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| You've only been in SEMME half the time I have and look at all these friends you've made / I don't have any / Well you just gotta talk to somebody Let's go out to the lobby / So pick someone to talk to / I / Which one should I talk to / The point is for you to pick someone / Okay Which one do you think likes me Joe / You won't know they like you until you talk to them / But I can't talk to them until I know they like me / We're going to be here all day aren't we | |
| So my plan is to wait here until someone talks to me so I know they like me / Sure it worked just great those last 20 years / Keep me posted / Hey how's it going / Hello nice weather yes hi | |
| Wait Walky I need to fix your hair / Well maybe if you'd stop playin' with it / It's poofy / I'll do it I got a comb / You have a comb Since when / Since I figgered squad commanders should fix their own dang hair / Or maybe you're just growin' up / Hello | |
| So are you the talk of the town yet / No I sorta gave up / Didn't get any attention huh / No / What are those safari fatigues Maybe you should try for a new look Try to play up y'know your sexy feminine wiles / How's this look / Very Minnie Mouse / Thank you / No / Don't | |
| C'mon off with the hat / What / NO / I've never seen you without that hat on Want to attract attention / Take it off / Noooooooo / What are you balding under there / No I just really really really really like my hat / Sure and drug addicts are just in it for the nedles Gimme the hat / Over my fossilized remains | |
| All right I wanna see what's under the hat / Never / Geez Dina do you have some sort of crazy abductee super glue power Let go / S s say the m magic word / Crowbar / Eeep | |
| EEEEEEEEEEEEE / Hey whoa whoa Slow down girl What's wrong / I I'm having a real bad day / I hear ya there / The entire rest of my squad was injured in action last week Until next week I don't have a friend in the world / Reeeally | |
| There you are / Meet my new friend Agatha She's lonely right now / Really That's too bad You know I think I can help you Do you have about an hour / I'm completely free / My name's Joe Hey let's work some of the tension out of these shoulders / Um | |
| Dina / I'm a failure as a human being / Remember Dina we all have our talents Yours is being useful here in this lab / So I guess I should get back to work / About that Joe finished the work while you were out | |
| The Seventh Power | Once upon a time there were a lot of little atoms / They were very friendly / These atoms could share the exact same space at the exact same time as other atoms They could and they did / And those space sharing atoms made space sharing molecules and those space sharing molecules made space sharing clods of dirt and those space sharing clods of dirt made space sharing planets / Parallel worlds / Alternate timelines / A lot of very smart people wondered what made one world's atoms different from another world's Was it electron spin Neutrino spin Marketing spin / They weren't just curious They knew that parallel universes were kept apart by some form of energy And if they could harness that energy it would give us a greater power than steam electrical chemical mechanical solar or even nuclear power / The power of possibility / The power of chance / The power of hope / / It's near Salt Lake City These scanners aren't as accurate as the aliens' but they This can't be right / They're detecting some reality warping energy a bit like the Cheese's It's probably not related but / But I don't like probablies Dina meet squad 128 in launchbay 7 You're going on a field trip / So hey who's drivin' / Not you / That means I get to work the music Joyce you brought CDs right / Mm hmm / SEMME / Launchbay 7 / Crashing through the sky comes the fearful cry / Cobra / Cobra / Armies of the night Evil taking flight / Are you tapping your foot / No http://itswalky.com/d/20030420.html |
| The Roller-Coaster Begins | I thought we could go to the amusement park next time mom / R ride the rides You still like that right / I think so / Sale / $ / Calvin Klone / So How 'bout that CNN huh / You know looking at me as if I'm a beeping bomb isn't making this any easier / I know it's just Even before you were certifiably crazy you were always a little crazy And now you're so calm I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop / L / $ / I don't know what the new me will be like either Shanna But I know that I love you and that's what's important / You dropped Will's present / Anyway the job interview at the church went very well / I start Monday / / Hm That is interesting Sensitive Scanner And possibly useful / Interdimensional travel is beyond our tech If humans are trying it perhaps we can persuade them to share their secrets / I'll inform the Head Alien / No You can't Our tender exchanges are not for his ears / Scanner / He doesn't make me feel the way you do No one else can http://itswalky.com/d/20030421.html |
