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|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Would you like a broom-ride home?||[[Sanderon projects his thoughts telepathically.]]
/ Sanderon: Would you like a broom-ride home? / [[Mother Turniproot projects her thoughts telepathically.]]
/ Turniproot: No, thanks, I'll get there by meself! / [[Mother Turniproot vanishes.]]
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan:||Jodoque: Look! There's a fair in Hogsbludderfenchurch this Saturday! / Kel: So? / Jodoque: "So?!" So I can juggle and tell jokes, and you can play the lute! We'll easily make 20 Clwyds at that one fair! / Kel: No. / Jodoque: What do you mean, "no"? / Kel: We are still part of a gang of wanted thieves. There will be guards at the fair, and we will be recognised. / Jodoque: Look, we never take part in gang operations. We're not on the posters. Nobody knows us. What are you afraid of? It'll be fun! / Jodoque: So... / Jodoque: let's... / Jodoque: do... / Jodoque: All right, forget about it!|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: You know, we almost got arrested here once.||[[Kel and Jodoque are in the bath house.]]
/ Kel: You know, me and the gang almost got arrested here once!
/ Jodoque: Hee hee! You would! / [[Kel taps her glass with her finger.]]
/ Kel: I'd only just joined. We were wanted for an attack on a royal courier. There's still a dent in the wall where a guard slipped over a piece of soap!
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: A clean sweep||[[Kel taps her drinking glass again.]]
/ Jodoque: You and your pals have an exciting life, though.
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Tweeting birds, sorry, WAP!||[[Atra staggers away groggily. One of the wolfmen prepares to attack Krakatoa from behind.]]
/ Krakatoa: Sorry! / [[Krakatoa wallops the wolfman with her broom.]]
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan:||[[Ragnarok and Tamlin attack the wolfmen.]] / Wolfman: Ghni! / [[The wolfmen run off with their tails between their legs.]] / Wolfmen: Whine whine whiiine! Howl! / [[Atra shakes hands with Krakatoa.]] / Atra: I'm Atra. / Krakatoa: Krakatoa. I take it you're not from here? / Tamlin: We're from Clwyd-Rhan. We are looking for the embas- / Atra: Tamlin / Krakatoa: EEEEEEEK! You are the valiant knights of Clwyd-Rhan!|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Ambassador, thrilled, thwip||Krakatoa: The ambassador will be thrilled to see you. How was your trip?
/ Tamlin: It was OK. But we heard some stories about embassy staff misbehaving... / Krakatoa: They're a bit on edge 'cause they're somehow convinced this place is full of demons... / Ragnarok: What's the Ambassador like?
/ Krakatoa: A great, swordsman, hero and diplomat. In his own mind, that is. / [[Krakatoa opens the Embassy's front door.]]
/ Krakatoa: He is now working to resolve some kind of fisheries dispute. / [[Ragnarok is hit by a fish flying out of the Embassy.]]
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: I am Ragnarok, flap||[[Ragnarok enters the room carrying the fish in her hand. In the background, Fieffelfalsfaffel's troops are fighting embassy personnel.]]
/ Ragnarok: Ahem! / [[Ragnarok slaps the fish on the main table.]]
/ Ragnarok: I am Ragnarok and I would like to know who...
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Regrettable misunderstanding||Krakatoa: They must have thought you literally meant 'Ragnarok' - the end of the world!
/ Ragnarok: A regrettable misunderstanding
/ Krakatoa: Indeed! / Krakatoa: Friends, meet Ragnarok, one of the renowned knights of Clwyd-Rhan! / [[That night, the Ambassador holds a banquet in honour of his guests.]]
/ Tamlin: Beer! I've been longing for this for days!
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Pondering powerful magic||Krakatoa: Not really. You'd need some powerful magic to make such creatures and keep them in that state... / Atra: But you'd have some really loyal servants if you could... / Tamlin: ...And then there was Red Sharon, a barbarienne who would only give herself to a man who could defeat her in battle. / Tamlin: She fought like a demon! I almost died! But I won, and won her love in the end! / [[Fieffelfalsfaffel speaks off-panel. Ragnarok eyes him. The Viking drones on.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Red Sharon! You know, I also met her once. What a woman! Only, I didn't find her so hard to defeat... / Viking: Anyway, a group of Vikings settled in and started slaying each- / Ragnarok: So you negotiate with the Ambassador about all sorts of things? / Viking: No, I work for him as a cultural guide. I- / Ragnarok: What's he like? Is he married?|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: I got my degree from Mrs. Faustus at Wittenberg University||[[An axe flies overhead.]]
/ Atra: I was taught byMTHPFH!
/ Krakatoa: Look out! / Atra: ...by Sanderon the Great, who was taught by Old Mother Turniproot. And you?
