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is that me being bored at a table with flowers on it, yep, yep, yuss	T-Rex: Which dude spent their weekend painting themselves into all the famous works of art? / T-Rex: Oh snap!! / T-Rex: I'm pretty sure it was this dude!! / T-Rex: Is that ME sitting at the last supper? I believe it is! Is that me poking my head in front of the Mona Lisa, obscuring her face entirely?... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1724
if she's vegetarian, she's got a bunch of veggie burgers on the side, and she makes it WORK	T-Rex: "My ultimate woman", by me, T-Rex. / T-Rex: ahem / T-Rex: My ultimate woman is pretty much super awesome, OKAY?? / T-Rex: She loves me and she's super smart at lots of things, but I'm still smarter at a few things, like knowing how to skateboard best, and we get along really well. Oh! And... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1725
can you imagine a more boring name for software than "windows for workgroups"? i'd sooner use "windows ...	T-Rex: Fifteen dollars, a plastic dancing flower, a copy of Windows for Workgroups that I found in an alleyway. / T-Rex: All these are things I've loaned out and which have not been returned! / T-Rex: And I'm CALLING IN THE DEBTS, Dromiceiomimus! I'd like my Windows for Workgroups back please. / Dromiceiomimus:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1726
ultimate baby ultimately prefers ungendered pronouns	T-Rex: "My ultimate baby", by me, T-Rex. / T-Rex: ahem / T-Rex: My ultimate baby is kinda okay, I guess!! / T-Rex: It's not too fussy and it's toilet trained super early. Oh! ALSO, it's one of those super genius babies that learns how to speak in a few months and has a fully developed personality. / Dromiceiomimus:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1727
IF SO, is it creepy to then take it home?	T-Rex: Is it creepy to try to touch a glass that you saw a celebrity has drinken from? / T-Rex: IF SO, is it creepy to then take it home? / T-Rex: AND BEFORE YOU ANSWER, is it creepy to declare that this is your new favourite glass, and that only you and the celebrity are allowed to drink from it? / Dromiceiomimus:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1728

anyway, the feeling t-rex was feeling was "shame (cheeseburger related)"	T-Rex: I think I have a problem, guys. / T-Rex: I think I have some feelings! / T-Rex: Yep, I definitely think I got some feelings on me. And as a man who inures himself to all but the most entertaining of emotions, I am neither inclined nor equipped to deal with these feelings! / Dromiceiomimus: What... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1729
there's a lot of guessing in this comic, are you aware??	The Devil: GREETINGS T-REX IT'S THE DEVIL GUESS WHERE I WENT DOWN TO LAST WEEK / T-Rex: Man! Georgia? / The Devil: WHAT / The Devil: CORRECT / (10AM) / Narrator: T-REX'S BUSY DAY / God: HEY T-REX GUESS WHAT I DID LAST NIGHT / T-Rex: Um - you caught up on your reading, focusing mainly on periodicals? / God:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1730
songs listened to while writing this comic: martha (tom waits), if rap gets jealous (k'naan), around ...	T-Rex: Let's suppose we all have cows! Ladies and gentlemen: this is totally awesome. / T-Rex: Now we all have cows! / T-Rex: But let's also say we all share a field for them to graze in. The problem is that any field can only support so many cows -- any more and those ladies will gobble the grass... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1731
panel three is a sad one for me, because i really thought there were enough nanoseconds in my life to ...	T-Rex: Let's say the average person can expect to live for 81 years. That's a little over 2.5 billion seconds. / T-Rex: Honestly, I - I kinda thought it'd be more. / T-Rex: 2.5 billion is really not that much! / T-Rex: I thought I'd compare the seconds in a life to the molecules in a glass of water,... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1732
in personal news, judging by the yelps, the downstairs neighbours have either gotten a small dog or gone ...	T-Rex: When you borrow money from someone, they usually charge you interest. I just figured out why! / T-Rex: It's RENT MONEY. / T-Rex: The lender is renting out money, just the same as if they'd rented out a helicopter! And just like the familiar helicopter rental, I've got to pay money to rent... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1733
