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| Goats comic strip from May / 11 / 2006: the wound (8) | Where's the programmer? / I let him go. I'm teaching him a lesson. / / Toshi will be pissed. / He won't be gone long enough for Toshi to find out. / / I can't believe he fell for that! I'm a genius. Now all I have to do is cross this endless expanse of perfectly... http://www.goats.com/archive/060511.html |
| Goats comic strip from May / 15 / 2006: the wound (9) | Fabulous. I'm going to be torn apart by giant sand johnsons. / / Was this part of your intel!? Are these things going to stuff me full of trail mix until I die? / / Oh geez, I hope not. Those raisins are tiny land-mines of nasty. / / / / I could have taken care... http://www.goats.com/archive/060515.html |
| Goats comic strip from May / 16 / 2006: the wound (10) | What the hell were those things? / Those are the Middle-Aged Ones. They are ancient, hateful creatures who hide beneath the desert sands, where they lie in wait with their unemployed slacker children. / / The Middle-Aged Ones are highly resentful. They attack anything emitting... http://www.goats.com/archive/060516.html |
| Goats comic strip from May / 17 / 2006: the wound (11) | The worms were instrumental in shaping Middle Pagaean culture, you know. / You guys have culture? / / The ancient Pangaeans were little more than hairless monkeys, whiling away the days nestled deep within the saftey of a lush tropical paradise. / Awesome. / / But then came The Rupture. A local... http://www.goats.com/archive/060517.html |
| Goats comic strip from May / 18 / 2006: the wound (12) | The pan-dimensional infection spread quickly, laying waste to the entire level in a matter of hours. / / The self-satisfied Pangaeans were an ideal, delicious food source for the invading worms. / / Five thousand years of selective pressure against pride and ego battered them into a race of bitter, nervous,... http://www.goats.com/archive/060518.html |
| Goats comic strip from May / 22 / 2006: the wound (13) | It wasn't long before the Pangaeans convinced the worms to keep their distance. / / Do you see? Do you see what you've made me do?! I used to be a florist! And now look at me! / / I've betrayed the flowers. Flowers never use violence to solve... http://www.goats.com/archive/060522.html |
| Goats comic strip from May / 23 / 2006: the wound (14) | With access to an unlimited supply of weapons and an equally unlimited reserve of mistrust, the Pangaeans were quick to arm themselves. The Mexican standoff supplanted the handshake. / G'Day, Zeke, how have ya been? / I hate myself. / / The transition from existence as a food source to a society... http://www.goats.com/archive/060523.html |
| Goats comic strip from May / 24 / 2006: the wound (15) | So the Pangaeans just stand out there in the desert, isolated, watching for attackers and loathing themselves? / It's better than jury duty. / / How does anything get done? / There are occasional partnerships for tasks requiring more than one person, like making children or writing screenplays. It is very rare... http://www.goats.com/archive/060524.html |
| Goats comic strip from May / 25 / 2006: the wound (16) | Now that we've finished with your lesson, I think it's time for you to be back to work, aye? / I don't even know what I'm supposed to be doing. / / You've got an exposed weapons function right in front of ya, loopin' like a rollercoaster. All the raw ingredients needed to make an entire level of existence... http://www.goats.com/archive/060525.html |
| Goats comic strip from May / 30 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (1) | Roger! What happened to you? / Oliver is bored again. / / You had a full day of events scheduled! Let me see this. / / 9:00AM REVEILLE / 9:30AM BREAKFAST (slug eggs, slug muffins, slug juice) / 9:15AM SLUG WRESTLING / 10:30AM SLIMECRAFTING / 11:15AM MUSIC APPRECIATION / 12:00PM LUNCH (hot slime... http://www.goats.com/archive/060530.html |
| Goats comic strip from May / 31 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (2) | General Carl! Perimeter security reports that they have captured a stick-legged traveller en route from the Snedroff camp. / Stick-legged? Hmmm. / This is great! It'll give Oliver someone else to beat off for five minutes. / You mean "beat... http://www.goats.com/archive/060531.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 01 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (3) | I swear by the holy metal testicles of Optimus Prime, I will rearrange your eyeballs if you don't bring me a pack of smokes this instant.
