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| Irregular Webcomic! #2944 | Isaac Newton: ... ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! / / Isaac Newton: You, a great scientist, do not make me laugh. / / Me: Well, at least you think I'm funny. / / Me: A little humour to lighten the gravity of the situation, eh Isaac? Eh? / / [[beat]] http://irregularwebcomic.net/2944.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2945 | Hitler's Brain: Come, we have die invasion of Russia to plan. / / Haken: Russia? What did they ever do to us? / / [[they leave the room]] / / Hitler's Brain: They signed a non-aggression pact with us. / / Haken: Clearly a hostile move... / / Hitler's Brain: My thoughts exactly. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2945.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2946 | Ishmael: A Martian robot. Well well. / / SFX: Knock! Knock! / / Ishmael: Excuse me. / / Man in Black: There's no such thing as Martian robots. / / Ishmael: You're a bit late. / / Man in Black: There's no such thing as me being late. You probably just saw the planet Venus. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2946.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2947 | [[scene: Nazi Mars base in 1947]] / / Young Jamie: If we hack these circuits, these teleporters can not only send us home in space, but also in time. / / Young Adam: Or... we could visit any time period in history we want! / / Young Jamie: With no way to get home again. / / Young Adam: To the 1980s?? / / Young Jamie: Good point. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2947.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2948 | [[scene: Serron and Iki Piki are being wheeled on gurneys through the hospital corridors by orderlies]] / / Past Serron: You know, I nearly took up medicine as a career. / / Past Iki Piki: For the satisfaction of helping people in need? / / Past Serron: No, for the immense loads of wealth! / / Past Iki Piki: Of course. / / Past Serron: Then I discovered you have to work hard to get it! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2948.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2949 | Student: [[entering]] Professor Tolkien! Have you heard the news? Nazis have raided the Tower of London and stolen the Crown Jewels! / / J. R. R. Tolkien: But... if he loses his regalia the king forfeits his throne and must go into exile! Where can he go that is safe? / / Student: He could go to Scotland and wander the moors incognito. / / J. R. R. Tolkien: The rightful king turned into some sort of ranger of the North? That's the most preposterous thing I've ever heard! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2949.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2950 | Kyros: Can we get some sleep now and worry about this in the morning? / / Draak: Draak take first watch. / / Mordekai: If you see that invisible creature that none of us has ever seen, wake us up. / / Draak: Wake rogue up? Draak see the thing that no can be seen is less hard part. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2950.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2951 | [[scene: Inside Isaac Newton's time machine]] / / Isaac Newton: Mr Morgan-Mar, these are Messrs Galilei, Copernicus, Kepler, Lavoisier, Maxwell, Hutton, Dodgson, and Darwin. / / Me: And who's this foxy young lady? / / Isaac Newton: Miss Jane Goodall. / / [[beat]] / / Me: Gaaaaahhh!!! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2951.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2952 | Monty: Tell us what's happened in the war, Sallah. / / Sallah: The Nazis have annexed or invaded most of Europe. They've installed a puppet government in France. / / Prof. Jones: That sounds a bit Vichy. / / Sallah: Now they're mounting air raids on England with zeppelin bombers. / / Sallah: And I heard they sent a U-boat up the Thames to steal the Crown Jewels from the Tower. / / Monty: The pirates! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2952.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2953 | Caption: In the swirling chaos when the Universe is born... / / Caption: Comes forth an entity so horribly mind-ripping that the souls of all who behold its awful countenance are laid bare. / / Cthulhu: FHTAGN. / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: Hey there. Fancy a meal of giant frog? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2953.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2954 | Young Jamie: Surely if we can go back in time we should stop the Nazis from winning the war. / / Young Adam: Two people against the might of Hitler's war machine? / / Young Jamie: I know it seems daunting... / / Young Adam: Ach, nein, mein freund! Ich liebe to put on die amusing Deutsch acczent, ja! / / Young Jamie: Ah, so your plan is to stymie German communications? