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Halt villain / Robo Vac / The one and only Enviro Mental / Or should I say Big Brother / My disguise / Now you'll think twice before kidnapping Bob Denver for peeing in the ocean / And I would've gotten away with it if it weren't for your pesky dog / Hey babe I have some clues to show you in the Mystery Van / Help Skipper / grrrr / So this is the issue where the writer started on narcotics / Hey on the next page nuns arm wrestle the Statue of Liberty |
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Danny you've got a visitor / I'm not really in the mood but send 'em in anyway I guess / Mary You can come up now / Mary Nononono send her back / Long time no see I thought I'd drop by to cheer you up / I'm putting you in a nursing home mom |
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What brings you here Mary / You / You've been through a lot recently and I thought you'd need some encouragement / Nothing you can say can fix me / Fix you You hafta be broken first / I killed my friend everything I believed in is false I just got my freakin' drivers license revoked can I be officially considered broken yet / No until you got to the license part |
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Daniel Wilcox Am I disappointed in you / In high school you were the most moral upstanding and decent fellow I knew And look at you now / You're soaking in your own guilt and welcoming it This isn't you / My word you're pulling a Sal on me / You mentioned something about cheering me up |
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I wasn't exactly looking forward to you lecturing me Mary / Well I'm gonna lecture you until you start seeing right again / This is just a phase you're going through / Mary / I mean you erred and learned your lesson and now / Mary / Beer |
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Danny But / How on earth do you rationalize this / I don't / This isn't anything I'd planned really I just feel morally numb to more things / SNAP / It's the first time that's hard After that I cared less and less / Oh no I've never cussed anyone out before and this is going to be real easy |
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Didn't you learn anything from what happened to you You got drunk you / What I learned is that if a life can be so irreversibly changed in one night what possible hope can I invest in / KNOCK KNOCK / There's some girl here to see you I think / # don't you females have anything better to do than give me unsolicited visits every day |
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Later Sal Seeya Mary / Wipe that sappy grin off your face Dan / What grin / Oh come on whenever Sal's near you I want to disown you as a pal / And I don't know what the heck you see in her She's cute but she's insane / What's wrong with insanity / Besides I think Mary's more your speed or lack thereof / Mary / But she doesn't have that oh so darlin' southern dialect / Here's a question Should I put my barf bucket to use or just bludgeon you with it |
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Billie What are you doing here / Um no reason / No reason You live on the other side of the state / I don't have to explain myself to you twerp / Twerp At least I'm not a stuck up little snot / Geez you two sound like an old married couple / DO NOT |
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How'd you know where I live / It's in the campus phonebook moron / And you drove all the wa / I took a bus / You paid for a b / Look shut up okay / Before you get all flattered I / Huh |
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Now that we've got her out of here / Yes / Why are you / Don't flatter yourself I didn't come here to see you / Well not all of you I just need one part of you / Your ears stupid / Ohhh |
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Like it or not you're the only one who'll listen to me and even understand / So more than anything I need you to sit here like dead wood while I pour out my thoughts okay / Okay / Gullible That was just to get you out of arms length of your beer / Hey |
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So when are you leaving / Trying to get rid of me already / No no I was just curious / Well my parents practically live on their stupid yacht now so they give me some cash an' let me be / So I wander around all summer and when I get back no questions asked / Cool / Hardly It means I'm stuck with dweebs like you for company / Beggars can't be choosers |
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Hi Joe / What are you doing out here / Danny and some girl named Billie kicked me out / Oooh / How long they been in there Are they getting it on / No Don't be disgusting / Scoot / Shhhh |
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Oh hey guys / This is a pretty nice house for a bunch of rednecks / I'm the redneck / You're the one from the southern end remember / Yeah from a real city / Danny there are more truck stops in your little town than people / I wouldn't know I never visit them / So what do you do Raise barns / Your town must be worse if you'd come up here / SLUG / Ow / Yep They're gonna get it on / Fine here's your five / Quit following me / You're following me |
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Those two are a bomb ready to go off / But / Danny wouldn't succumb to such sexual temptations would he Joe He's Danny after all / I don't care who you are once those hormones start flowin' aw haw / No I refuse to believe that Danny would Cut that out |
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This was going to be my car / But now that my drivers license has been revoked I dunno / Oh man so much has changed since the accident / Yeah / The guilt and stress keeps on building up and I keep trying to ignore it but before long something's going to explode |
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So where you headed / Oh I dunno Never seen Mt Rushmore / Me neither / Y'know I don't have anything to do all summer I could tag along / If that's what I hafta suffer through so I can use your car fine |
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Billie and I are gonna go to see Mt Rushmore / Alone / POW / Fortunately that's Billie ese for Thanks wise # Now we'll have to invite you so it doesn't look like we want to be alone / I'll go pack |
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What is wrong with you / What now / It's the dead middle of summer and you're wearing that heavy sweatshirt / I like it / There's got to be something useable in your closet / Ah here / Holy crap I'll practically be naked / Mmm hm |
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Alright I'm all packed an' ready to go / Do you take that freakin' sketchbook everywhere / Yep / Whenever anything interesting happens I draw it in here / Let me see this / When today exactly were you shipwrecked in the Bahamas / Is imagination dead |
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Danny hurry up We're leaving / I'm not coming out I look horrible / So You always have Get out here / That's it I'm plotting all their deaths |
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It's still a little above empty huh / Faster you wimps |
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I think we're going in circles / Do you think I can't follow a stupid highway / Yes / I think Dan's right / Oh do you / That's the problem with you males you / Actually I've drawn the Sears Tower every time we passed it by / Shut up |
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The terrain up here is beautiful / Home's all flat and dull so visually uninteresting Look at those rock formations / I am so moving away when I get older / Try Nevada Their mountains have the benefit of not looking like petrified horse crap / In fact you're welcome to just drop me off now |
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Well we're in Minnesota Suppose we should take a rest / 'Kay / I'll pull over in St Paul Maybe we can find somewhere to eat too / St Paul / Stop the car Stop the car / No way Joe Last time we stopped for you we ended up chasing supermodels through Madison |
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Botcon / Yeah / BOTCON 99 ROBOT TOY SHOW / An entire convention dedicated to transforming robots and stuff I was gonna switch schools for this very thing / C'mon Dan That blasted school rejected me so at least lemme talk to the toy designers / Y'know Joe for an alleged playboy you sure are a nerdy freak / Oh sure like there'll be any chicks here to impress |
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God I'm gonna be sick / Transformers / There's a couple who could use a good dose of shame / Aw I think it's sweet / Sweet It's an example of not knowing how to act in public Totally reckless and irresponsible / But that's what romance is You don't give a whit about anything else / If only more people would / Would what Lose all / Hey what's happening / Here Danny lemme demonstrate something / Okay put your arm around her and you hold his hand now rest your head / Now doesn't this feel nice / No / M maybe |
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Who do you think'd win in a fight Omega Supreme or Devastator / Sure Devastator was dimwitted but Omega fell apart after one round trip to Cybertron / Who the hell are you |
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