/ / I don't know whaurk! / / Don't you be tellin' me you don't know what a cigarette... http://www.goats.com/archive/060601.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 05 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (4) | You're no hallucination. Oh, I've dreamed of this, to be certain. I've dreamed a thousand different vengeances against you and that goldfish. / / But you're certainly no hallucination of mine. / Maybe I'm someone else's hallucination. Or maybe... http://www.goats.com/archive/060605.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 06 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (5) | Can one of you guys go get me a sharpened stick, or a femur maybe? Anything good for disemboweling. / You can't disembowel me! / / Sure I can. It ain't fancy, but it drips with old-school appeal. / Don't you want to know why I'm here? / / You were captured by the slugs. It's pretty straightforward. / I... http://www.goats.com/archive/060606.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 07 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (6) | Why would you wanna help me kill Fineas? I thought you guys was butt buddies. / / No one is buddies with my butt, young man! My butt is buddyless. My butt is the Lone Frickin' Ranger. I'm helping you because I love you. / Ew. / Like... http://www.goats.com/archive/060607.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 08 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (7) | Wait just one second. If Fineas is here, that means the transport robot is here. / We could use it to get back home! / Or at least somewhere that doesn't smell like poop tumors all the time. / / WHERE IS THE ROBOT? / I don't... http://www.goats.com/archive/060608.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 12 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (8) | I'm comin' for you, you cyborg freak! You'd better finish up that super-weapon real quick! / / That's it nimrod. Come on in! The doom is fine! / / Flen, begin Operation Death Blossom. / Does that mean lunch? / No. It's not lunch. http://www.goats.com/archive/060612.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 13 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (9) | Yoink! / / It's a trap! / / Roger! Throw it in reverse! / / Is this the gearshift? / No, but don't stop. That feels nice. http://www.goats.com/archive/060613.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 14 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (10) | We're surrounded! / They've got us penned in like veal. / What is a veal? / It's a sort of delicious baby cow in a box. / / Hey beard guy! Make like Jim Morrison and break on through. / That may not be such a good idea. / / You've betrayed me again. / Well, maybe a... http://www.goats.com/archive/060614.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 15 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (11) | What the hell is that? / It's a giant spear. / / Wrong, amigos. That's a custom-made Snedroff Industries Large-Bore Megashafted Lance-Style Destructospear, Mark Two. The first one gave its life driving a test melon ninety feet down into the planetary crust. / / This... http://www.goats.com/archive/060615.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 19 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (12) | If I had two good hands I'd climb up there and stuff your gills full of your spinal cord. / / I wouldn't make any sudden moves, Oliver. Flen can bring the Destructospear down on your heads with one hard yank. / Heh heh. / Shut up! / / I'm not afraid of your sub-par superweapon.... http://www.goats.com/archive/060619.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 20 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (13) | Either kill us or let us go. / Yeah. It's the waiting I can't stand. / / This doesn't have to end in violence. Just hand over Oliver and I'll let the rest of you go. Hell, I'll even throw in a case of Omaha steaks. What's your shipping address? / / No... http://www.goats.com/archive/060620.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 21 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (14) | Fwip! / / Climb, you bastards! / / We can't climb. No feet! / Thanks a lot, intelligent design. http://www.goats.com/archive/060621.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 22 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (15) | Argh! Grah! / / What are you doing? You could have killed Oliver! / He's fine. Besides, no one would have missed him. / / We need Oliver to tell us where Phillip is so we can save the Universe and stuff! Did you forget? / / I took a calculated risk. It paid off.... http://www.goats.com/archive/060622.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 26 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (16) | Yeeeargh! / / / Raugh!! http://www.goats.com/archive/060626.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 27 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (17) | I can smell my eye!! / / / Did you have a nice voyage? / See you next Autumn! http://www.goats.com/archive/060627.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 28 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (18) | Ah crap. Now I'm gonna have to get me some new henchmen. / You saved me! / So? / / That proves that you love me! Like a father. / I saved you because you have some value to me as a hostage. / / Are you joking? Fineas just tried to kill me. I'm the most worthless hostage since Ann Coulter. / / Fine.... http://www.goats.com/archive/060628.html |
| Goats comic strip from June / 29 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (19) | Aw jeez. Last time my head hurt this bad was after I went on that Ayn Rand binge junior year. / Objectivism isn't very useful when you're stuck at the bottom of a hole. / / And covered in purple goop. / That's not goop, that's slugs. Looks like they pulped when we landed on 'em. / / I think this... http://www.goats.com/archive/060629.html |
| Goats comic strip from July / 04 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (20) | Talk about a dive bar. / I'm guessing they didn't do much business ninety feet under the surface of a world peopled with giant slugs. Hold still. / / YEAARGH!! / / Can you see? How many fingers am I holding up? / That's a matter of debate. / / The real question is, why is this bar... http://www.goats.com/archive/060704.html |
| Goats comic strip from July / 05 / 2006: battle of the network slugs (21) | Flen, send out two search parties, north and south along the canyon. Oliver couldn't have gotten that far. / Don't tell me what I can't do! / / I bet you can't tell me where Phillip is. / Dont you try your dirty-dealing psychological tricks on me. You want your friend's location? You give me the robot. / / So... http://www.goats.com/archive/060705.html |
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