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2954.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2955 | [[scene: Hitler's command room]] / / Steve: [[emerging from behind the rows of cloned brains]] Crikey! Did you hear that?! Hitler's going to betray the Russians! / / Terry: I'm slightly more surprised that Hitler is a brain in a jar... / / Steve: Crikey! I thought that must have been something that everyone knew. / / Terry: You did? / / Steve: I didn't want to say anything in case everyone thought I was ignorant. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2955.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2956 | [[scene: An operating theatre]] / / Kelly: Hi, I'm Kelly. I'll be your anaesthetist today. / / Serron: Wow, you're a knock-out! / / Sabrina: I'm Sabrina, I'll be doing your surgery. / / Serron: And I think you might be stealing my heart! / / Sabrina: Have you been letting details of our procedures slip again? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2956.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2957 | SFX: Riiiing! / / Ishmael: Excuse me. / / Phone: Hi, this is the Nigerian Finance Minister. I'm playing "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire" and I'm about to win a million dollars, but I need help on the last question. / / Phone: You're my phone-a-friend lifeline. If you help, I'll give you 20% of the winnings. / / Ishmael: Sure! What's the question? / / [[scene change: The set of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire]] / / Nigerian Finance Minister: What is the bank account number of Ishmael Herman? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2957.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2958 | Ophelia: The Nazis have stolen the Crown Jewels? That never happened! / / Student: Are you calling me a liar? / / Ophelia: That's not what I meant... / / Student: It just came over the wireless from London! / / Ophelia: I mean the Nazis never even planned to steal the Crown Jewels. / / Student: You're privy to Nazi plans?! / / Student: Spies! They're spies!! / / Shakespeare: Oh well done, Ophelia. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2958.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2959 | [[scene: Darkness in the Swamp of Terror]] / / Mordekai: Zzzz... Zzzwrhrh wha...? / / Draak: Draak wake rogue for next watch. / / Mordekai: Oh, okay, thanks Draak. You can go to sleep now. I'm awake. / / [[beat]] / / Mordekai: Zzzz... / / Gollum: Gollum! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2959.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2960 | Young Jane Goodall: Why did you scream when you heard my name? / / Me: You're... Jane Goodall! I've met you... in 2006! / / Young Jane Goodall: I'm from the 1960s. / / Me: I can't stop seeing you as a wrinkly old woman with grey hair! / / Young Jane Goodall: When I meet you again, remind me to chimp-slap you upside the head. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2960.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2961 | [[scene: A hospital on Bune]] / / Paris: Hey Spanners. Just calling to let you know I found Iki Piki and Serron. I'm in the hospital with them, getting their organs replaced. / / [[scene change: the Legacy engine room]] / / Spanner: Um. Iki Piki and Serron are here at the ship. / / Paris: [[over phone]] What? Are you sure it's them? / / Serron: Hey Spanners! I'm going to put some of the antimatter into the water tank to brew up a batch of coffee! Want some? / / Spanners: Pretty sure. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2961.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2962 | [[scene: Outside the "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" studio"]] / / Nigerian Finance Bureaucrat: Well done, Finance Minister. A million dollars will make a big difference to Nigeria's federal budget. / / Nigerian Finance Minister: $800,000. We mustn't renege on our deal with that helpful American with the bank account details. / / Nigerian Finance Bureaucrat: This is our most successful fundraising event ever! What shall we do with the cash? / / Nigerian Finance Minister: Invest it wisely. / / Nigerian Finance Bureaucrat: Ah, of course! / / Nigerian Finance Minister: Got any good horse racing tips? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2962.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2963 | [[scene: Dawn, the Swamp of Terror]] / / Alvissa: Yaaawn... / / Alvissa: Hey! Wake up, everyone! Why is nobody on watch?! / / Alvissa: What happened in the night?! / / Alvissa: Where's Lambert??!! / / Mordekai: Why so many questions? It's too early for this. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2963.