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Okay Sal Jus' think of this like any other objective / Identify the goal choose a means an' finish it quickly / SMACK / Hi / Chickened out eh / It was a strategic retreat |
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She's 21 and she doesn't know where babies come from / Ah know ah know / Joyce is jus' the last person ah want to have this talk with / Look I'll do it / Who am I kidding It's just too weird / Maybe she'll find out on her own / On the streets |
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SEMME / What are you reading / Aint It Cool News reports a possible Robo Vac movie / Robo Vac / A comic book / I don't read comic books / Neither do I / Nowadays comics feature too many girls with impossibly huge breasts / I prefer more realistically scaled women like you / Thanks / I think / Uh oh |
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What's that / It's one of those parenting books / Joyce doesn't know the facts of life / Y'mean Blair an' Tootie an' Mrs. Garrett / Don't tell me you don't know what sex is either / The horizontal hoedown |
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Morning Joyce / Hi Jason / Can we have a little talk / Um okay / Look okay when a girl gets to be a certain age she / She may feel certain urges / Like showering in the morning right / Hold that thought In a minute we'll both feel dirty |
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How's the talk going / I let her get cleaned and dressed first / But really I feel dirty / Ya do care huh / Of course I do even if I'd rather not admit it For all of you / Even for Walkerton / When he's not eating vomit maybe / Oh you softy |
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What are you morons up to / Nothin' ah'm tellin' you Mike / Jason we'll do it together It should be less weird 'kay / Thanks / Joyce just seems so fragile / That's 'cuz she hasn't been properly beaten / Ah said go away |
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And then the maaaagical fairy comes down from rainbow land and waves her pixie wand over the young woman / And the fairy says Now you have a beautiful baby child It's a good thing you have a husband who can help love and support him / And that's where babies come from / Regroup |
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Now what we're 'bout to tell you Joyce we're doing for your own good / It might not be easy but we care about you an' / An' / Bro hold it still Ah can't read / Joyce remember the magic wand from your story Imagine that's a big fleshy male organ |
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Look I know about Cindy / Honey / Don't honey me / I know all about Cindy and her twin and Rick / I know everything / Cut Cut / Honey / We need a wider lens |
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And then the sperm flow up through the female's body until they find the egg to fertilize it / But one manages to penetrate the egg and a new human life is conceived / Any questions |
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Joyce what / She's hidin' in our bedroom / Well thanks a lot meanie / Lookit what you've done / Bro you of all people should be thankful You like her / Aie moral dilemma / Ah'm goin' to talk Joyce down from the dresser |
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What the hell am ah doin' / Joyce / Ah'm no problem solver Ah've got just as many problems as she does / Ah just hide 'em better At least she can articulate her feelings / Scoot Ah need that dresser more |
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Joyce why does knowing 'bout sex bother you / I don't know / I just don't want to think about it okay So so icky and and how does a baby even get out / It actually squeezes out through the vagina / You've got to be kidding me / Get down |
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Joyce your attitude towards sex ain't exactly healthy / Leave me alone / Ah won't Yer makin' a big deal outta nothin' Sex is a good thing / How do you know / Well / You're one of them / Oh god |
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Here she comes / Have you seen Mike's hedge clippers / I think she's taking this all rather well / G g guh |
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Daily Planet / Quick While eyes are elsewhere / This looks like a job / for Superman / Metropolis / Jesus Clark Why the hell are you taking off your clothes at work you freak / # / That's what should happen / Speaking of freaks |
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Pack up / What / We're going home fer a few days It's holidays / Home / You can meet my er our parents / Merry christmas / Woo Hurray Wiigii / Bleh |
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Why aren't you happy / I thought you'd like to have a family again / Maybe ah don't feel ah deserve a family Maybe / Mmmph / No angst / Muck moo |
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You ready yet / Bro don't rush me Ah don't / Look it'll be fine You've been lookin' out fer me an' I'm returning the favor / Besides / You ain't got a choice / Can't ya just buy me a coke or somethin' |
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Wasn't it sorta obvious that Beef wasn't really your brother / I dunno I just took it fer granted / What's harder to swallow That my real twin was switched with him at birth or / Or that compared to you yer twin is a huge mutated freak / Sal he can hear |
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Here we are / Mom an' dad are expectin' us / Sal / Sal |
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Kids I'm so glad to see you / Hey mom / Where is she Is she here / Sal / She disappeared a second ago / You bring my daughter all this way / And lose her / Mom if she's lost it's 'cuz she wants to be |
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Hey Mike / I was wondering if you'd like / Hey what are you watching / CLICK / Aw it looks like a love story / SMOOCH SMOOCH / Why are they getting on the table / Oh baby do me / Why are they rubbing against each o uh / Oh Oh yes Yes / You could have asked her to leave / Don't tell me how to do my job / SLAM LOCK / AAAAAA |
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You boys go in and greet your father / Hey dad / Weren't you bringing her / Guess he went looking for her / I'm thinking your long lost sister doesn't exist |
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How can you have a long lost twin sister / I think I'd noticed Beef's change in gender at least / Maybe Sal has a penis / Geez that dirty mind Just like your mother's / Yeah but she waits until people are eating |
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So this is where ya put my stuff / Where's Mr. Monkey / Mr. Monkey / You know my stuffed animal / Oh The tail came off in the move so we gave it to the Salva / Noooooo / What |
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Dad You gave away Mr. Monkey / I'm sorry / How could you He was my bestest friend ever / He wasn't real / He was to me / Do we need the girlfriend talk / Name one reason girls are better than monkeys |
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BIFF / How long is this moment of silence lasting / If you don't respect my monkey you don't respect me |
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Do you always run from your insecurities / What / Gotcha |
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