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| Journal: Growth Spurts | Narration: My younger cat, Shooby, is about a year old. This means he's finally going into his big growth spurt. He's already too big for my lap as it is, though.
/ [[Arrows labelled "Really big paws" and "Expert prevention of typing ability"]] / Narration: At this rate, this is what he'll look like in about a month.
/ [[Giant Shooby sprawled against house. Arrow labelled "My house", and another pointing to a cat, tiny in this picture, "Toby (already full-grown)"]]
/ Narration: Hopefully, it's just my imagination. http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20030830.php |
| Journal: Boredom | Lately, I've been bored a disproportionate amount of the time. It's not that I have nothing to do, it's just that none of it is terribly appealing.
/ [[Cat toy]]
/ [[Dumb but painful DDR-preventing foot injury]]
/ [[Junk]] / So between napping, video games, and half-assedly cleaning my house (a square foot at a time), I think about what people did for entertainment before computers.
/ Somehow I don't think it was really all that different than it is today.
/ [[Weblog circa 1867]] / I know better than to tell my friend Delphine whenever I'm bored though. She always wants me to help her work on her car.
/ For some reason I still can't figure out.
/ fluffy: What's this?
/ Delphine: The engine. Come on, help me with this timing belt.
/ fluffy: Won't it get my hands dirty? http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20030831.php |
| Journal: Itch | Narration: I spent all day today inside because I was covered in spots. The itchy, red kind, all over my arms, legs, and face.
/ Fluffy: [[thinking]] Gnnh... So... itchy...
/ Narration: As opposed to the cute, playful skin coloration kind. / Narration: The other night my friend Geoff decided he really needed to have a long one-way discussion in the middle of his front yard , irrespective of my comfort or level of caring. Mosquito: [[thinking]] Just one more hit! I swear!
/ Narration: So today I decided to see if these were symptoms of the West Nile Virus.
/ Narration: Nothing matched about it, and all the of the symptom lists said, basically, "Either you won't ever notice anything major, or you'll die in a couple days." / Narration: Now that I'm drawing the comic, though, I'm realizing that the itchy red dots are just the mosquito bites. I mean, duh. But one of the symptoms is a breakdown of mental ability... Or maybe I just need to cut down on my caffeine intake a bit.
/ Caption: Shooby, actually drawn as a tabby for a change.
/ Caption: Toby, still full grown.
/ Fluffy: [[thinking]] How big is he going to get?!
/ Narration: Yes, that sounds good about now. http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20030901.php |
| Journal: Stairs | [[Scene: in fluffy's office in grad school. Grad student Tom is in the background, hunched over a laptop.]]
/ Random dude: Excuse me, do you know where these stairs go?
/ fluffy: Yes, they go upstairs.
/ Random dude: Upstairs where?
/ fluffy: Upstairs to the second floor. http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20030903.php |
| Journal: Jesse | Narration: This is my neighbor, Jesse.
/ Caption: riced out Honda Civic hatchback
/ Caption: Dur! Pot makes you so smart (and cool!)
/ Jesse: I am functionally illiterate!
/ Caption: (Yummy Bud Light!)
/ Caption: You could fit an entire Pre-Colombian tribe in his pants / Narration: Jesse is an asshole and I wish he would [[drawn very large]] Die Die Die!!!! / Narration: Sorry, no joke today. http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20030904.php |
| Journal: Trip | Narration: After last night's Jesse-inspired rum-and-coke-and-phenylalanine festival, I feel like crap.
/ Caption: note: actually drawn the night before to save time in the morning. I may not actually be hung over. / Narration: Well, time to drive for four hours across the state to visit my family!
/ Caption: I still can't draw cars.
/ Caption: Or trucks.
/ Caption: Not my actual license plate
/ Narration: No comics until I get back, unless I decide to draw some anyway. (Text posts are likely, however.) http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20030905.php |
| Journal: Spa | On Saturday, my sister, a college friend of hers, and I went to Ojo Caliente, a spa built around a natural hot spring.
/ It was pretty relaxing. / Part of the package we got included a "wrap," where after you get hot...
/ They put you under a warm blanket to "detoxify" you. / [[The view for an hour: two slits of light through a mask of darkness]]
/ After I got past the thoughts of this being the premise to a cheezy science-fiction movie where aliens trick humans into willingly being mummified so their organs can be harvested to make pâté, I found it quite relaxing and meditative. / Afterwards, my sister asked me how it is that I'm so good at getting into a zen state, anyway.
/ "I had a lot of practice in high school English," I said. http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20030906.php |
| Journal: Aquatic Automobile Door Prize | fluffy: I had a dream that not only did Toyota come out with a low-cost amphibious automobile, but I had won one in a raffle.
