Dinosaur Comics archives

You're browsing the archives of Dinosaur Comics.
You can search these comics too.

show: [ show full transcriptions | abridged transcriptions | just the first line ]

fisticuffsmanship	T-Rex: Spurred by an insatiable need to better myself, I have taken up a new sport! / T-Rex: That sport, my friends, is fisticuffs! / T-Rex: Do you think I would be good at fisticuffs, Dromiceiomimus? / Dromiceiomimus: What is it? / T-Rex: Boxing! The word is a seventeenth-century alliteration of 'fisty'... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=305
treasure hunt, 1950s	T-Rex: Okay, so here's the plan! I send cards to all my friends giving them the first clue on a treasure hunt! / T-Rex: Then, they go on the treasure hunt! / T-Rex: Each clue leads them to a further clue in a new location, sending them on an across-town adventure! / T-Rex: The final clue leads them... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=306
parties ruined by god	T-Rex: So, I've laid out all the clues around town and I've got the party and barbeque all set up! / T-Rex: I think we're good to go! / T-Rex: Is everything ready Dromiceiomimus? / Dromiceiomimus: Yep! I made drinks and set up lawn chairs and even a croquet set! / T-Rex: Excellent! Nothing could possibly... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=307
so anyway, god, he's bad at telling jokes	Off-screen character: Great party, T-rex! Hey, do you have any more chips? / T-rex: Sorry guys, those were the last! / God: HEY I BROUGHT SOME POTATO CHIPS, T-REX / T-rex: God! You came! / God: THAT'S RIGHT SORRY I'M LATE BUT THESE ARE SOME GOOD CHIPS / God: CHICKEN FLAVOUR / T-rex: Classy! Glad you could... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=308
corker	T-Rex: Yes, my friends, I would have to confess: / T-Rex: Last night was the best party ever! / T-Rex: Wouldn't you agree, Dromiceiomimus? You seemed to be having a great time at the party last night! / Dromiceiomimus: Yes, it was quite a corker! / T-Rex: A "corker"? What does THAT mean? / Dromiceiomimus:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=309

mother's day	T-Rex: Yesterday was a very special day for many people! / T-Rex: Yesterday was Mother's Day! / T-Rex: Did you give your mom some flowers for Mother's Day, Dromiceiomimus? / Dromiceiomimus: I had some delivered! / T-Rex: Excellent! And, attached to the flowers, a note? / Dromiceiomimus: You know it, baby! / Utahraptor:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=310
online usernames: bi-curious, bi-plane, bi-centennial_man, bi-nary_boi	T-Rex: You know what's the best thing ever? / T-Rex: The word "bicurious"! / T-Rex: It's funny when people use it, because how long can you be bicurious? You don't sit around all day saying, "Hmmm... I wonder what will happen!" - you look it up on the Internet, or you go out, meet someone in the gender... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=311
holy shit, single bicurious lesbians!	T-Rex: "Bicurious"! / T-Rex: Hee hee! / T-Rex: I can't get enough! / T-Rex: The sad thing is that the word is rarely used sincerely anymore - the only place you see it is in those sleazy newspapers with back-page advertisements for "bicurious teens!". Bicurious teens don't need to advertise! / Dromiceiomimus:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=312
an adventure through time	Narrator: AN ADVENTURE THROUGH TIME / T-Rex: Oh boy! Today is a good day I think for an adventure through time! / T-Rex: So long, Dromiceiomimus! I'm about to travel back to the age of di- back to long ago! / Dromiceiomimus: So long T-Rex! I hope you don't become your own grandfather! / Utahraptor:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=313
a moment of empathy	T-Rex: Who knew that designing a functional time machine was so difficult? / T-Rex: Not me: that's for darn sure! / Dromiceiomimus: Oh, T-Rex! Back from your adventure through time? / T-Rex: NO! It's freaking impossible to build a time machine! My enthusiasm yesterday was clearly UNWARRANTED. / Utahraptor:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=314

