You're browsing the archives of Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan.
You can search these comics too.

show: [ full transcriptions | abridged transcriptions | just the first line ]

Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: FLAP [[Krakatoa shuts the embassy door. She is dripping with snow.]] / Krakatoa: Pant pant pant. / [[Ragnarok is doing up her bodice.]] / Ragnarok: Finally, you're back! The ambassador wants a word with you! / Krakatoa: He wants a word, huh? I'll come running at his beck and call, huh? / Ragnarok: Sheesh, now he's got time for you and you're still not happy! / [[Krakatoa slaps Ragnarok with a fish.]] / <>
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000830
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: So one of you has caught a nice fish! That's no reason to keep this catch from the other! Can't you share? [[The Baron von Fieffelfalsfaffel enters the room, to find Ragnarok and Krakatoa in a fight.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Ladies! / Fieffelfalsfaffel: This is no way to resolve a conflict! Be reasonable! / Fieffelfalsfaffel: So one of you has caught a nice fish! That's no reason to keep this catch from the other! Can't you share? / [[Krakatoa slaps Fieffelfalsfaffel with her fish. Ragnarok punches Fieffelfalsfaffel with her fist.]] / <> / <>
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000831
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Amazonian Agressors and Berserker Barbarians [[The Baron von Fieffelfalsfaffel's men rush in from the left. Tamlin, Jake and Atra gather up weapons, i.e. fish, on the right. Krakatoa and Ragnarok jointly attack the Baron von Fieffelfalsfaffel.]] / Sergeant: Amazonian aggressors are assaulting our ambassador! Attack! / Jake: Ragna is being besieged by berserker barbarians! We must do something! / [[A giant fish-slapping fight breaks out.]] / [[A noise from off-panel interrupts the fighting. Tamlin and the sergeant look up.]] / <> / [[Ragnarok and Krakatoa look up.]] / [[Jake and the Viking look up]]
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000901
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Take two parts goose spit and one spoonful of wasp fat. [[In the scriptorium of Lankin's abbey, Kel is reading.]] / Book: Will use many units of mana. Take two parts goose spit and one spoonful of wasp fat. Now when the moon is in the second house... / [[Kel's glass rings, startling Kel.]] / <> / Kel: GAH! / [[Atra speaks through the crystal glass.]] / Atra: Kel! / Kel: Atra! Stop that! You're giving me a heart attack! / [[Atra speaks through the crystal glass.]] / Atra: Good morning to you too, Kel. Where are you? / Kel: I'm at Tamlin's brother's monastery. Reading ancient manuscripts. / Atra: Great! That place has a fantastic collection of books on witchcraft!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000902
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Kel: Yep! And it's got copies of the entire secret vatican collection! / Kel: Anyway, have you found Gu?rún yet? / Atra: Kel, it's getting way out of hand! There's been an attack on the embassy! / Atra: Just as we were having a spirited argument... / [[People brawling with fish]]
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000903
 
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: None of us were hurt, at least not by the bomb. [[Atra narrates. Krakatoa and Tamlin have their fish-slapping fight interrupted by an explosion in the chimney.]] / Atra: ...A bomb went off in the chimney! / [[Atra speaks through the crystal glass. Kel and Jodoque listen inside the abbey's scriptorium.]] / Atra: Strangely, none of us were hurt, at least not by the bomb, but it did give us quite a fright! / [[Kel speaks through the crystal ball. Atra answers from inside the embassy.]] / Kel: Uh-huh. And now what? / Atra: The others are combing the area. We have seen two dog-men, who we think must have had something to do with the kidnapping. / [[Atra speaks through the crystal glass. Kel and Jodoque answer from inside the abbey's scriptorium.]] / Kel: Dog-men, you say? / Atra: Yes. Ring a bell? / Kel: Yes... / Jodoque: Yes...