/ [[fluffy is standing in front of an amphibious blue convertible. fluffy has fox ears and a tail.]] / fluffy: So of course, I took it for a spin in the water fountain at the mall with a few of my friends. Security was not amused. / fluffy: At the mall court we had to wait for a case involving some people in fursuits who had been traumatizing other mall customers. Apparently it was furry day at the mall. So of course, it was a kangaroo court. http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20030907.php |
| Journal: Chain Of Events | There's this guy I know, who I'll call Bob (since that's his name). Bob is very eager to make good things happen.
/ Bob: We need to get more computer graphics going on around here! Are you interested in the idea of starting up a local movie studio?
/ Note that eagerness does not imply competence. / So when Bob attended my master's defense, he immediately saw an opportunity.
/ Bob: Are you still looking for a job? I think you need to show this stuff to the folks out at White Sands.
/ fluffy: Hm, I'll consider it. / So he got me an interview at the local army research facility, even though they weren't hiring and had no money.
/ But [a few of] the people at the research facility were interested, and made an interesting offer:
/ WSMR scientist [[Eager person who didn't understand the talk but saw a funding opportunity anyway]]: Would you be interested in presenting your work at a conference in September if you're still interested? If you present this work, you might get us some money to hire you with!
/ [[Bob, happy to have made a difference]]
/ [[Bored people who didn't understand the talk or why I just wasted an hour of their time]]
/ I tentatively accepted. / Several months later, out of the blue, Bob forwarded me some email...
/ fluffy: Oh no... please tell me he didn't do that. ... Oh no, he did.
/ It seems that without my knowledge, he decided to "help" by following up regarding the conference. But at this point I was no longer interested in it. (I had already even told him that I wasn't interested in this anymore and that I had some interesting leads. I think he was trying to force me to give the army group a try anyway, since he'd spent so much time working there himself.) / fluffy [email]: Bob, I'm not interested in the conference. I have some good job leads in things I actually want to do for a living.
/ But it was too late, they had already arranged for my travel and scheduled a time slot for me to give my presentation on my visibility research, and now I couldn't back out because they'd somehow "done me a huge favor in arranging this."
/ Bob [email]: You may not think your work is important [??] but it is! These people went out on a line to get you funding so you could go to this [blah blah blah] / So I fly out to the conference early tomorrow morning, which is why I'm struggling to get my cats to Delphine's house for a few days. (Oh yeah, I got a haircut.)
/ fluffy: Shooby! Quit playing with the door and get in! Toby! I told you, no driving lessons until you're older! My insurance won't cover you yet!
/ teacher's handwriting: Great story, but a little hard to swallow. B+ P.S. see me after class http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20030921.php |
| Journal: Subway | [[fluffy is waiting around in the Washington DC subway]]
/ Woman: Excuse me... / Woman: Does this train go to Metro Center?
/ fluffy: Yeah, next stop.
/ Woman: Thanks. / fluffy: Huh. / fluffy: You'd think I lived here.
/ fluffy: Or know how to read a map. http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20030923.php |
| Journal: Searching | Delphine: Any other ideas where he could have gone?
/ fluffy: No...
/ Delphine: I'm really sorry about this.
/ fluffy: It's not your fault.
/ Delphine: But I feel bad about losing your cat.
/ fluffy: Please don't. You know he does this from time to time.
/ fluffy: I just wish I had some way of knowing that he's okay.
/ {{signed: still waiting for you to come home -- fluffy}} http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20030925.php |
| Journal: Children should only be allowed on planes as cargo | Boy: < http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20031009.php |
| Journal: Coming home | The first thing I saw today when I got home from Pennsylvania:
/ [[Shooby sitting on the couch]]
/ I missed you too. :) http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20031011.php |
| Journal: Shoes | Caption: I had a job interview today, just a backup in case the job in Pennsylvania falls through.
/ Caption: This means I had to dress up in nice clothes, including my uncomfortable dress shoes.
/ fluffy: [[Thinking]] This can't be right. / fluffy's Shoes: < http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20031027.php |
| Journal: Things that go splat in the night | [[fluffy and Toby are in bed]] / [[Shooby jumps on the bed]] / Shooby: [vomiting next to fluffy's head] HWARGH! < http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20031101.php |
| Journal: Explosion | [[Yesterday I decided to try out some fat-free potato chips. It was like a flavor explosion.]] / [[This morning I had an explosion of a different sort.]]
/ fluffy: In no way did that feel right. / [[So much for the theory that it's "perfectly safe."]]
/ This Product Contains Olestra. Olestra may cause abdominal cramping and loose stools. Olestra inhibits the absorption of some vitamins and other nutrients. Vitamins A, D, E and K have been added.