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: A gnome will never be an elf||Atra: Are you quite finished with those stupid games of yours? / Jake: Sorry... / [[Ragnarok speaks off-panel.]] / Atra: Mumble... childish pranks... / Ragnarok: So, he doesn't have a woman at home waiting for him? / Atra: That's an impressive educational background you've got! Going straight back to the gnomes! / Atra: But, as they say, a Gnome will never be an elf...(*) / Krakatoa: ! / Footnote: When it's a gnome saying this, he means it as a patriotic boast.|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Do you mean to say you've been taught by an ELF?||Krakatoa: Do you mean to say you've been taught by an ELF? / Atra: Uh, no... / Atra: I'm TEACHING an elf. ([[thinks]] The child of an elf, anyway.) / [[Atra speaks off-panel.]] / Krakatoa: Hold on. What can you teach an elf that it doesn't know yet? / Atra: Well... / Atra: Working with iron, transformations, things like that ... ([[thinks]] How to stop before she kills herself, mostly) / Krakatoa: Wow... / Tamlin: Don't worry, my good man, amice. We'll save that little duchess for you. Wansummo wine?|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: And did she have tits! TITS! Six of them. Unbelievable!||[[Guđrún fades into consciousness and overhears two wolfmen talking.]] / 1. Wolfman: Geir Stróm is a raving lunatic / 2. Wolfman: Carson Fire is almost broke so go read Elflife now / 1. Wolfman: And did she have tits! TITS! Six of them. Unbelievable! / 2. Wolfman: Har har har! Arooooo! / 1. Wolfman: Aroooo! You know what I also like? / 2. Wolfman: Well? / 1. Wolfman: Drinking beer! As much of it as possible. / 2. Wolfman: Yeah yeah yeah. You know, I once drank so much beer I had to puke. / 1. Wolfman: That's nothing. I once drank until I puked, and then drank a lot of beer again! / 2. Wolfman: Wow cool! I should try that sometime. / 2. Wolfman: ... Those tits... were they big? / 1. Wolfman: Oh yeah! Don't make me start! I mean, Arooooo! / 2. Wolfman: Aroooo! Har har har!|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan:||[[Ragnarok is brushing her hair.]] / Ragnarok. Ngh... / [[Ragnarok is brushing her hair.]] / [[Ragnarok is brushing her hair.]] / Ngh... / Tamlin: Breakfast! / [[Tamlin is startled to see Ragnarok wearing make-up.]] / Tamlin: Bread, ale and salty fish, I'm afraid. They're having some problems with the suppl-WHOA!|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: It was the fish, OK?||Ragnarok: What.
/ Tamlin: Pfrt! / Tamlin: Didn't you have a very interesting talk with-
/ Ragnarok: Grmpf. / Ragnarok: Well, you also had a nice chat with the Ambassador, until you collapsed under the table and threw up! / [[Krakatoa knocks on the door.]]
/ Tamlin: Hey, it was the fish, OK? After I'd filled myself up again I was right as rain!
/ Ragnarok: Ngh!
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: I noticed you were chatting up that viking.||Krakatoa: Good morning! / [[Tamlin and Ragnarok are in their chambers at the embassy. Tamlin is eating a sandwich. Ragnarok is brushing her hair. Krakatoa greets both in her shift.]] / Krakatoa: Good to see you're awake! Jake and Atra are downstairs. We've got to plan the rescue mission! / [[They walk down the stairs.]] / Krakatoa: I noticed you were chatting up that viking. I could arrange, uh... / Viking: Hey, Ragna! Good morning...|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Snogging in the background||[[The Baron von Fieffelfalsfaffel greets Ragnarok at the foot of the stairs. Tamlin is not pleased.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Ragnarok: You look positively radiant today! / Krakatoa: Atra! I was just thinking... Wittenberg uni is holding a conference on interspecies transference. Would you be interested in giving a lecture? / Atra: Well, you know, I've got my hands full with my pupil and the many sabbats in Clwyd-Rhan... / [[In the background, Fieffelfalsfaffel kisses Ragnarok.]] / Krakatoa: Okay, so how about taking your elf pupil with you? Or showing it to- I mean around the Undercity sometime!|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: The situation is as follows. Uh, my secretary will summarize.||[[The Baron von Fieffelfalsfaffel has convened a meeting with Ragnarok, Krakatoa, Tamlin, Jake, Atra and the Viking.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Welcome all to the first strategy meeting of the Committee for the Rescue of a Duchess in Distress. The situation is as follows. Uh, my secretary will summarize. / Krakatoa: We have spent weeks looking for Guđrún, but haven't found a trace! / [[Krakatoa leans over the table to point at a spot on the map.]] / Krakatoa: However, we've run up against a suspicious magical shield around an old castle on the north-west coast. / Atra: That and the dog people. Clearly, a powerful witch is behind this. We must be very careful.|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: The Dh'ptr syndrome.||Ragnarok: It could even be Guđrún herself. For all we know, she's not actually kidnapped, just enjoying a vacation! / Jake: Or if she was kidnapped, she may have started to identify with her captors. What we Gnomes call the Dh'ptr syndrome. / Ragnarok: Hmmm. In any case, we shouldn't do anything rash. / Ragnarok: What do you think, mister Ambassador? / [[The Baron von Fieffelfalsfaffel speaks off-panel. Krakatoa is annoyed.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: We should await new reports from our spies. In the meantime, there will be enough to do here at the embassy.