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000904
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Kel: There was a formula for creating wolf-men in a manuscript by a lady Amoralia von Donnerwetter. / Atra: How strange. I know the monastery's entire witchcraft collection by heart. / Kel: I've got it. It's in the "Unnatural Acts" section... / Kel: Of the Vatican collection. Lady Amoralia had a refined taste!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000905
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Kel: Okay, says here... / Kel, reading: One Day, I reached an important insight... the way I'd been doing things really wasn't working. / [[Two of Amoralia's subjects are licking her boot.]] / Amoralia: Hold it! Hold it! / Amoralia: This isn't working. Look! My boots aren't getting any cleaner! / Second slave: Forgive us not, oh perfidious mistress! / First slave: The whip! And the dungeon! / [[Amoralia smiles broadly]] / Amoralia: Later! I've got to solve this problem first! Here's the key to the dungeon. Go lock yourselves up, I'll be with you in a mo. / Amoralia, being read: I racked my brain... / [[Thought bubbles containing cleaning devices]] / Amoralia, being read: Then I racked some other brains... / Amoralia: Got a good idea yet? / Wizard being stretched on rack: No, oh living demoness!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000906
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: How to get shiny boots. [[Scenes from the Book of Amoralia are shown. Countess Amoralia is opening the door to her dungeon, where a chained-up prisoner awaits her.]] / 1. Prisoner: You took your time! / Amoralia: Sorry, slaves! / [[Amoralia leads her slaves through the corridors of her castle.]] / Amoralia: I've thought of something that will make you the best bootlickers since my late husband, may he squirm in Hell... / 2. Prisoner: Oh depraved mistress... / 2. Prisoner: Your husband was a kind man. What makes you think he is in Hell? / Amoralia: I put his signature on the contract! / [[Amoralia force-feeds a potion to one of her prisoners.]] / Amoralia: Drink up! / [[In a cloud of smoke, the prisoner transforms into a wolfman.]] / Narration: The effect was spectacular! / Prisoner: Arooo! / [[The two wolf people lick Amoralia's boots.]] / Narration: ...And ever since, my boots have been shiny and clean after every licking!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000907
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: It was their idea of a joke. Of course, I didn't laugh. [[Narration from the book of Amoralia. Amoralia orders her wolfmen around: one is washing dishes, another is attending to her with a towel, another is about to mop up the floor, and one is licking her boots.]] / Caption: ...And now I've always got plenty of staff at my disposal! / [[Atra speaks through the crystal glass.]] / Kel: There are a few postscripts from her descendants. According to Algedemonia von Donderwetter, Amoralia died at the stake, but her daughter Arctica inherited the castle... Castle Rimur, in North-West Iceland! / Atra: Gotcha! / <> / [[Jodoque and Kel look into the book.]] / Jodoque: That's an interesting costume she's wearing. / Kel: Elvish. I once had an outfit like that. / [[Kel narrates. Kel in what looks like a black bikini, and boots.]] / Kel: One time when we were in the Land of the Gnomes, the local tailors found it necessary to dress me in a traditional Elvish costume. I think it was their idea of a joke. Of course, I didn't laugh. / Jodoque: Is Atra still listening? / Kel: No, she's hung up. Why?
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000908
 
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: The Heptokilononadecacenteduodecamerone? [[Kel and Jodoque are in the Abbey's scriptorium.]] / Jodoque: Uh... have you ever read this book? / Kel: The Heptokilononadecacenteduodecamerone? / Jodoque: Well, it has a rather nice story about a man and a woman who were also in a scriptorium... / Kel: Ooh... / Jodoque: Suddenly he grabs her, like this... and he pulls her skirt down like this... / Kel: Yikes? / [[Kel and Jodoque speak from inside the abbey.]] / Kel: And he brutally takes her on the reading table? / Jodoque: Not quite... / [[Kel speaks from off-panel. Jodoque stands outside the scriptorium, holding Kel's skirt. A group of monks are waiting to be able to get in.]] / Kel: Jodoque Davignon! Give me my skirt at once or I'll have you keel-hauled! / 1. Monk: Come on, give her back her skirt so we can come in without breaking our vows. It's hard enough as it is...