giant robot suits	T-Rex: Alright, so I'd like to build a time machine for Utahraptor so he'll feel better, but building one is clearly way too hard! / T-Rex: Clearly way WAY too hard! / Dromiceiomimus: But T-Rex, what if time travel is not just hard, but impossible? If time travel is possible, where are all the... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=315
fresh prince of bel air	T-Rex: Now this is a story all about how my life got flipped, turned upside down. And I'd like to take a minute - just sit right there - / T-Rex: I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called B el-Air! / T-Rex: In West Philadelphia, born and raised: on the playground was where I spent most... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=316
ticket restrictions	T-Rex: Fares are not guaranteed until paid in full and tickets issued. / T-Rex: Check restrictions: tickets may be non-refundable! / T-Rex: We recommend that sufficient insurance be purchased to cover all of your travel requirements. / T-Rex: Tickets are not transferable. No one else can travel with... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=317
you know what's funny? death.	T-Rex: You know what's funny? / T-Rex: Death! / T-Rex: Hah hah! Cause you're just walking along, and then it's "whoops! I'm DEAD!" / T-Rex: Eh, Dromiceiomimus? / T-Rex: "whoops!" / Utahraptor: That's not funny, T-Rex! It's tragic! / T-Rex: What, death? / Utahraptor: Yes, death! Would you find it so... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=318
what's for dinner? societal norms.	T-Rex: What's for dinner tonight, T-Rex? / T-Rex: Well T-Rex, I don't know! / T-Rex: What would you like, T-Rex? / T-Rex: I always choose what's for dinner, T-Rex! You decide tonight. / T-Rex: Hmm... in that case, T-Rex, let's have nachos tonight! It'll be fun! / Dromiceiomimus: ? / Utahraptor: My friend,... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=319

that's not really what you want to hear your band founder say, but shoot, sign me up!	T-Rex: Okay, so who wants to join my bluegrass band? / T-Rex: I have decided that I am starting a bluegrass band! / T-Rex: Dromiceiomimus, do you know how to play any bliuegrass instruments? Do you know how to play the banjo, or fiddle, or a mandola? / Dromiceiomimus: I do not! / T-Rex: Then I am sorry... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=320
that's what your jaws are for	T-Rex: I certainly didn't sneak into the Utahraptor's house and eat his food again, that's for darn sure! / T-Rex: Blaming others removes suspicion from myself! / T-Rex: Dromiceiomimus, are those crumbs on your chin? Did you sneak into the Utahraptor's house and eat his food? / Dromiceiomimus: No and... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=321
your verb tense is inappropriate, my dear	Narrator: DINOSAUR COMICS / T-Rex: Dinosaurs were giant ferocious lizards! / T-Rex: They were a constant threat to everyone around them! They were known to destroy human property with impunity! / T-Rex: Dinosaurs were also known to destroy human LIFE with impunity! / Utahraptor: I notice you're using... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=322
emails	T-Rex: Hey, I wonder if I got any emails while I was out? / T-Rex: Oh boy! Emails! / Narrator: BACK AT HOME: / T-Rex: What? No emails?! / Narrator: SHORTLY... / T-Rex: Dromiceiomimus, how come you never send me any emails? / Dromiceiomimus: I see you in person often enough! What do you want emails for? / T-Rex:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=323
emails	T-Rex: Hey, I wonder if I got any emails while I was out? / T-Rex: Oh boy! Emails! / Narrator: BACK AT HOME: / T-Rex: What? No emails?! / Narrator: SHORTLY... / T-Rex: Dromiceiomimus, how come you never send me any emails? / Dromiceiomimus: I see you in person often enough! What do you want emails for? / T-Rex:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=323
indian food	T-Rex: So the Rajasaurus down the street and I went out for dinner last night. It was great! / T-Rex: It was an oppertunity for me to showcase my sparkling wit! / T-Rex: For Instance: she mentioned how even though she had been raised outside of the Indian subcontinent by non-traditional parents, she... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=324