in personal news, judging by the yelps, the downstairs neighbours have either gotten a small dog or gone ...	T-Rex: When you borrow money from someone, they usually charge you interest. I just figured out why! / T-Rex: It's RENT MONEY. / T-Rex: The lender is renting out money, just the same as if they'd rented out a helicopter! And just like the familiar helicopter rental, I've got to pay money to rent... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1733

the walk of acclaim	THE WALK OF SHAME / T-Rex: The Walk of Shame is when you're coming home in the same clothes you partied in last night. You spent the night somewhere else, maybe you had sexy times, and therefore you're to be ashamed! / T-Rex: That, my friends, is BALONEY SANDWICHES! / T-Rex: They should call it the... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1734
i liked the goal where the goalie was out of net, and there was a shot on net, and in the space of a ...	T-Rex: Oh crap, has it been four years? That means World Cup Football has started again! And THAT means it's time for ... / CUTE STORIES FROM WHEN T-REX WAS A BABY / T-Rex: ...what? / T-Rex: No, that's not what it's time for. It's World Cup fever time!! And that means it's ALSO time for ... / COMICS... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1735
tarrare's story was sent to me by a reader who said that for some reason, he thought the story would ...	T-Rex: I used to be a guy who'd say, "Historians: nice folks! They are Most Definitely not screwing with us." / T-Rex: I used to volunteer those very sentences at parties! / T-Rex: NOT ANYMORE! / T-Rex: Okay, so according to HISTORIANS there was a dude named Tarrare who lived in France and ate a lot.... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1736
when confronted with poison, don't swallow it! rather, distract your would-be poisoners with a masterful ...	T-Rex: So uh, it turns out that the flouride in toothpaste is, um, TOXIC. POISONOUS. There's enough flouride in a tube of toothpaste to END LIVES. Dentists weren't joking about not swallowing toothpaste! / T-Rex: Dentists weren't joking about a lot of things! / T-Rex: This is super concerning, Dromiceiomimus!... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1737
i should put the question of whether extremely beautiful people have problems to you, my readers, BECAUSE ...	T-Rex: What's life like for the objectively beautiful people? It's probably great to look in the mirror and think "WOAH, STILL AWESOME", but on the other hand, people would always treat you differently! / T-Rex: Maybe it gets boring when people are super nice to you all the time! / T-Rex: MAYBE that... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1738

i have done some Quick Photoshop Work and determined that it is possible for t-rex to pick his nose. ...	T-Rex: I propose a new law: that folks cannot be held responsible for what they do while they're sleeping! / T-Rex: Motion: PASSED! / T-Rex: Now when I'm asleep and I burp in a hilarious way, I'm not to be made to feel bad about it! When I wake up, we can ALL share a laugh together, okay?? And the... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1739
it makes calls AND makes my opinions towards cellphone users inconsistent!	T-Rex: Is it that time again? Has the hour finally been struck? Should I send not to know for whom the bell tolls, because it tolls for me? IS IT TRULY TIME ... / T-Rex: ... FOR MORE EUPHEMISMS FOR SEX?? / T-Rex: Okay! Let's call sex "wacky times for two or more, but actually usually one", "kinda weird... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1740
Then prepare for my amazing "Vampire Novel 2000"!	T-Rex: Vampires are in, right? That's not too passe? We're not all into ants that have combined themselves together to form the shape of a giant ant yet? Yes? / T-Rex: Then prepare for my amazing "Vampire Novel 2000"! / T-Rex: Ahem. Vampire Novel 2000! Vampire Novel 2000 opens up on the first page,... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1741
today is "wear your dinosaur comics shirt and interesting people will talk to you day", it's going to ...	T-Rex: What's today? Friday? Is it Friday? Or is it... / T-Rex: JUDGE EVERYTHING BY THE SAME STANDARDS YOU'D JUDGE A ROMANTIC COMEDY BY DAY? / Narrator: HOW'S YOUR SANDWICH? / T-Rex: My sandwich has a sassy female lead, and I use "sassy" in the delicious sense and "female lead" in the novel-but-soon-to-be-familiar... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1742