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000910
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: [[Atra ponders the conversation she has just had.]] / Atra: Castle Rimur... / Atra: Might as well take a look... / [[Atra gets on her broom.]]
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000911
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Take two. [[Atra's broom takes off abruptly.]] / Atra [[thinks]]: Whoa! Kick-ass broom! / [[Atra flies high.]] / Atra: Yikes! / [[Atra turns around sharply.]] / Atra [[thinks]]: Back! Quick! / [[Atra trudges through the snow, carrying the broom, with teeth chattering.]] / Atra: <> / [[Atra gets on the broom again, now dressed in thick fur coats.]] / Atra: Take two.
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000912
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Duck. [[Ragnarok, Jake and the Viking are walking outside in the Icelandic capital.]] / Ragnarok: Am I glad to be out of the embassy for a bit! Out here I won't have to worry about getting a fish in my- / Jake: Duck. / [[Ragnarok ducks. A shark flies over her head.]] / Ragnarok: Now what was that good for? / Viking: Look! The Allthing is in session!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000913
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Ragnarok: The what? / Viking: The Allthing. Our parliament. / Ragnarok: Yer what? / [[The Viking points at a large group of people who are fighting, using swords, shields and fish.]] / Viking: That. / Viking: Iceland is the oldest democracy in the world! For five years, we've been making our own decisions about all affairs of state! / Ragnarok: Like this?
http://rocr.net/?p=20000914
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: The oldest democracy in the world Ragnarok: The what? / Viking: The Allthing. Our parliament. / Ragnarok: Yer what? / [[The viking points at a large brawl going on further down the 'street'. Men and women are beating one another up with swords, shields, fists and fish.]] / Viking: That. / Viking: Iceland is the oldest democracy in the world! For five years, we have been making our own decisions about all affairs of state! / Ragnarok: With this?
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000914
 
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: The firm axe of strong government Ragnarok: Well, am I glad that Clwyd-Rhan is a monarchy! Long live the firm axe of strong government, I always say! / Jake: Liar. I've known you for 20 years and I've never heard you say that. Besides, we're bandits, remember? That axe could land on our heads! / [[Ragnarok thinks.]] / Ragnarok: Oh yeah. / Viking: That wouldn't work for us Icelanders. We may look like mild-mannered farmers and traders...
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000915
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Looting, pillaging and the other thing Ragnarok: Ahem. / Viking: But underneath, we're rugged individualists! Ferocious Vikings poised for long nights of looting, pillaging, and... uh... / Ragnarok: And what? / Viking: Uh... / [[The viking cowers.]] / Viking: Well... uh... you know... it's not... It's not the sort of thing you ...uh... talk about with ...uh... ladies present... / Ragnarok: Is it folk-dancing? / Viking: Well... that is... yes. / Jake: ?