|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: I take my responsibilities seriously, Krakatoa.||Krakatoa: What the HELL do you think you are doing? / [[The Baron Von Fieffelfalsfaffel pours a drink.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: I take my responsibilities seriously, Krakatoa. The fisheries negotiations have to be put back on track. / Krakatoa: And the fact that you won't have to leave the building in this demon country that way is just a coincidence? And besides... / Krakatoa: I don't think that wine you're pouring is for the Icelandic fisheries rep...|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan:||Fieffelfalsfaffel: Indeed. The representative is a tea-totaller. So I trust you will have a more suitable drink ready for him this afternoon. / [[Fieffelfalfsfaffel leaves the room. Krakatoa holds the door open for him.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Thank you. But I know I can depend on you in these things. / [[Krakatoa stares ahead of her, perplexed.]] / [[At the meeting. Krakatoa stares ahead of her, perplexed.]]|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: The Ambassador tarries.||[[Krakatoa is at the meeting table with Fisheries Representative Nilfisksson.]] / Nilfisksson: The Ambassador tarries. / Krakatoa: I am sorry, Sir, but maybe we can discuss a few things anyway, so that our viewpoints can be... / Nilfisksson: I do not negotiate with secretaries! Tell the Ambassador... / [[Nilfisksson walks out of the meeting.]] / Nilfisksson: ...That we'll be back when he starts taking his job seriously. / [[Tamlin enters.]] / Tamlin: Hey, Kra! We've run out of stockfish! / Tamlin: Would you mind getting us some new supplies?|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Would you mind if I wrung the Ambassador's neck first?||[[Krakatoa gets up out of her chair.]] / Krakatoa: Would you mind if I wrung the Ambassador's neck first? / [[Krakatoa walks off. Tamlin eyes her.]] / Tamlin [[thinks]]: Wow! Fiery little thing! / [[In the corridor, Atra is talking to Jake.]] / Atra: ...And not a piece of soap to be found in the entire building! / [[Krakatoa walks into the corridor.]] / Atra: And you know how much better cod tastes in a sauce of soap. / Jake: Ask the maid to get some.|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Let me kindle your loins, I mean your love.||Atra: Kra, could you go and fetch us a few bars of soap? / Krakatoa: Madam, we are vikings! We don't use soap! We go to the sauna, roll in the snow or whack each other with bath whisks! Soap is... / [[Krakatoa ponders herself turned into a frog.]] / Krakatoa: Uh... / Krakatoa: ...hard to find, but I'm sure I can arrange it for you! / [[The Baron von Fieffelfaffel is chatting up Ragnarok. A messenger arrives.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: So, after all those years in the cold, let me kindle your loi- uh, love, as you've kindled mine. And as for that fat slob...|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Ooops!||Messenger: Report from our spies, sir! More dog-man sightings! / The Baron von Fieffelfalsfaffel: This calls for speedy action! Have Kra make a copy in triplicate of the report and convene a committee meeting! / Fieffelfalsfaffel: Kra is a girl you can depend on. I don't know what I'd do without her. / Ragnarok: Hmmm... / [[Fieffelfalsfaffel looks away.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel [[thinks]]: Ooops!|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Lutefisk, or why it's unwise to store food with your chemical arsenal.||[[The Baron von Fieffelfalsfaffel reads the conclusion of the meeting from a piece of paper on a clipboard. Krakatoa sits on his right, her head buried in her hands. Ragnarok sits on his left, admiring him.]] / Fieffelfalsfaffel: And so we conclude this special meeting with the recommendation that we await further reports. Any questions? / Tamlin: Well, we're running out of ale and stockfish... / Jake: Actually, there were some stockfish left in the basement, but they'd fallen into buckets of lye. Is it wise to store food with your chemical arsenal? / Viking: That's lutefisk. It's supposed to be in there. Leave it for another three months and it will be nice and ripe. / Jake: Uh. Oh.|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: I often feel like there is a cold dark empty gap in my existence.||[[Krakatoa gets out of her chair.]] / Krakatoa: I'll go to town and buy some fresh fish. Anything else? / Atra: This place could use a broom. / Jake: The guest room is draughty and the sauna is too hot. / Viking: I often feel like there is a cold dark empty gap in my existence. / [[Krakatoa straps on a cloak.]] / Krakaoa: Backlater... / Ragnarok/The Baron von Fieffelfalsfaffel: Smooch|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Breaking through the Mandrake Spell||Alcydia: So you think he's breaking through the mandrake spell? / Wolfman: Yes, oh gruesome mistress! / Alcydia: That could explain those interruptions whenever I'm about to complete the operation. / Alcydia: Time to end the dithering! Cancel all leave, pull the doctor from his bed, and call up the death squad! / Alcydia: First, we'll deal with Fieffelfalsfaffel and his mercenaries!|
|Webcomic Rogues of Clwyd-Rhan: Grumble... this isn't the career I had in mind!||[[Two wolfmen on hanggliders fly over the town, startling a Norwegian forest cat and a magpie.]] / [[One wolfman points at Krakatoa, who is trudging through the snow.]] / Krakatoa: Grumble... this isn't the career I had in mind!|
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