| Another Day, Another Strip | Jackie I am sorry / I know Will and you've been a dear let's just forget it / Back Addend DVD / So its sayanora to the Austin Powerz look huh / Jackie really dealt it the final blow She was right I was fooling no one / Actchally I think y'had most of 'em goin' Its just Jackies real sensitive to phony cheer / So how many times did you imagine me naked / My clothes / I didnt do it / I hate Fridays / This kind of thing always happens on a Friday / WAAAAAAGH / / Seven life forms you say / Yeah And get this Two of them are / Ahem Monkey master are you talking behind my back / The Sensitive Scanner has detected an interdimensional transfer / SOB / You're you're just using me for scans aren't you / with her usual astonishing acuity / sigh / I love you http://itswalky.com/d/20030422.html |
| Putting Stock in Junk | What've you got / Coca Cola bottle Cigar Broken glass / 65 MPH / Cigarettes half a bingo card and a wrapper for some snack called Nachitos / Lemme see that / Bingo / Nachitos / We gotta be in a alternate timeline I know every major kinda junk food there is / So it's a local brand / Trust me willya / Says New York N Y / Makes sense Everyone and everything here including the clothes and Alisin's chain have two things in common / We went on the time travel trip and we were exposed to Cassie's magic / So apparently mixing time travel with magic has bad long term side effects / Who knew / This is why Guth and I get along We're both logical thinkers / How fortunate for you / / Gosh my first meeting with interdimensional travelers I'm so nervous / What do you think we should say when we first see 'em Monkey Master / Depends on / 0wnz0red / Nah that's becoming cliche / Drop and give us your technology / Heh / We could always stare eerily and not say anything / Yes Let them experience a terrible nerve jangling silence / I don't think that technique suits your personality / Moohoohoohooha Moohoohoohooha http://itswalky.com/d/20030423.html |
| His Trailer Is Better... | Trailer / Three five seven nine I know you do it all the time / SCREEECH / Going our way / I apologize for this sir But we don't know how dangerous your timeline is or what laws it has I won't see my people executed for indecent exposure / Please don't struggle / If we're the aliens here does this qualify as an abduction / Heheh / Hey he's got lots of bras and panties / / Thirty minutes in a new world and already we're committing armed robbery / I think even Columbus lasted longer than that / Meighan / I know you still hate me Rikk So I've got nothing to lose by criticizing / I don't / I have more to lose if it's your paranoia that gets us arrested This world doesn't look any more dangerous than / Speed enforced by aircraft / Flying tarantula three o'clock http://itswalky.com/d/20030424.html |
| ... Than Her Movies | CHOOM / RAKK / Scatter All directions / Who's gonna pay for this trailer / SPLURT / NOOOO / Ive watched pornography like this / / Help me / Like a bug / Shanna run / How much is it like a bug / Most spiders can only see moving prey We might be safer if we just stay / WAAAUGH http://itswalky.com/d/20030425.html |
| Damn Fine Tea | It's good to have you back Mist / Hellnostrils are nasty business / It was a very near thing I probably owe my life to the enchanted tylenol / You're becoming something of an expert on other planes of existence wouldn't you say / I know enough not to get my luggage stolen / False modesty Mist / Yes I'm an expert / Half an hour ago seven of our freelance agents vanished from this plane for the second time / Their squad leader has been acting really creepy lately / I think they're using these field trips to learn things that we don't know That makes me concerned / And when I'm concerned I'm no fun / Think you can track them Bring them back / Well you know why they call me Missed sir / Because I've never / You know you're right I'm not modest at all / / Will Will Tell Katherine I'm / SLAM / I I'm sorry I / Hug the ground Will / Here comes another one http://itswalky.com/d/20030426.html |
| Joe's Design Vs. The Giant Spider | Target their guns then their spinnerets Web shooty things / No Dina it's after the life and death stuff that guys get horny After / Not getting away from me / I feel sick / And you make me sick We finally have something in common / Ssshhh / When did I become the mom / cha KOOM / SEMME / RUKKA RUKKA RUKKA RUKKA / It's like watching the Colum / Don't say it / / Head Alien / You'll never take me alive coppers / The air force is ten minutes away / Aw fudge / Wiigii We saved 'em / Uh oh / Uh oh Whuh oh / Those people Walkerton I don't think they're cheering / I think they look terrified / Open the hatch / Not sure Will / The enemy of our enemy isn't always our friend / Rumy stay combat ready Will fists clenched Alisin chain out Jackie / find a really big rock http://itswalky.com/d/20030427.html |
| Peacemaker? | Hi / It's okay You're safe now / My name is Joyce / Um hola Es todo a la d dereecha / We speak English / Good 'cuz I got abducted before I could even flunk Spanish / Abducted like our friends / I'm sorry to hear that / Maybe we can help I'm with SEMME / Semi / A group of former abductees We fight the alies who once abducted us It's empowering / These guys look ready to gnaw her arm off / She'll win 'em over / Really Then step down here / And we'll shake on it / CHLINK / CRAK / / She doesn't hesitate at all / She's taking in the scene She sees the suspicion the fear and she accepts all she sees / It's not navet She's just decided to trust me I've seen that look on Alisin before our bed got cold / I'm a married man / But if I weren't / Nice firm grip / Thanks http://itswalky.com/d/20030428.html |