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000916
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Send the bill to countess Alcydia at castle Rimur. Ragnarok: Well, just don't do it while I'm around. / Jake: Hey! Look! / [[Jake, Ragnarok and the viking look at a shop. The shop sign reads "Alchimia" and a poster on the wall reads: "Til sölu: Lóđ, 30 krónur fyrir eitt ker".]] / Ragnarok: An alchemist's supplies shop! We can buy the soap Atra wants there! / [[A wolfman walks out of the shop. Ragnarok, Jake and the Viking are startled. A shopkeeper speaks from inside the shop.]] / Wolfman: Send the bill to countess Alcydia at castle Rimur. / Shopkeeper: Yes, sir! Thank you, sir!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000917
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Hangglider! [[Jake, Ragnarok and the Viking hide in a space between two houses. The wolfman walks past.]] / [[Ragnarok looks out to see where the wolfman has gone.]] / [[Ragnarok and Jake look at the wolfman.]] / [[The wolfman stands still, raising his hand high.]] / Ragnarok: What's he waiting for? / [[A second wolfman appears from the air, on a hangglider. The first wolfman grabs a loop hanging from the hangglider.]] / Ragnarok: Whoa!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000918
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Identify myself? My foot! [[Wide shot: Atra, flying on her broom, is being hassled by two wolfmen on hanggliders.]] / Atra: IDENTIFY MYSELF? My foot! I have better things to do with my time! / 1. Wolfman: She refuses. / 2. Wolfman: How rude. / [[Atra dives rapidly. One of the wolfmen follows her.]] / Atra: Whee! / [[Atra swoops up, toward the wolfman.]] / [[Atra jumps off her broom, attacking the wolfman.]] / Other Wolfman: Up! Up! Dammit!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000920
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Identify myself? My foot! [[Wide shot: Atra, flying on her broom, is being hassled by two wolfmen on hanggliders.]] / Atra: IDENTIFY MYSELF? My foot! I have better things to do with my time! / 1. Wolfman: She refuses. / 2. Wolfman: How rude. / [[Atra dives rapidly. One of the wolfmen follows her.]] / Atra: Whee! / [[Atra swoops up, toward the wolfman.]] / [[Atra jumps off her broom, attacking the wolfman.]] / Other Wolfman: Up! Up! Dammit!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000920
 
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Hangglider crash [[Atra and the wolfman grab the handlebars of the hangglider, each trying to pull it in a different direction.]] / Wolfman: YIP! / [[The hangglider crashes in the snow.]] / Atra [[thinks]]: <> I'm getting way too old for this sort of thing. / [[Atra looks around.]] / Atra [[thinks]]: The other one is gone... / Atra [[thinks]]: Well.. where did I put my broom...
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000921
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Say, where did you find that beer? [[Tamlin briefs Atra, The Baron Von Fieffelfalsfaffel, Ragnarok, Krakatoa and Jake. He has a large mug of beer in his hand.]] / Tamlin: And so I found this outpost where three dog-men were talking about Guđrún and what some countess would do to her. She wants to swap brains with Guđrún! / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Well done! I shall summon up an attack force at once! / Tamlin: <> / [[Fieffelfalsfaffel blows a horn.]] / Atra: Say, where did you find that beer? / Tamlin: What beer? Oh! Damn! I've got beer. I must have picked it up somewhere. / <> / [[Fieffelfalsfaffel informs his men of their mission.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Men! We will attack an enemy outpost! / Men: Hurrah!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000922
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: I'll tell the loot-and-pillage squad. You go get the folk dancing troupe. Tamlin, Ragnarok, Krakatoa, Jake, Atra, The Baron Von Fieffelfalsfaffel and his men run in the direction of the outpost.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Hut! Hut! Hut! Say, how far is this? / Tamlin: Not that far. / [[The group passes two old Icelanders leaning on a fence. Fieffelfalsfaffel speaks off-panel.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Hut! Hut! Hut! / 1. Icelander: Looks like there's gonna be a punchup. / 2. Icelander: I'll tell the loot-and-pillage squad. You go get the folk dancing troupe.
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000923
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Puffin pursuing a flying fish [[Tamlin, Jake, the Baron von Fieffelfalsfaffel and his men rush towards the outpost, swords and axes raised.]] / [[Inside, two wolfmen are drinking. Another one is asleep in his basket.]] / 1. Wolfman: ...And as soon as our mistress signals the attack, I'll eat at least two of the ambassador's guards! / 2. Wolfman: I'll have the little witch with the boobies! But not for eating! Wink, nudge! / 1. Wolfman: Yeah! We'll show her our magic wands! And then, we could still eat her! / 2. Wolfman: Hyarf hyarf arf! You are such a comedian!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000924
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Let's penetrate into the castle and thrust forward! [[The Baron von Fieffelfalsfaffel kicks in the door of the outpost. The wolfmen inside are startled.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Shiver and tremble, fiends! The baron of Fieffelfalsfaffel is here! / Wolfmen: Yipe! / [[The wolfmen lie down on their backs, whimpering.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: You surrender? YOU SURRENDER? / Krakatoa: Baron! They're surrendering! / 1. Wolfman: <> / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Victory! Let's penetrate into the castle and finish the job! / Krakatoa: Uh... Baron... is that wise? / Ragnarok: They can't all be such sorry specimens as these! / [[Tamlin, Jake and Atra are emptying the wolfmen's barrel of ale.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Nonsense! We've got the element of surprise! We should take advantage of that by pushing forward! Are you coming, knights of Clwyd-Rhan? / Ragnarok: Uh...
