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| #0001 - Starting Is Hard | Are you sure you know what you're doing?
/ How hard can it be? / ZZZAAAPPP! / Yes Mr. Jeffers we had a power surge too. I wonder what caused it. http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=1 |
| #0002 - Razor Trauma | This is a Traumatised Razor / He’s been places no one wants to go / Now razor deserves this sort of existence
/ Please help. http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=2 |
| #0003 - Burger Bonanza! | Hey Neil. How's it going down at Burger Kingdom
/ Not so good. / The hours are long, the pay is awful, the costume itches / And some fat guy with bad eye sight decided to bite a chunk outta me! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=3 |
| #0004 - Brainless | Neil. You finished all the milk
/ What-evah! / Your last two rent cheques bounced
/ Talk to the hand / Right then. No more Clueless for you!
/ I'll be good http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=4 |
| #0005 - Enter Robo Pooch | This is Robo Pooch. Pretty cool eh?
/ I dunno. / Those things kinda creep me out
/ Your too paranoid / TARGET AQUIRED
/ RESULT - Kill in Sleep. http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=5 |
| #0006 - It Begins... | TARGET AQUIRED
/ Kill Kill Kill / ARRGH! / Nice to see you getting along with Robo Pooch http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=6 |
| #0007 - Its Not Big Or Clever | Now Robo Pooch. I'm not too happy about you killing Neil. What do you have to say for yourself / BEEP! / Aww. I can't stay mad at you. http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=7 |
| #0008 - Again... | God. What's that smell!? And where's Neil?
/ Smell? What smell? / My God! He's dead. I'm gonna call the police
/ I wouldn't do that if I were you / Now its just you and me Robo Pooch. http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=8 |
| #0009 - And Again... | Now Craig. You've killed off two of the main characters. It has to stop!
/ Can I borrow that pencil
/ Yes you may / DIE! / Mr. Brown, your 11 o'clock is waiting ... Mr. Brown? http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=9 |
| #0010 - It Was All A Dream | What a weird dream. Oh morning Robo Pooch / I must have left the shower on / Sleep well?
/ Good morning sir http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=10 |
| #0011 - Indoor Ornathology | Your days are numbered Robo Pooch / Um. Neil what are you doing? / Why I'm birdwatching silly ... hehe. http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=11 |
| #0012 - Meet Mr. Hammer | Times up poochy! Youre going down. / Robo Pooch I'd like you to meet Mr. Hammer. http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=12 |
| #0013 - Exit Robo Pooch | Ahh. Another wonderful day with my Robo Pooch
/ ... What the? / Robo Pooch? Answer me boy! / NOOOO! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=13 |
| #0014 - Olives? | Pizza Boy: "Here you go, one cheese supremo with ham, peppers and..."
/ Craig: "OOOOO" / Pizza Boy: "...Olives"
/ Craig: "Olives? I didnt order olives" / Pizza Boy: "What no tip? :mumble mumble: Kill his Robo Pooch! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=14 |
| HOUSD Archives | Neil: Where are you off to so late?
/ Craig:Out!
/ Neil: Out where?
/ Craig: Why can't a guy with a tender mental state go out with a ninja suit and potentially lethal weapons?
/ Neil: I was just asking http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=15 |
| #16 - Revenge Is Sweet | [[The Governer and a policeman are standing around a severed head. There is blood spelling out "REVENGE IS SWEET" on the wall]]
/ Gov: What have we got here?
/ Police: Looks like a brutal murder Gov' / Gov: Looks like suicide to me.
/ Police: But Gov', what about the ninja stars, or the "REVENGE IS SWEET" all over the walls in blood? / Gov: But it's so much effort investigating, chasing, plot twists. Let's put this one down to suicide, OK? http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=16 |
| HOUSD Archives | Neil; I see you've found the fish?
/ Cubert; Yep. / Neil; Ptoo!
/ Cubert; I.. I mean quaghh! Quaggh! / Neil; You... you can talk!
/ Cubert; No I can't... You're dreaming woooo! Wake up Neil! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=20 |
| HOUSD Archives | Craig: What are you in for?
/ Prisoner: I mugged a blind guy, then ate his guide dog! / Craig:What about you Kido?
/ Prisoner: I assaulted a giraffe. / Prisoner: You sicken me! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=29 |
| HOUSD Archives | Craig: Damn community service. C'mon Craig lets get this over with
/ < http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=30 |
| #0038 - A Blast From The Past | [[Craig is holding a box with a Sega Megadrive]]
/ Craig: Hey guys, check the stuff I found in the closet!