| "Stop. Please! I Can't Take It!" | Meighan / All the blud is rushing due by head / Don't panic / If they're keeping us awake it's because they want To torture us Don't Panic / Ogay / They'll try things on you try to trick you make you forget your own name Ever read Orwell 1984 They could get inside you Don't let them inside you Don't panic don't panic / Ladies / I am the Head Alien ruler of this world its natives and even its visitors / And this is my monkey / PHA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA / / How ya doin' Spaceman Spiff / You know I've just lost interest in newspaper strips since your cartoonist quit / It's all right if you're not trembling yet It makes this sweeter in the long run / Prepare the Degrassi High videos M.M. / You will know fear / Whatever Dexter http://itswalky.com/d/20030429.html |
| First Impressions | SEMME / The beard makes you look like a sissy No wait my bad / Your whole face does that / People who pretend to be British are worse than real French / Oh look Dina it's your hatless better dressed twin / Ohh tough guy Probably impotent / Iss ssues / And this is Mike / Take your hands off me / Another evil Mike Maybe there's one in every universe / dangers of magic / Hm / indeterminate advanced technology / Science fiction club You're geeks You hot sexy thangs are geeks / Why yes We're actually 300 pound pimply greaseballs disguised with CGI / Hey lay off Tim He's a nice guy / / missionary in Bulmeria / You're kidding / I wish / Both our universes hava manga with transforming robots / Any self respectin' universe does / Christmas where we are so / Right Joe / Shut up Walky I'm scoring / Ha ha ha ha http://itswalky.com/d/20030430.html |
| Tijuana To Go | How soon / Depends on where he lands Tarantuship runs out of fuel faster than ours / Tijuana uno milo / We'll catch them / Thanks There's a woman in that ship We used to uh / Thanks / Loud aren't they / Walky's trying to relax the troops His method's probably healthier than mine / A constant state of low level tension / How did you ever guess / Excuse / Get that thing away from me / Blistering barnacles I'm not your lab rat / I've lost a lot of loved ones Erixon / But if we can rescue yours we will / Yeah thanks for the optimism / Don't mention it / / How do we get to your dimension / Follow the Yellow Brick Road / Stop doing my voice / Have you considered therapy / The other one seems to have fainted Head Alien Perhaps we should move to phase 2 / Yes yes That is my favorite phase / Bring the blonde one http://itswalky.com/d/20030501.html |
| A Private Affair | This feels sneaky somehow / We could always go back Do it right in front of the others / That might make some of them uncomfortable / Heh Yeah I'd like to try this with Walky but I just don't think he's quiiite ready / But this beats doing it alone that's for sure / Have I lost my #ing mind / Nah nah Jumpin' t' conclusions while listenin' in doorways didn't do Shanna any good I gotta find out / Grant us the strength to resolve this conflict quickly the wisdom to resolve it mercifully / the return of our friends and our home and peace and safety for the peoples of all your many worlds / / Now you / I think you covered it pretty well / Amen / Heehee Jinx / Heh / Alisin Would you would you like to join us http://itswalky.com/d/20030502.html |
| These Really Work. Take Notes. | Joe's playa rules / 1 Con fi dence If you know you sexy that make you sexy and if you sexy you know you sexy It's a sexy cycle / but it didn't matter I just wanted to be on the stage to bask in the attention / 2 Most women want to be seduced You are not their opponent You are their partner in a very pleasurable crime / Ohh hoo Gentlemen we have pupil dilation / 3 Let nothin' and I mean not nothin' rattle you See rule 1 / So that's why I am a drama geek / Now how about you and these transforming metal men / Hm / / Joyce tells me you're the master tactician / Ah nah I'm just fillin' in / I understand you're stronger than you look How much can you lift / Tony an' me maybe a car Joyce's pretty tough too The others're human level / Then I have a few suggestions for / I think we're good / Think you could take her / He just said they could bench press cars / I know / Perhaps http://itswalky.com/d/20030503.html |
| Monkey and Madness | You may act calm But the electrodes tell me a different story / Conditioned reflex / bip bip bip bip / See my sanity has been attacked by professionals And a genius And a maniac I tense up when I relive those experiences sure But hey Guess what / They / all / failed / And you think that makes you strong and stable / Predators can smell weakness and we are drawn to you What does that tell you / Pfagh / I don't know what kind of human sheep you're used to dealing with but my dimension made us out of sterner stuff / My colleagues have stopped an apocalypse fought a god smashed an interdimensional empire Our best fighter is an elemental force our leader is as brilliant as Alexander and our strongman / They are coming for me / They will find me / And then they'll find you / You are #ed / / It's a scary thing being an alien Isn't it / Wha what's that / Who's there / We captured you in the desert dressed for the office Didn't know what to expect hm I know the feeling / But you came anyway Voyaged into the unknown I salute your courage / I didn't mean to It was an accident / Aaah And what caused the accident / No Shut up / I won't betray them / I won't betray them / Shhh shhh / Of course you won't / And it won't be necessary / Your face / Now that I know you didn't invade us on purpose we can be friends http://itswalky.com/d/20030504.html |