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000925
 
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: We're never too proud to dididicate ourselves to the good cause! Tamlin: ...Uh..., we'd love to, but someone should stay behind to, uh, guard our prisoners so they don't alarm their leader... so... / Fieffelfalsfaffel: I'm touched! You give up a chance at heroism out of your sense of duty... / Tamlin: Well, we're not too proud to do the boring chores... / [[The Baron Von Fieffelfalsfaffel speaks from outside the cabin. His men cheer in response. Inside, Tamlin and Ragnarok raise their glasses. Three tied-up wolfmen sit in a corner.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Men: Let's not disappoint these knights! May their dedication inspire us to great deeds! / Men: Hurrah! Hurrah! / 1. Wolfman: Hey! I gotta poo! / 2. Wolfman: Wooo! / Tamlin: You're welcome! We're never too proud to dididicate ourselves to the good cause!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000926
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: An outing for the whole family and their livestock. [[There is a knock on the door. Tamlin and Ragnarok are startled, as are the wolfmen.]] / <> / Tamlin: Wha! / [[Ragnarok drunkenly raises her sword.]] / Ragnarok: C-come in! / [[A group of Icelanders, including old men and women, small children and livestock, brandishing fish as weapons, ask Ragnarok for directions.]] / 1. Icelander: We saw your army march into the mountains. Where's the brawl? / Ragnarok: Thataway. 'Ecassle. / [[The Icelanders walk off in the direction Ragnarok pointed out. Ragnarok calls after them.]] / Ragnarok: Th'dog-head guys is th'baddies! (And th'little tart wi'th' boobies!) / 2. Icelander, an old woman: It's been a while since I've been in a good punchup. / 3. Icelander, a little boy: Quick, grandma!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000927
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: I'vediedan'gonetoheavun! [[Tamlin stares ahead of himself, drunkenly. Ragnarok speaks off-panel.]] / Ragnarok: Shisshishshalasswan! / Tamlin: Wha? / Ragnarok: Sh'barrel izzemtee. Nomo'beer. / 1. Wolfman: There's a hatch under the table leading to the beer cellar. / 2. Wolfman: Shut up, you idiot! / [[Tamlin, Ragnarok and Jake have negotiated the ladder down to the beer cellar.]] / Jake/Ragnarok: Oh, wow! / [[Mounted into the wall of the cellar is the largest barrel ever. Jake prostrates himself before it.]] / Ragnarok: Look at this! Just... / Tamlin: I'vediedan'gonetoheavun!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20000930
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Secret passage! [[Tamlin fiddles with the faucet on the wall-mounted giant barrel.]] / Ragnarok: It's built into the wall! / Tamlin: Th'tap's stuck! / Ragnarok: You're turninin'it th'wrong way! / Tamlin: Am NOT! / [[Tamlin finally forces the faucet open.]] / <> / Tamlin: See? I'ss goin'! / [[The barrel front turns out to be a hidden door, which slides open.]] / <> / Ragnarok: A secret passage? / Tamlin: Aw, man! That sucks!
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20001101
Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Motherlode! [[Tamlin, Ragnarok, Jake and Atra walk through the tunnel.]] / Ragnarok: There's a light at that end... / [[Tamlin points at a table containing a meal all laid out.]] / Tamlin: Motherlode! / Ragnarok: Drinks. / Jake: Candle. / Atra: Hmm / Tamlin: Freshly roast goose.
http://rocr.net/index.php?p=20001103
 

Archive Page:
<< 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40
41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60
61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80
81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100
101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 >>