today is "wear your dinosaur comics shirt and interesting people will talk to you day", it's going to ...	T-Rex: What's today? Friday? Is it Friday? Or is it... / T-Rex: JUDGE EVERYTHING BY THE SAME STANDARDS YOU'D JUDGE A ROMANTIC COMEDY BY DAY? / Narrator: HOW'S YOUR SANDWICH? / T-Rex: My sandwich has a sassy female lead, and I use "sassy" in the delicious sense and "female lead" in the novel-but-soon-to-be-familiar... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1742
-UUUUUUUE. BUT THAT'S CERTAINLY SEEMS A FAIR COMPROMISE AS I RECALL THE CEREAL TO BE EXCEEDINGLY SWE...	T-Rex: Spring break! Woo! / T-Rex: SPRING BREAAAA- / T-Rex: -AAAAAAAAAA- / T-Rex: -AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA- / T-Rex: -AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA- / Utahraptor: -AAAAAAAAAAAAA- / T-Rex & Utahraptor: -AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA- / T-Rex:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1743

the voice in panel two's line was originally "But my bladder is at 110% capacity!" but then I was like, ...	T-Rex: When going on road trips (woo!), there are two kinds of drivers! The first kind of driver is: / Narrator: The NEVER-STOP: / Off screen passenger: But I need to pee! / T-Rex: NEVER / Narrator: THE SCENIC ROUTER / Dromiceiomimus: Isn't this a great farmer's market, T-Rex? Aren't you glad we stopped? / T-Rex:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1744
the voice in panel two's line was originally "But my bladder is at 110% capacity!" but then I was like, ...	T-Rex: When going on road trips (woo!), there are two kinds of drivers! The first kind of driver is: / Narrator: The NEVER-STOP: / Off screen passenger: But I need to pee! / T-Rex: NEVER / Narrator: THE SCENIC ROUTER / Dromiceiomimus: Isn't this a great farmer's market, T-Rex? Aren't you glad we stopped? / T-Rex:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1744
apology not accepted	T-Rex: Mistakes are terrible. From now on, doctors are NOT ALLOWED to make mistakes, okay? Excellent. / T-Rex: EXCELLENT. / T-Rex: Also mechanics aren't allowed to make mistakes either. And the police. And judges and lawmakers. And corporations. NO MORE MISTAKES, EVERYONE. It's too easy to say "It... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1745
apology not accepted	T-Rex: Mistakes are terrible. From now on, doctors are NOT ALLOWED to make mistakes, okay? Excellent. / T-Rex: EXCELLENT. / T-Rex: Also mechanics aren't allowed to make mistakes either. And the police. And judges and lawmakers. And corporations. NO MORE MISTAKES, EVERYONE. It's too easy to say "It... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1745
you can also cut out panel six for that mysterious air	Narrator: HOW TO PASS FOR A HUMAN BEING / T-Rex: Human beings are complicated, but they're also not really that complicated. It's super easy to pass for one. / T-Rex:...which is great, because that's what you'll be doing for the next 13 cycles! / T-Rex: The most important tip is to invest in at least... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1746
i think "ha ha, etc." is a great punchline indicator that goes woefully underused, ha ha, etc.	Narrator: HANDY PHRASES FOR WHEN SOMEONE HAS JUST HAD A BABY / T-Rex: "Oh, how adorable!" / T-Rex: "To date, that's definitely the best baby I'VE ever seen!" / T-Rex: "Have you considered naming the baby after me? It's a great name! Ha ha, etc." / Dromiceiomimus: "My goodness, he or she has your smile!" / T-Rex:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1747
i think "ha ha, etc." is a great punchline indicator that goes woefully underused, ha ha, etc.	Narrator: HANDY PHRASES FOR WHEN SOMEONE HAS JUST HAD A BABY / T-Rex: "Oh, how adorable!" / T-Rex: "To date, that's definitely the best baby I'VE ever seen!" / T-Rex: "Have you considered naming the baby after me? It's a great name! Ha ha, etc." / Dromiceiomimus: "My goodness, he or she has your smile!" / T-Rex:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1747
i think "ha ha, etc." is a great punchline indicator that goes woefully underused, ha ha, etc.	Narrator: HANDY PHRASES FOR WHEN SOMEONE HAS JUST HAD A BABY / T-Rex: "Oh, how adorable!" / T-Rex: "To date, that's definitely the best baby I'VE ever seen!" / T-Rex: "Have you considered naming the baby after me? It's a great name! Ha ha, etc." / Dromiceiomimus: "My goodness, he or she has your smile!" / T-Rex:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1747