compressed origin story comics - spider-man	Narrator: COMPRESSED ORIGIN STORY COMICS / Narrator: Today's origin story: SPIDER-MAN / T-Rex: I'm Midtown High's only professional wallflower! / T-Rex: Oh boy, a science demonstration! What's this, a spider? / Narrator: ONE SPIDER BITE LATER... / Dromiceiomimus: Outta my way, kid! I'm a thief fleeing... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=325
hey, i heard you were pissed off!	Off-frame: What's the matter, T-Rex? You look down! / T-Rex: I'm just fine! / Off-frame: You look a little down! / T-Rex: I said, "I'm fine!" / Narrator: LATER... / T-Rex: ...and so the REASON I 'look a little down' is that suddenly everybody's talking about me and acting so concerned for my feelings!... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=326
comics about homecare	COMICS ABOUT HOMECARE / T-Rex: Homecare is when doctors or nurses visit you in your own home! / T-Rex: While some feel this leads to better care and increased comfort for patients... / T-Rex: ...others feel it places an unnecessary strain on our already-burdened hospitals and health care system! / Utahraptor:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=327
flying kites	T-Rex: I note that it is certainly windy out today. / T-Rex: Holy cow! We should go fly kites! / T-Rex: Dromiceiomimus, want to go fly a kite with me? / Dromiceiomimus: I don't have a kite! / T-Rex: We'll make them! All we need are some sticks, fabric, string, ingenuity! / Utahraptor: I have ample... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=328
the verbose garden	T-Rex: I've planted a garden around my house, and it is very pretty! / T-Rex: Best garden ever, if I do say so myself! / T-Rex: Do you have a garden, Dromiceiomimus? / Dromiceiomimus: Yes I do, T-Rex! / T-Rex: Is it nice, Dromiceiomimus? / Dromiceiomimus: It's very nice, thank you, T-Rex! / T-Rex: Glad... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=329

l'esprit d'escalier	T-Rex: "L'esprit d'escalier" means, literally, "the wit of the staircase"! / T-Rex: (It's French!) / T-Rex: It refers to when you think of a witty comeback too late, and you've already left the room! / T-Rex: Of course, this idea is largely alien to ME, as I'm never at a loss for a witty riposte! / T-Rex:... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=330
t-rex in: a contract with god	Narrator: T-REX IN: "A CONTRACT WITH GOD" / God: T-REX LET'S MAKE A DEAL / T-Rex: Sure thing, dude! / God: OKAY SO HERE'S THE DEAL / God: BUILD ME A TEMPLE / T-Rex: Oh-kay! / Narrator: LATER... / T-Rex: Damn it, it's too hard to find temple building materials! / Utahraptor: What? / T-Rex: Ah, forget it!... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=331
generic rooms	T-Rex: I had some companions over to my house last night and gave them a tour! It was a smashing success, except for one thing: / T-Rex: Some of them thought that my rooms "lacked identity"! / T-Rex: When I (politely) pressed them to explain, they said that while the rooms were decorated nicely, they... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=332
comics with twist/non-twist endings	Narrator: COMICS WITH NON-TWIST ENDINGS / T-Rex: I declare this to be "stomp on houses" day! / Narrator: LATER: / T-Rex: Whoooo! / Narrator: THE END / Narrator: COMICS WITH TWISTS AND TURNS! / Utahraptor: Hey T-Rex! / T-Rex: Hey there! / Utahraptor: Listen, I was wondering if you - / Narrator: HOLD ON... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=333
quick! save your game!	T-Rex: I have been wondering what it would be like if people could "save" and "restore" their life, just like in a computer game. / T-Rex: Things would be different! / T-Rex: I predict every guy would, when he has his first sweetie break up with him, spend YEARS restoring to an earlier point, trying... http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=334

Archive Page:
<< 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40
41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60
61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 >>