/ Este Producia Contiene Olestra. Olestra puede causar retorcijones abdominales y deposiciones flojas. http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20031103.php |
| Journal: Rejection | fluffy: Don't worry, Toby. I'll let you in once I get the mail.
/ Toby: [[off-panel]] MROW! / fluffy: Hmm... Spam... Bill I've already paid online... Ooh, something from CTC? Probably my travel reimbursement! Finally... / fluffy: Or maybe not... / Letter: Thank you for your interest in Concurrent Technologies Corporation (CTC) and for interviewing with our staff. Although your credentials are quite impressive, CTC is unable to match your talents to current employment opportunities We will, however, retain your resume for a six-month period should an appropriate opportunity develop.
/ Letter: Your patience during CTC's recruiting process has been appreciated. Good luck with future career endeavors.
/ Letter: Very truly yours. [[signature cut off]] http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20031104.php |
| Journal: Rubik's Cubist Homer | Narration: I got my brother a Homer Simpson's Head Rubik's Cube puzzle for Hanukkah.
/ Narration: Basically a 2x2x2 Rubik's Cube shaped like, well, Homer Simpson's head. / Narration: My brother immediately got it to where he couldn't restore it.
/ Narration: So I worked on it for a while, while "watching" cartoons.
/ fluffy: [[thinking]] Maybe this will work...
/ TV: Oh Inu Yasha! You naughty kittycat! / Diagram: 8 factorial. 2x2x2 3 orientations 6 faces 4 rotations = (8! * 3^8)/24
/ Diagram: or select one as origin - 7! * 3^7
/ Narration: At about 2:30 a.m. I finally decided to go to bed. Before I could sleep, I worked out (with two different approaches) that there are, at most 11022480 permutations, making a it feasible for a brute-force graph theory approach. (But I couldn't figure out a decent enumeration.) / fluffy: Yay!
/ Dad: Hey, great! Let me see it.
/ fluffy: No way, you'll mess it up!
/ Narration: Finally, tonight while "watching" "Scrooged" on TV with my dad at around midnight, I managed to get it back to the original configuration. / Narration: I had a really hard time not envisioning the Rubik's Cube transformations happening to everyone's head while watching the rest of the movie. http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20031224.php |
| Journal: Scary pizza | Narration: I just saw an ad for Pizza Hut which claimed that their Meat Lover's pizza had "practically every meat on the planet."
/ Pizza Eater: Mmm, processed, homogenized crap! / Narration: Which makes me wonder...
/ Narration: is this just excessive hyperbole (and a disappointment to anyone who actually wants to eat something other than the Eurocentric view of meat)...
/ Disappointed Pizza Eater: Where's the mongoose? / Narration: Or does it mean their sausage is even scarier than I'd thought?
/ Sign: Employees should consider washing hands before beginning work
/ [[Someone shovels various animals into a hopper from sacks labeled "marsupial parts grade C", "Toronto zoo reptile house", "rodent head & tails", and "cell block 224-9".]] http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20031231.php |
| Journal: Size matters | Narration: I just got Shooby back from Delphine's house.
/ Narration: Don't be alarmed, but I think he's started growing again. http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20040102.php |
| Journal: New and improved!!! | Narration: What knocks the phone off the hook overnight when you're expecting an important call in the morning... / Narration: Uses the litterbox without covering it up (and then asks to be let out afterwards)... / Narration: Farts with reckless abandon...
/ fluffy: [[thinking]] Is there a gas leak? / Narration: And takes infinite pleasure in making it difficult to get any sort of actual work done?
/ fluffy: Stop pushing my keyboard around! Argh! / Narration: That's right, it's
/ Title: SHOOBY!
/ Title: Now in extra-jumbo size http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20040121.php |
| Journal: Welcome to Albuquerque | Sign: Albuquerque City Limit
/ Sign: Elev. 5000 ft
/ [[Shooby almost fills the back window of the car.]] http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20040229.php |
| Journal: Freejazz | fluffy: [[thinking]] Hmmm... Is it a bad sign when the performers aren't even visible? / fluffy: [[thinking]] I wonder if that creaking backstage door is supposed to be part of the percussion.
/ fluffy: [[thinking]] Probably not. / fluffy: [[thinking]] What is that on the screen? Is it a... oh, I guess that's a camera back behind the curtain.
/ fluffy: [[thinking]] Why's there that green dot there?
/ fluffy: [[thinking]] Gah, are they ever going to change the effect to something else? It looks like a show on the Public Access station.
/ fluffy: [[Eh, this music kinda sucks. But, it cost $5...
/ fluffy: [[thinking]] Admission to wanky freejazz concert: $5. A few hours away from my parents: Priceless. For everything else, there's Mastercard.
