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| Irregular Webcomic! #2764 | Iki Piki: Hooray! We landed safely! / / Serron: Now we just need to deliver our cargo of precious transplant organs. / / Iki Piki: Who are we delivering them to? / / Serron: Our lives have been a little too safe lately. I think we need some excitement, don't you? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2764.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2765 | Young Jamie: So Mars is inhabited! Myth confirmed! / / Martian 1: Greetings. We are the last three Martians. / / Young Adam: By a dying race! Myth confirmed! / / Martian 2: I didn't know humans had flying saucer technology. / / Martian 1: You idiot! That's one of ours! / / Young Jamie: Of superior intellect! Myth busted! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2765.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2766 | Prof. Jones: Montana! My boy! / / Prof. Jones: I always meant to tell him how proud I was of his achievements, and now it's too late! / / Minnesota Jones: You always took him for granite? / / Prof. Jones: If we could just start over again! A clean slate! / / Minnesota Jones: That would be gneiss. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2766.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2767 | Alvissa: It's amazing that you could kill a Balrog by dropping rocks on it. / / Lambert: It's basalt with a deadly weapon. / / Dwalin: As long as it cannae breccia it's way oot. / / Draak: It need be much tuff to do that. / / Mordekai: We don't want to get jaded about it. / / Lambert: Right, no taking it for granite. / / Kyros: Enough! With my newfound power, I can lead you forth to the pumiced land! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2767.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2768 | Iki Piki: We're delivering these organs to black market organleggers, aren't we? / / Serron: What makes you say that? / / Iki Piki: Because we already did that! Back in the past, when we were in the future, before you destroyed the universe! / / Iki Piki: This is the same splanch that got transplanted into me, isn't it?! / / Iki Piki: It's the same splanch that's in my body right now!! / / Serron: So you'd say it's an urgent delivery, then? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2768.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2769 | Jamie: A giant frog? What's that doing here? / / Head Paradox: Ribbit. / / Adam: I don't... / / Adam: ...aaargh... <gurgle>! / / Jamie: And now it's jumped down your throat?! But it's bigger than your mouth! That's a logical impossibility! / / Jamie: In fact... some sort of paradox. / / Adam: <choke>! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2769.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2770 | Terry: So how do we stop Hitler's Brain? / / Steve: I already said how. I'll wrestle 'im! / / Terry: What can we do that could possibly win the war? / / Steve: I'll wrestle 'im!! / / Terry: What possible sensible option do we have? / / Steve: I'll wrestle 'im!!! / / Jane Goodall: I think Steve should wrestle Hitler's Brain. / / Steve: You do?? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2770.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2771 | Long Tom: Below decks! Let's be seein' if we can't be operatin' this underwater boat. / / Nazi Captain: Halt! / / [[scene change: the bridge of the U-boat]] / / Long Tom: I be makin' neither head nor tail o' these controls. They be labelled in some foreign gibberish. / / Long Tom: Where be "Rpedo"? / / Dirque: It be in Portugal, I be thinkin', cap'n. / / Long Tom: Well this control be marked to say it be goin' to there. Let's be pressin' it! / / Wendy: Aye cap'n! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2771.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2772 | [[scene: The Head Paradox's office]] / / SFX: RIIING / / Receptionist: Hello? / / Receptionist: What? You want us to pay for 38 tons of dynamite we ordered? We never ordered that. / / Receptionist: Well obviously, if we had ordered it we would pay for it, but we're not. Q.E.D. Thank you for calling the Paradox Department. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2772.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2773 | Prof. Jones: Oh, this is terrible! My only son turned to stone by the gaze of a Gorgon! / / Prof. Jones: He was only out of sight for a few seconds! / / Prof. Jones: Wait. That means the Gorgons must be nearby. We need to be careful, Pop. / / Prof. Jones: Pop!!! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2773.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2774 | Kyros: I've had enough of these shenanigans. Let's get out of here. / / Dwalin: "Shenanigans"? That's a Dwarven word. Where'd ye pick that oop? [[translation: "Shenanigans"? That's a Dwarven word. Where did you learn that?]] / / Kyros: I've had a little language training. / / [[beat]] / / Dwalin: Is that a short joke? / / Kyros: Just a wee bit. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2774.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2775 | Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: Something's happening. Someone's choking on a giant frog. I can feel it. / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: Where? / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: Here. On the Infinite Featureless Plane of Death. / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: But... it's Infinite. And Featureless. How will you find them? / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: Isn't it obvious? / / [[screenshot of Google Maps: Infinite Featureless Plane of Death, showing route from "Here" to "Someone Choking On A Giant Frog"]] http://irregularwebcomic.net/2775.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2776 | [[scene: The Legacy engine room]] / / Iki Piki: Bye Spanners. Serron and I are going to deliver the organs to the black marketeer who our past selves will later steal them from. / / Spanners: Whatever you do, don't meet and talk to your other selves! / / Iki Piki: But won't that cause some sort of temporal paradox? After all, we already did it. / / Spanners: Yes, but look what happened last time! / / Iki Piki: Fair point. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2776.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2777 | Jamie: Poor Adam! Choking on a giant frog. If only there was some way to put him out of his misery. / / Adam: <hack> <choke> / / Jamie: Well, despite the fact that we're already dead. / / Adam: <cough> <splutter> / / Jamie: What's that, Adam? Look behind me? / / Jamie: 38 tons of dynamite? Now where did that come from? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2777.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2778 | SFX: JURRRZ! [[time machine appears]] / / Isaac Newton: Anton van Leeuwenhoek, you're needed on a journey through time to save the universe! / / Anton van Leeuwenhoek: But... I've just discovered tiny invisible creatures with my micro-scope! I need to learn more about them. / / Isaac Newton: They cause disease. Bread mould can kill them, but they mutate and grow stronger. / / Anton van Leeuwenhoek: Eeeeuuuw!! Get me out of this barbaric time! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2778.