/ Neil: Oh my God! A Sega Genesis! / [[Flashback to teenage Craig and Neil sitting in a sofa playing]]
/ Narrator: Do you remember playing when we were kids? Man the graphics and gameplay sucked compared to PS2 and Xbox! / [[Same sofa with adult Neil and Craig sitting in it and playing]]
/ Craig: How did we survive so long without 2D gaming?
/ Neil: Woo, go Sonic! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=38 |
| HOUSD Archives | [[Cubert is playing on the Genesis]]
/ Craig: Wow Cubert you're good you totally ripped apart Neil's top score! / [[Neil is reaching for the controller]]
/ Neil: Bah, I'll show you true skill. Hand over the controller / [[Neil's fingers are all mangled]]
/ Neil: You broke my fingers! / {{#0041 - Don't Mess With A Penguin's Controller}} http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=41 |
| I'm With You! | What do you wanna do today? / Avril: Dude! Lets crash the mall! / Avril: Why'd you have to make things so complicated / Great idea Avril! / Avril: I'M WITH YOU! / Pleeaase stop singing! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=51 |
| HOUSD Archives | [[In a crowded concert hall in London, the best band in the world, LESS THAN JAKE! finisihes an amazing show, Neil suspended on the crowd, missing his right hand, rocking out loud, as he damn well should have been, seeing as though this is the best band in the world.]] < http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=56 |
| HOUSD Archives | (Cubert is on the phone)
/ Craig (other end of phone) : "Cubert, you gotta bail me out!" / Cubert : "Craig, how am I supposed to get hold of £600. I'm still paying off the loan for the last stunt you pulled
/ Craig (other end of phone) : "Oh c'mon, you can find it"
/ Cubert : "I'm sorry, but you'll just have to stay in over-night" / (Craig is on the payphone)
/ Craig : "Cubert, I don't think you appreciate my predicament. It's nearly 6 o'clock!"
/ Cubert (other end of phone) : "Ohh, is it shower time?" / Craig : "I'd take shower time over this any day of the week.... this is '''worse''' / Craig : "'''THEY'RE PLAYING THE ENTIRE JIM CARREY BACK CATALOGUE TONIGHT!! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=71 |
| HOUSD Archives | Ali; Hi there folks. Here I am with the writer of Housd trying to think up some more stories for the strips to come! / Ali; So then Mr. Chimpy, any ideas for the new stories?
/ Mr. Chimpy; How about you find a replacement for me. Because I quit! / Ali; That's brilliant! I can see it now - "writer auditions today - apply within"
/ Mr. Chimpy; Moron! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=185 |
| HOUSD Archives | Craig; CUBERT! I see you went to the t-shirt sale in town!
/ Cubert; Nice Atari t-shirt you got there Craig! / Neil; Hey guys. Check out my new t-shirt! / Craig; Neil! Why would anyone want to attach themselves to Apple Macs? / Neil; Umm. It's uhh, supposed to be ... IRONIC!
/ Craig; Of course. That's genius!
/ Cubert; I'm gonna get one too! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=201 |
| HOUSD Archives | Jess: Aww, thank you wayne!
/ Wayne: Wow Jess you look stunning! / Jess: Oh wayne! Please! / Wayne: Wow, I remember when we went to school together!
/ Jess: You actually remember little ol' me!?
/ Wayne: Who could forget you! / Wayne: You were the biggest loser there! Except those two geek boys Craig and Neil! C'mon let's get some food! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=243 |
| HOUSD Archives | Neil; Jess, what's going on? It's like a nightmare come true. You need to help me. I can't deal with all this! / Jess; Neil, just calm down. It's all going to be just fine. Cubert is just sorting a means of payment out with the police right now! / Neil; You mean you can bail me out now?! Wow Jess, that's such a relief! / Jess; Oh, no! Sorry I was talking about the police replacing the window they smashed when arresting you! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=270 |
| HOUSD Archives | Craig; It sure is good to be back in my old comfy, non man attracting clothes! / Craig; And playing the inane videogames, on the old sofa, with my hair all messed up just for the hell of it! / Craig; And being back amongst my dearest friends is the best thing of all. / Craig; Of course with every positive situation comes the negative! http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=287 |
| HOUSD Archives | Craig; Ah! What wonderful treats will you have on offer today Mr. Fridge?! / Craig; Hmm, not looking too promising! / Craig; There might still be something lurking somewhere near the back! / Mr. Tumnus; Hello there! I'm Mr. Tumnus. Would you like to stay for tea!? http://housd.net/archive_page.php?comicID=290 |