/ fluffy: [[thinking]] ARGH, go AWAY, stupid green dot!!! / Band Member: We are Cosmic ReBop... Thank you for coming. We're gonna take a short break.
/ fluffy: [[thinking} Oh, good. They're moving the screen. Uh... why's the band leader waving at me?
/ fluffy: [[thinking]] ... Crap, he's walking right towards me. / Band Leader: Hey uh, do you play an instrument?
/ fluffy: Yes, why?
/ Band Leader: We're having a gig on the 18th. Feel free to bring it and join in.
/ fluffy: Really? Okay! Actually, I recently did an Internet-based freejazz session which you might be interested in... / Caption: Fifteen minutes of conversation later... / fluffy: [[thinking]] Actually these guys aren't that bad. http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20040306.php |
| Journal: Albuquerque winter | [[Snow covers the ground, trees, bushes, etc.]]
/ fluffy: Yay, I missed having snow! I love the... / [[The Sun is shining and the snow is all gone.]]
/ fluffy: ... winter? http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20040309.php |
| Journal: Shipwrecked Conversation | Friend: We should totally have our next party on a boat. Like, I'd be the skipper, and you'd be Gilligan.
/ Brother: Heh. Yeah.
/ fluffy: And I could be Mary-Ann. / [[Brother and Friend look at fluffy. fluffy grins and bounces.]] / [[Brother and Friend back away.]]
/ fluffy: What? http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20040328.php |
| Journal: Bad car-ma | Computer: http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20040416.php |
| Journal: Karate lessons, pt. 1 | Caption: Thursday, June 17
/ Caption: Magnolia Cafe, seating waiting area
/ Caption; Austin, TX
/ Sign: [[left arrow]] Restrooms
/ Bulletin Board Flyers: [[swastika]], "Kittens", [[face]] "$200" "Ford Truck", "Song Fight"
/ Big Sign on Bulletin Board: KARATE [[left arrow]]
/ fluffy: [[left]] Karate? In the bathrooms?
/ Hoblit: [[center]] I dunno, dude.
/ Ken: [[right]] I bet there's, like, karate lessons going on in there. Or maybe when you go into the bathroom, KAPOW, right in the face! / fluffy: Well, I dunno, but I gotta pee anyway.
/ Hoblit: Be careful!
/ Ken: Yeah, look out for ninjas! / Caption: Five minutes later...
/ Ken: So how was it?
/ fluffy: Let's just say I got a yellow belt.
/ Hoblit: All right! http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20040617.php |
| Journal: Catching up is hard to do | fluffy: Wow, it's been way too long since we've talked.
/ Erin: Yeah! Tell us the gossip, like what's been going on in the CS department!
/ fluffy: Er, I dunno. I quit the PhD program last December.
/ Erin: Oh.
/ fluffy: Well, what about you guys? Like, are you two ever going to get married?
/ Erin: Um, we did already...
/ Ross: Yeah, in January of 2002.
/ fluffy: ... Oh.
/ fluffy: Well, congratulations! http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20040618.php |
| Journal: Karate lessons, pt. 2 | [[Dr. Worm, Glenn, Hoblit, fluffy, Ken sitting around the table]]
/ Two hours (and many nachos) later...
/ fluffy: Ugh, I'm not feeling so good. I'll be right back.
/ Hoblit: Gotta take another karate lesson?
/ fluffy: Heh, yeah. / [[fluffy goes back to the 'misc' restroom]] / Fifteen minutes later
/ fluffy: So, didja miss me?
/ Hoblit: Dude, I was about to go in there to rescue you from the ninjas! Did you get another yellow belt?
/ fluffy: Nope, I graduated to a brown belt.
/ Hoblit: Sweet. http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20040619.php |
| Journal: The payoff, pt. 1 | Caption: June 19, 2004, 6:30 PM
/ Caption: Church of the Friendly Ghost
/ Caption: 209 Pedernales, Austin, TX
/ [[fluffy plays guitar and sings]]
/ fluffy: [[singing]] Life is like a riddle
/ fluffy: [[singing]] Stuck in the middle
/ fluffy: [[singing]] I have been such a fool
/ fluffy: [[singing]] A fool in the middle
/ fluffy: [[thinking]] Argh, it's so hot up here... and all I can hear is the drums, not even my own voice...
/ [[Glenn (as a snake) plays an Ensoniq keyboard, plugged into a box labelled "Fred"]]
/ [[Ken plays drums]]
/ [[Hoblit plays bass.]] / Caption: 20 minutes later...
/ fluffy: Thank you, and goodnight Austin, Texas, wherever you are!
/ fluffy: [[thinking]] Wow... actual cheering... I can't wait to hear how it sounds in the recordings! http://beesbuzz.biz/d/20040620.php |
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