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2964 | Caption: Vast gulfs of time and space... / / [[close up of Cthulhu's face]] / / SFX: Transcend! / / [[Cthulhu appears on the Infinite Featureless Plane of Death]] http://irregularwebcomic.net/2964.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2965 | [[scene: the library at Oxford University]] / / Ophelia: This is worse than we thought. History has been changed. / / Mercutio: It's worse than that. It's been changed during World War II. That could mean the Nazis will win. / / Student: [[entering the library]] Professor! London's being attacked! / / Ophelia: Uh oh. I knew this would happen. / / Student: She knew! I told you they were spies! / / Shakespeare: Oh my. That's even worse. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2965.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2966 | Young Jamie: It's worse than I thought. These teleporters can only send us to matched receiving booths. / / Young Adam: It's worse than that. That means whenever we go will already be under the influence of Nazis. / / Young Jamie: And the booths were only perfected after the war. There's no way we can stop the Nazis winning. / / Young Adam: Hmmm. / / Young Jamie: And we have no dynamite to sabotage them. / / Young Adam: Oh my. That's even worse. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2966.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2967 | Jane Goodall: History is messed up worse than we thought. / / Yeti: It's worse than that. According to these readings, right now there are also other time travellers in London, Oxford, and 1947. / / Jane Goodall: There's obviously a time nexus around the Second World War. / / Yeti: Oh my. That's even worse. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2967.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2968 | Dwalin: It's wurse than we thocht. There're signs o' a stroogle. [[translation: It's worse than we thought. There are signs of a struggle.]] / / Kyros: It's worse than that. If Lambert's been kidnapped or killed in his sleep, any of us could be next. / / Alvissa: We have to find him. And the culprit. Or else we'll never find the Ruby of Dwarven Might and collect the reward for our quest. / / Mordekai: Oh my. That's even worse! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2968.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2969 | Monty: Thanks Sallah. It seems the situation is worse than we thought. / / Sallah: It's worse than that, Monty. The Nazis have started a program to colonise Mars using atomic rockets. / / Monty: Rockets and atomic power? They could use those to deliver atomic bombs anywhere in the world! / / Sallah: Oh my. That's even worse. / / Minnesota Jones: Have we reached worst yet? / / Prof. Jones: No, I'm hungry! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2969.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2970 | Man in Black: You should't have done that. There's no such thing as Nigerians genuinely offering money in exchange for bank account details. / / Ishmael: Always so cynical, you are! This is what's wrong with the world today! Sometimes you just have to trust people! / / Loren: The last three people you've spoken to are a Martian robot disguised as a human, who tried to sabotage an attempt to save Earth from destruction... / / Loren: ... a guy who denies eveything, and someone claiming to be the Nigerian Finance Minister who wanted your bank details. / / Ishmael: Your point?? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2970.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2971 | Police Officer: 'Ello 'ello 'ello, what's all this then? / / Student: These people are Nazi spies! / / Police Officer: That's a jolly rum thing, then. Righto, me lovelies, you're nicked! You lot are 'ereby under arrest for spying! / / Mercutio: I almost feel like I want to say, "It's a fair cop." http://irregularwebcomic.net/2971.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2972 | Prof. Jones: Right. Let's get out of here. Where's the old escape tunnel, Sallah? / / Sallah: Do you think I'd still be waiting in here if the escape tunnel still existed? / / Prof. Jones: Er... right. Then you must have a guard bribed or something. / / Sallah: Professor Jones, the Nazis have become competent. / / Prof. Jones: What??!! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2972.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2973 | Yeti: I've switched off their nutrients. Hitler's clones are dead. / / Jane Goodall: That's a start. But we need to get history back on track. It's like space-time has folded in on itself. / / Jane Goodall: We have an alternate history and time travellers are all over the place. / / Steve: And we've killed a dozen Hitlers already! We're winning! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2973.html |
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