're only going to buy items on the list I'll give you. / Sharon: Tomorrow at lunch, you and I are going to the gym I work out at. We'll get you a membership, and you'll pay for a full year up-front. Guilt is a great motivator. Then we'll make it a regular lunch-time gig, you and me. / Dexter: Won't he take objection with that, seeing as you and I once... um, you know... / Sharon: Are you kidding? He's too busy spending his lunch hour rewriting device drivers. / Fooker: I heard that. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100616.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 6-18-2010	Caption: The next day... / Sharon: Ready for our first trip to the gym, exercise buddy? / Dexter: As ready as I'll ever be. / Sharon: Did you have a nutritious breakfast? / Dexter: I had a bowl of cereal. Just corn flakes, no added sugar, and with skim milk even! / Sharon: OK... how big of a bowl? / Dexter: A... salad bowl. / Sharon: We are talking about an individual salad bowl and not a salad serving bowl, right? / Dexter: Um, let's hurry to the gym. Time's a wastin'! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100618.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 6-18-2010	Caption: The next day... / Sharon: Ready for our first trip to the gym, exercise buddy? / Dexter: As ready as I'll ever be. / Sharon: Did you have a nutritious breakfast? / Dexter: I had a bowl of cereal. Just corn flakes, no added sugar, and with skim milk even! / Sharon: OK... how big of a bowl? / Dexter: A... salad bowl. / Sharon: We are talking about an individual salad bowl and not a salad serving bowl, right? / Dexter: Um, let's hurry to the gym. Time's a wastin'! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100618.html

GPF Archive: Monday, June 21, 2010	[[Sharon brings food for Dexter and herself.]] / Sharon: One of the first steps to shedding those pounds is eating right. So I picked a nice, healthy lunch for us. / Sharon: You have to control both the quality and quantity of your portions. So here's a nice, fresh salad. / [[Dexter looks at his bowl of salad.]] / Dexter: Um, this is just the first course, right? http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100621.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip 6-23-2010	THUMP / THUMP / THUMP / THUMP / THUMP / THUMP / THUMP / THUMP / RUMBLE / Exercise Patron: EARTHQUAKE! / THUMP / THUMP / RUMBLE / CRASH / Sharon: Maybe running on the treadmill isn't for you, Dex... / Dexter: It snapped like a twig... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100623.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 6-25-2010	Sharon: I figured you'd do well with the weight machines, especially given the, um, rumble you had in New York years ago... / Sharon: But I think we may need to find a more effective method of lifting weights... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100625.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 6-25-2010	Sharon: I figured you'd do well with the weight machines, especially given the, um, rumble you had in New York years ago... / Sharon: But I think we may need to find a more effective method of lifting weights... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100625.html
GPF Archive: Monday, June 28, 2010	Sharon: Maybe we'll have better luck at the pool. You did bring your trunks, right? / Dexter: Yeah, but I'll probably displace all the water and flood the gym... / Sharon: Don't be so hard on yourself. We knew there would be challenges. We just didn't expect them to be so... large. Hold on a sec... / Sharon glares at Fooker. / Sharon: For a former secret agent, you're a lousy master of disguise. / Fooker: I fell asleep during the correspondence course. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100628.html
GPF Archive: Wednesday, June 30, 2010	Sharon: And just what, pray tell, are you doing? Applying for a gym membership? / Fooker: I was thinking of taking up? pilates. / [[Fooker takes his disguise off.]] / Sharon: Look, Dex needs some serious encouragement. This is hard for him. He doesn't need you following him here just to make fun of him. / Fooker: I'm not here to make fun of him! I followed you because I wanted to make sure you? that he didn't? that in case you needed? / [[Sharon smirks.]] / Sharon: You're jealous, aren't you? / Dexter: Wow, I've never seen him blush before? http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100630.html

GPF Archive: Friday, July 2, 2010	Fooker: Ok, yeah, I'm jealous. Wouldn't you be if I ran off with Ki or Trudy to "work out at the gym" during lunch? / Sharon: No, because I know and trust Ki and you wouldn't be caught dead in public alone with Trudy. / Sharon: Fooker, Dex and I are friends. We have some history, but it's just that: history. I'm your girlfriend, not his. He asked for my help, and as his friend, I'm going to give it to him. / Sharon: But I can understand your concern. You've got that macho testosterone-fueled "defend my territory" feeling to fight. So I've got the perfect way to remedy the situation... / Sharon: You're going to help me help Dex. / Dexter: Howdy, workout buddy! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100702.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 7-5-2010	Sharon: Boxing is definitely good exercise, but I think Fooker holding the bag wasn't a good idea... / Fooker (strained voice): I concur. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100705.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 7-7-2010	Fooker: I'm really impressed with Dex's progress. He's come a long way in a short while. / Sharon: I agree. He's shown excellent initiative. / Fooker: However, I think you're right; the weight machines will need a little work. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100707.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 7-9-2010	Sharon: Well, Fooker. Dex has lost 15 pounds so far. How do you think he's doing? / Fooker: Ix-nay on the ooker-Fay. The ban, remember? / Fooker: Awesome job, big guy. Ya did good. This is just the start, of course. But you've shown great initiative. / Dexter: Thanks... Um, you. / Sharon: The next few months are going to be hard. It takes a while to develop new habits and break old ones. But your friends are always ready to help. We'll get Nick, Ki, and the others on board too. / Dexter: Well, if we're celebrating, a couple slices shouldn't hurt. / Fooker: Sorry, skipper. Pizza's reserved for those of us with freakishly high metabolisms. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100709.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 7-12-2010	Patty: At the risk of dating myself further, is it much further Mama Smurf? / Ki: Yes it is, Patty. / Patty: Oh, goody. Another two hours. I can barely contain my excitement. / Ki: Look, exhibiting at this expo is important to Dwayne. I know it's a long haul, but making a presence there could mean big opportunities for us in the future. We need to put our best foot forward. / Patty: So naturally he sends all the employees that can't stand each other... / Dexter: I like Ki... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100712.html