| A Private Despair | You act as if he were cheating on you / He kinda was / Alisin / I am your friend But don't speak of him that way / He smiled at her like a sun lamp Relaxed 'imself in front of her / So / He don't do that with me anymore / I usedta laugh so hard with him An' at him sometimes but that was okay / He had faith I'd never really hurt 'im / That one's just so I c'n watch the pretty colors y'r face turns when y' read it / You are so heartless / A Treasury of Slashfic / There's a cold hard wall between those days an' these / You like it right It's th' kind of thing you like now / It's fine It's great / Happy Birthday / He says he loves me That's what good husbands say If I asked him he'd kiss me 'til he died / But when that witch made 'im sing out 'is heart he didn't mention me Ru / I think it might be over / Never Alisin Never / / Runes / Incense / Power / Cast out my senses into the world / Everything that is is part of me Everything in all Creation But what of what is outside of Creation / Concentrate Find the anomaly Focus http://itswalky.com/d/20030505.html |
| So... Head Alien Is Sexy? | Well Prime I think all the kids want to be prime He's the hero The John Wayne / The smaller cars are more like real people but they also don't kick as much ass / And why would you think this is worth being embarrassed about / Well you know girls laugh Sarah / BAP / Yes girls do / Women know that men who like to design robots are mechanical Mechanical intelligent employable and / dexterous / Why / BAP / What do you mean you don't want to overthink this / / Look Head Alien wants us to think too much You can't let him talk to you / He tries to make us forget what a good volleyball he makes / snerk / So what we do is just run in all fast like go Surprise grab your pals and run like heck / It will all work out / Hey hey hey Will / Wussybaby http://itswalky.com/d/20030506.html |
| I've Had Job Interviews Like This | Thank you Mike You didn't have to do that / Hold still / How many missions have you commanded Walky / Three goin' on four / Hn / You seen good people die yet / Yeah / Made any rash decisions that made good people die yet / I have / It's not fun / I say we need to overthink this / Dina / clic / P professor Can you see this sample / Is it consistent with the two I sent you earlier / Unfortunately yes / / There's a crease if you will in the fabric of the universe that these new travelers have fallen into / Like water down a hill / Dimension crossing has obviously been done before the crease is its footprint But thankfully for our new visitors their quantum structure is slowly reverting In a few days they should phase back home on their own / Observing the way their atoms behave may teach us how they do it and locate the original breach's source / That's good isn't it / Yes But the aliens can do the same And that's very very bad http://itswalky.com/d/20030507.html |
| And Mike Would STILL Call Walky A Wimp | Don't talk to me like I'm a kid I'm older than you You want not to get your friends killed Then leave the super strong alien fighting to the super strong alien fighters / Joyce this way / He's got a point / Really Y'mean I gotta get some people killed before I'm experienced Fine We start with Mike / Hey / Sorry You didn't deserve that It's just / What / Guys / Defcon one / / RUNNNK / What's happening / Damn it not already / Get your own hostages / You have a surplus / I claim right of salvage / Surplus / Holey crap http://itswalky.com/d/20030508.html |
| Or Just "AAAAAAA!" | What is that / The call him the Wanderer or the Cheese / He claims to be everything / God complex / Yeah but if you try to diagnose him he'll smite you / Get ready to ram 'im / Say wha / Everybody get the chutes an' prepare to eject We got eight Joe carry Dina I'll get Rumy Joyce I'll need you to grab those two outta the air / The only thing that's beaten him is a device we still don't understand I don't know if he'd even feel an exploding craft / We'll find out huh / / Out of the frying pan into the fire / What did you mean surplus sir / You don't know / You are duplicates Surplus in the universe / Your genetic code was already part of this world before you suddenly joined it There are other yous already here / Yet I see now there is something different about you underneath / Gluons mesons muons spinning like / Like http://itswalky.com/d/20030509.html |
| Fade to Blue | There / I can taste them now Feel them in my palm Meighan McDowell's flimsy relativism Shanna Cochran's self absorption and this Wanderer as stern and distanced as an abusive father / They are not yours Wanderer They are mine / Mine to do with as I please / As is anyone who claims my property / SHOOM / Come to me / / What is this / You you cannot threaten me I am the world / Holy monkeypoo / I will not allow / FFFZZXXZZTT http://itswalky.com/d/20030510.html |
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