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2779 | Yeti: So, that's settled then. We just need to travel to Berlin. Tally ho! / / Jane Goodall: So what, we just hitch a ride with a friendly passing Luftwaffe pilot? / / Yeti: No! In this timeline, Britain built the R102 and R103 airships! They're based at the Cardington Airship Works. We commandeer one! / / Yeti: And by "commandeer" I mean "steal". / / Steve: Oooooh! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2779.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2780 | Young Jamie: So tell us about your ancient and noble Martian civilisation. / / Martian 1: Do you know how hard it is to get a decent frozen yoghurt here? / / Young Adam: Um, no. / / Martian 2: I'll give you a hint. We have no cattle. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2780.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2781 | Wendy: [[looking through periscope]] Cap'n, I be seein' the Allosaurus through this contraption! / / Wendy: Now ye be pressin' that button to be takin' this ship to Rpedo, do we just be leavin' our own ship here? / / SFX: Fwackoom! / / Wendy: Ne'er mind... http://irregularwebcomic.net/2781.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2782 | Prof. Jones: Now I'm between a rock and... well, another rock. / / Prof. Jones: It's like the Symplegades, the clashing rocks that Jason sailed through to find the Golden Fleece. / / Prof. Jones: The Fleece! Of course! It restores life to the recently dead! / / Prof. Jones: We just have to find it! Let's go Juni... Oh. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2782.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2783 | [[scene: Bune, a shady back alley]] / / Serron: Here are your organs, fresh from Rubilith. / / Shady Black Market Weapons Dealer: Excellent. / / Iki Piki: Say, what sort of business are you running here anyway? / / Shady Black Market Weapons Dealer: I deal in... legitimately acquired weapons and transplant organs. It's all above board. Honest. / / Serron: Aha! We're not legitimate suppliers! / / Shady Black Market Weapons Dealer: You're saying I should call the police on you? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2783.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2784 | Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: Wait. The entire crew of a Nazi U-boat just died of a completely non-paradoxical fireball in 1940. / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: What caused it? / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: Er... they were on board a 1650s pirate ship and the pirates fired a torpedo which exploded the powder magazine... / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: True, that's not strictly a paradox. / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: But you're supposed to be investigating paradoxes and avoiding fireballs! / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: Oh yeah. Darn. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2784.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2785 | Kyros: So where did we want to go? The Swamp of Terror? / / Kyros: Rocks of the Earth, Heed my Arcane Power! Carry us Forward to the Swamp of Terror!! / / SFX: rumble rumble... / / [[scene change: the Swamp of Terror]] / / Alvissa: Actually, our destination is the Golden Citadel. / / Kyros: Close enough. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2785.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2786 | Jamie: I seem to recall us detonating a huge amount of explosives on this Infinite Featureless Plane of Death before. / / Jamie: And that time, we returned to life! / / Adam: <choke> <gasp> / / Jamie: Well yes, the first time is just fun. The experimental confirmation is science! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2786.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2787 | Terry: The R102 and R103? But they were never built! The R101 crashed in 1930 and the British airship programme was scrapped. / / Yeti: Ah, you forget this is an alternate timeline. It therefore follows inevitably that airships are much more reliable and widespread. / / Jane Goodall: Naturally. But... that also implies... / / Terry: What? / / Yeti: Yes. / / Jane Goodall: Oh. My. God. / / Terry: What??!! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2787.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2788 | Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: Wait. The person choking on a giant frog is causing some sort of spatio-temporal paradox. / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: I sense it. And there's about to be an insanely overpowered fireball too. / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: Oh, too bad for you then, Mr Forbidden To Go Near People Killed By Fireballs. / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: But they can't be killed by it... They're already dead! / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: Darn loopholes. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2788.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2789 | Prof. Jones: The Golden Fleece. I need to find the Golden Fleece. It's the only way to save Pop and Junior. / / Prof. Jones: Ah, there's a museum attendant. I'll ask her if she knows anything about it. / / Prof. Jones: Excuse me! Do you happen to... Oh!! / / [[Prof. Jones is turned to stone]] http://irregularwebcomic.net/2789.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2790 | Lambert: The Swamp of Terror! We finally made it! / / [[beat]] / / Lambert: So which direction do we go? / / Alvissa: No idea. / / Mordekai: Search me. / / Kyros: Dunno. / / Dwalin: I dinnae ken. [[translation: I don't know.]] / / Draak: Draak not have clue. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2790.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2791 | Edmond Halley: We have the most significant natural philosophers of the past 400 years. What now, Mr Newton? / / Isaac Newton: We collect ones from the next 400 years. / / Edmond Halley: The future! What fantastic wonders await us? / / Isaac Newton: I think you will like the frozen yoghurt, Mr Halley. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2791.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2792 | Serron: Now that we've concluded our business... Who are the prisoners you've got locked in a cell in there?! / / Iki Piki: Serron! No! / / Shady Black Market Weapons Dealer: What?! How dare you accuse me, a humble and totally above board businessman! / / Serron: We'll just see for ourselves! Step aside! [[barges into the Shady Black Market Weapons Dealer's building]] / / Iki Piki: Well this can only go horribly wrong in about fifteen different ways. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2792.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2793 | Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: But wait. Those guys originally died in a fireball that created a temporal paradox in the first place. That you must investigate, but are now forbidden to go near. / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: Hmm... true. But... hey! You can do me a favour! Investigate the paradox for me! / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: A good plan, with but one fatal flaw. / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: What's that? / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: Why would I ever want to do you a favour? / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: Curse you, Choking! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2793.html |
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