dinosaur-style comics	Narrator: STUPID DUMB ADVERTISING SLOGAN TECHNIQUES / T-Rex: There are tons of stupid dumb advertising slogan techniques Oh my goodness, they're so terrible. Let's consider a few such as... / T-Rex: ...Style. As in "bakery-style" buns! / T-Rex: This word "style" promises authenticity but delivers the... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1748

what's that there blocking the hallway, oh man, it looks like a big ol' pile of CONTINUITY	Narrator: WE JOIN OUR STORY AFTER T-REX HAS LOST HIS SENSE OF SMELL: / T-Rex: It happened yesterday, shortly after I was complaining about advertising slogans! / T-Rex: And it was DEFINITELY the most interesting part of my day! / T-Rex: Do you remember it, Dromiceiomimus? How amazing it was? How it... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1749
"Explosions have been going off across town, and nobody knows who to blame. A neighbour volunteers some ...	T-Rex: "A handsome T-Rex has just found out he's spending his summer vacation on the run from the law -- and from the agents of the law that enforce it!" / T-Rex: Oh snap! Is it "Everyone Owes Me Five Excellent Movie Ideas Thursday" AGAIN?? / Dromiceiomimus: "After falling into experimental chemicals,... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1750
"Explosions have been going off across town, and nobody knows who to blame. A neighbour volunteers some ...	T-Rex: "A handsome T-Rex has just found out he's spending his summer vacation on the run from the law -- and from the agents of the law that enforce it!" / T-Rex: Oh snap! Is it "Everyone Owes Me Five Excellent Movie Ideas Thursday" AGAIN?? / Dromiceiomimus: "After falling into experimental chemicals,... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1750
Some people think that shooting energy beams out of your eyes means the end of history. Well... We haven't ...	T-Rex: Back in the time of History, how sight worked was pretty confusing. Rather than light entering our eyes, folks thought our eyes were sending beams OUT to whatever they were seeing. / T-Rex: Oh snap! It's the emission theory of vision, bitches! / Dromiceiomimus: But if it were true, how come... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1751
Some people think that shooting energy beams out of your eyes means the end of history. Well... We haven't ...	T-Rex: Back in the time of History, how sight worked was pretty confusing. Rather than light entering our eyes, folks thought our eyes were sending beams OUT to whatever they were seeing. / T-Rex: Oh snap! It's the emission theory of vision, bitches! / Dromiceiomimus: But if it were true, how come... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1751
i spent a lot of time deciding whether or not god could use the : in "answer:" in today's comic. i did ...	T-Rex: God, I'm BORED. / God: HOW CAN YOU BE BORED WHEN AT ANY MOMENT YOU COULD TAKE A BUS TO THE AIRPORT / God: GO TO THE ARRIVALS AREA / God: AND HOLD UP A SIGN THAT SAYS "ANYONE WHO JUST WANTS TO FRIGGIN' PARTY" / God: ANSWER: / God: YOU CAN'T / T-Rex: But suppose... BUSES TO THE AIRPORT HAVE ENDED... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1752
i spent a lot of time deciding whether or not god could use the : in "answer:" in today's comic. i did ...	T-Rex: God, I'm BORED. / God: HOW CAN YOU BE BORED WHEN AT ANY MOMENT YOU COULD TAKE A BUS TO THE AIRPORT / God: GO TO THE ARRIVALS AREA / God: AND HOLD UP A SIGN THAT SAYS "ANYONE WHO JUST WANTS TO FRIGGIN' PARTY" / God: ANSWER: / God: YOU CAN'T / T-Rex: But suppose... BUSES TO THE AIRPORT HAVE ENDED... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1752
to find out more about t-rex's best night ever, you'll need a much more reliable narrator	Narrator: T-REX'S BEST NIGHT EVER T-REX'S PLACE 9:00 PM / God: DUDE IT IS MOST DEFINITELY TIME FOR SOME HIJINKS / Narrator: T-REX'S PLACE 11 AM THE NEXT DAY / T-Rex: Best night EVER!! / T-Rex: Dromiceiomimus, you know those 80s movies where a group of teens have one FINAL CRAZY NIGHT before they all... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1753
to find out more about t-rex's best night ever, you'll need a much more reliable narrator	Narrator: T-REX'S BEST NIGHT EVER T-REX'S PLACE 9:00 PM / God: DUDE IT IS MOST DEFINITELY TIME FOR SOME HIJINKS / Narrator: T-REX'S PLACE 11 AM THE NEXT DAY / T-Rex: Best night EVER!! / T-Rex: Dromiceiomimus, you know those 80s movies where a group of teens have one FINAL CRAZY NIGHT before they all... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1753

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