General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 7-14-2010	Ki: Patty, you know we have that big deadline looming. Nick and the others can't get away. We each finished our work, so we're free to make the expo. / Ki: Besides, Dwayne picked us to go for our strengths. Trudy is our marketing director. Naturally, she needs to be there. / Trudy: Hmm? / Ki: Dex is our slave labor. None of us girls can carry all that stuff for the booth. / Dexter: Good thing I've been working out! / Patty: And you and I? / Dexter: Booth babes! / Ki: Darn, and I forgot to pack my bikini. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100714.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 7-16-2010	Ki: You and I are our tech reps for this trip, Patty. Nick's tied up, Fooker's not the most sociable, and Sharon's out sick. Everyone else is a contractor. / Dexter: But... she's a contractor too... / Dwayne: Hello, Patty. What's this? / Patty: It's my two weeks notice. I'm sorry to jump ship on you. But I've had another offer that's too good to pass up. / Dwayne: Well, I hate to see you go, but I understand. We'll miss you. / Patty (thinking): Not for much longer... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100716.html
GPF Archive: Monday, July 19, 2010	Ki: Patty may be a contractor, but she was instrumental in designing the Hersey's Barbecue project. Dwayne wants her to showcase that design at our booth. / Ki: Besides, I head she had a little talk with Dwayne the other day... / Dexter: Oh! Oh! Is he bringing you on full time? That would be awesome! / Ki: I hear Scott and Tim have already accepted. It's just a matter of paperwork now. / Patty: I'm sure Murphy will be thrilled to hear that. / Dexter: Well I'm thrilled. That means you'll have to start talking to me again! / Patty: Then I may have to reconsider. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100719.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 7-21-2010	Patty: What was that? Niemand, did you have something insightful and distracting to say? / (no dialogue) / (no dialogue) / Patty: Thanks for nothing, Trudy. / Dexter: You can sit next to me at the next ESOP meeting. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100721.html
GPF Archive: Friday, July 23, 2010	Trudy: Dwayne, I... don't think I can make this expo trip... / Dwayne: Why not? You're our marketing director. I need you there... / Trudy: There's this... relative, you see. There's some bad blood between us, and he lives there in town... / Dwayne: But that was another universe, remember? You're in our universe now, and you'll be going with several others. Besides, it's a big city. What are the odds you'll run into him? / Dwayne: I promise you'll be fine. Stick with Ki and I guarantee nothing bad will happen. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100723.html

GPF Archive: Monday, July 26, 2010	Ki: We're from GPF Software, booth #1296? / Desk clerk: Just sign in. Here's your exhibitor's packet. / Ki: We're all the way on the other side. Looks like we'll have to hoof it. / Patty: Naturally. / Ki: Have you finally decided to join us? / Trudy: Sorry, I've been distracted. I'll be on my game, I promise. / Patty: I thought you said you've been working out. / Dexter: Maybe... I need to... up my cardio... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100726.html
GPF Archive: Wednesday, July 28, 2010	Patty: Oof! What in the world is in this box? / Trudy: Excellent! They're the special "uniforms" I had made for us. Dwayne wanted us to have a consistent look for exhibiting, so we'll all get a set eventually. / Trudy: I had each one tailored specifically for us. Dwayne balked at the price at first, but I eventually talked him into it. / Patty: So why in the world do four lousy shirts weight that much? / Dexter: Oh! You got one for me too! http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100728.html
GPF Archive: Friday, July 30, 2010	Trudy: It's not just a shirt. It's a complete outfit. Matching shirts for all, slacks for Dex, skirts for us, and... / Patty: Now hold on... / Patty: Nobody said anything about wearing a skirt. Especially one that would be indecent on a Barbie doll. / Trudy: It's not that short. / Trudy: Look, Dwayne put me in charge of marketing. I know how to get people to our booth. I'll get them here and you sell them on your wizardry. You do your job and I'll do mine. / Patty: But... / Ki: Just put on the skirt Patty. / Dexter: Booth babes... http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100730.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip - 8-2-2010	Ki: That's the last of it. Are Dex and Patty still changing? The expo opens up in 15 minutes. / Trudy: Here's Dexter. / Ki: Dex, the shirt looks good on you, but you don't look so well. Are you feeling ok? / Dexter: Yeah. Just a bit... winded. Just gotta catch my breath. / Trudy: Well, sit down and take a rest. You're starting to leave sweat stains on that new shirt. / Patty: Fine. I'm wearing it. But I don't have to like it. / Ki: Well, it looks good on you. Just go with it for now and we'll bring it up with Dwayne later. / Patty: We'll see if Trudy pulls this again after I stop shaving my legs all weekend. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100802.html
General Protection Fault--The Comic Strip	[[The GPF booth at the exhibition]] / Patty: As much as it annoys me, you've got to admit she knows her stuff. We barely had a free moment since we opened. / Ki:For all our spats, I've NEVER disputed that. / Patty: And I've been asked out more times in the last hour than I have been in the last three years. Not that I'm interested... / Ki: A leggy blond in a short skirt? Big surprise... / Patty: Don't think I didn't notice that you've been flashing that wedding ring around in self defense... / Ki: You'd be surprised how many times it DOESN'T work. http://www.gpf-comics.com/d/20100804.html

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