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| Irregular Webcomic! #2431 | [[Ron and Hermione standing in a Hogwarts corridor]] / / [[Harry appears out of nowhere]] / / Hermione: Harry! Where did you appear from? / / Harry: My Invisibility Cloak, remember? Is it safe? / / Hermione: Yes. You-Know-Who isn't around. / / Harry: I don't mean that. Is it safe yet to mention spoilers about what happens at the end of our sixth year at Hogwarts? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2431.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2432 | Steve: [[wrestling the Balrog]] Crikey! 'e 'asn't got much fight in 'im! / / Terry: Watch out Steve! He can burst into flame at will! / / Steve: Aha! Thanks for the info, Terry! / / Steve: C'mon then, you lazy bugger! Stop 'olding back!! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2432.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2433 | Jamie: We've been at war with the Martians ever since their botched rescue of a crashed saucer pilot at Roswell in 1947. / / Young Adam: But... that myth's been busted! The Roswell crash was just a weather balloon! / / Jamie: You mean in your timeline the government managed to cover it up successfully? / / Adam: Wow, our timelines really are seriously different. You got a competent government. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2433.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2434 | [[scene: The Infinite Featureless Plane of Death. Death of Being Wrestled To Death By Steve and Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs are sitting on chairs and watching something in the distance.]] / / Death of Being Wrestled To Death By Steve: So. Steve versus a Balrog, huh? / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: Steve's doomed once the Balrog unleashes his fire. / / Death of Being Wrestled To Death By Steve: No way. / / [[beat]] / / Death of Being Wrestled To Death By Steve: Pass the popcorn. / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: We don't even eat! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2434.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2435 | Monty: [[standing outside a field at night, guarded by Nazis]] The zeppelins are guarded. How are we going to get on board one? / / Prof. Jones: We impersonate German officers. / / Monty: And how are we going to do that? / / Prof. Jones: Simple. We speak English with a German accent. That should fool them! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2435.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2436 | Kyros: Actually there's still one option we haven't tried yet. We could get rid of the mountains. / / Alvissa: Oh right. And I suppose you have a way to do that? / / Kyros: Stand back. / / Alvissa: That was a rhetorical question! / / [[the other party members flee]] / / Kyros: Channelling mana! / / Alvissa: And the answer was "no"!! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2436.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2437 | Nigerian Finance Minister: Let's see then. Capital of Nigeria? Lagos... Abuja... / / Nigerian Finance Bureaucrat: <cough> / / Nigerian Finance Minister: I think that's probably Abuja. Lock it in. / / Host: It's locked in. / / Host: I thought you were from Nigeria. You were unsure of your own capital city? / / Nigerian Finance Minister: Oh! Capital city... I get it. Can I change my answer to Lagos? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2437.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2438 | Martian 2: Okay, we've successfully scouted the Earthling military base at Roswell. / / Martian 2: Let's chalk this mission up as a success and head home. / / SFX: CRASH! [[Martian 3's saucer crashes into the ground]] / / Martian 2: Yeah, that's not good. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2438.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2439 | Caption: The Vatican, 1610. / / Pope Paul V: So what heretical ideas have you suppressed lately? / / Man in Black: Galileo of Pisa claims there are moons around Jupiter. / / Pope Paul V: I hope you set him straight. / / Man in Black: He won't bother the Church again, Your Holiness. / / Pope Paul V: Splendid. / / Man in Black: Also, we have taken steps that will repress "The Macarena" for at least 400 years. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2439.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2440 | Serron: But space and time are intrinsically bound together, right? / / Spanners: Yes. / / Serron: So if hyperspace warps space, it stands to reason that it also warps time. / / Spanners: Yee... eesss... / / Serron: So by following a space-like trajectory through hyperspace, it should be possible to emerge in realspace at any time we choose. / / Spanners: How come your understanding of science improves dramatically when it leads to paradoxical and reality-damaging conclusions? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2440.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2441 | Young Jamie: Well, that's flying cars busted. We should go back to our own time. / / Young Adam: Hey, how about we send our older selves back and take their place in this time? See if people notice? That'd be cool! / / Jamie: It won't work. You're immature, easily excitable, and reckless. We're mature, sensible, and responsible. / / Adam: Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha hah! / / Jamie: It was worth a try. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2441.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2442 | Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: The Balrog's about to burst into flame! / / Death of Being Wrestled To Death By Steve: Steve's about to apply the death hold! / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: I can't bear to watch! / / Death of Being Wrestled To Death By Steve: The suspense is killing me! / / [[beat]] / / Death of Being Wrestled To Death By Steve: You know what I mean. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2442.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2443 | [[scene: Mars. Martian 2 is reporting back via a holographic display, from Earth]] / / Martian 2: Bad news. Saucer 3 has crashed. / / Martian 1: You must recover it! We can't let Martian technology fall into Earthling hands! At any cost! / / Martian 2: Right. I'll recover the saucer and the pilot. / / Martian 1: Pilot? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2443.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2444 | Ginny: Let me deal with the guards. / / Monty: Okay. / / Monty: She's probably going to seduce them or something... / / Ginny: Guards! Arrest these spies! Take them to Berlin! / / [[beat]] / / Monty: You know, trusting her is like trusting Russian roulette. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2444.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2445 | Host: It's too late to change your answer, but luckily Abuja is the capital of Nigeria! Now, for $500, which of these is a financially responsible investment plan? / / Host: A. Clicking web browser pop-ups on file-sharing sites. B. Playing the lottery. / / Host: C. Responding to unsolicited e-mails with your bank account details. D. Buying stocks and bonds. / / Nigerian Finance Minister: Well, they all look pretty good to me. Although D can be a bit risky sometimes. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2445.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2446 | Alvissa: You can't really remove a mountain range, can you? / / Kyros: Rocks melt, don't they? / / Alvissa: Right... The mountains are just a couple of miles away. Are we at a safe distance by any chance? / / Kyros: What's this "safe distance" concept? / / Alvissa: I thought so. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2446.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2447 | Iki Piki: Time travel? Are you suggesting we go back to our own future, rather than relive our early adventures? / / Serron: Yeah. This is boring. We've already done this. More or less. / / Iki Piki: Reliving our past does have the advantage that we know we didn't destroy the universe during these first few cargo trips. / / Serron: That we know of. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2447.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2448 | [[scene: a study]] / / Caption: Cambridge, 1837. / / Charles Darwin: So, putting together all the evidence from my voyages on the Beagle... / / Charles Darwin: The distribution of plants and animals, the variety of finches in the Galapagos Islands... It all means... / / [[beat]] / / Charles Darwin: Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2448.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2449 | Steve: Crikey! Show some spirit! / / Terry: A Balrog is a spirit entity, Steve. You can't defeat it. / / Steve: Wait... I think 'e's dead! / / Terry: What? How...? / / [[scene change: the Infinite Featureless Plane of Death]] / / Death of Being Wrestled To Death By Steve: And the fans go wild!!! / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: Oh well. There's always next year. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2449.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2450 | Caption: Roswell, 1947. / / Man: It was a flying saucer! I done seen it, I tell you! / / Man in Black: There's no such thing as flying saucers. What you saw was a weather balloon. / / Martian 3: Yes, Earthling. I'm not a Martian, and we have no secret plans to invade Earth. / / Man in Black: See? / / Man: [[fleeing]] Aaaaaarrrrr...!!! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2450.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2451 | Young Adam: So what other myths can we bust with a time machine? / / Young Jamie: Pretty much any historical myth... / / Young Adam: I know! We'll go back before World War II and try to kill Hitler! / / Adam: Now why would anyone want to do that? / / Young Jamie: A.k.a. "How much more can we mess up history?" http://irregularwebcomic.net/2451.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2452 | Man in Black: Galileo still claims there are moons around Jupiter. / / Pope Paul V: What shall be done? / / Man in Black: The usual procedure with scientists. We lock him in a tower until he recants. / / Pope Paul V: Very good. Time and again, the Church gets proven results with this scientific method. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2452.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2453 | [[scene: Berlin]] / / Erwin: Herr Kolonel! We have captured die Joneses in Friedrichshafen! They are being brought to Berlin! / / Haken: At last, we shall have our revenge! / / Erwin: Revenge for what? / / Haken: All of die times they have been captured und brought to Berlin before, only to escape when we least expect it! / / Hitler's Brain: Do you think they might escape this time? / / Haken: I expect not! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2453.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2454 | Alvissa: If you melt the Orcrift Mountains, lava will spread for miles in all directions! / / Alvissa: You'll create a desolate wasteland of slag and bare rock which will remain barren for generations to come! / / Alvissa: Forevermore will the name of Kyros live in infamy as one of the most destructive forces this world has known! / / Kyros: Is this meant to be a disincentive? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2454.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2455 | Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: Can't you share him with me? You get lots of good collections. / / Death of Being Wrestled To Death By Steve: You know the rules. / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: Why does Death have to be a bureaucracy, so full of rules? Why can't we run things as an anarchy? / / Death of Being Wrestled To Death By Steve: Seriously, can you imagine what the world would be like if Death was unpredictable? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2455.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2456 | Spanners: No! Absolutely not! / / Spanners: I refuse to sanction any action that has a better than even chance of destroying the entire universe again! / / [[beat]] / / Iki Piki: So why are you travelling with Serron again? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2456.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2457 | [[scene: Roswell Army Air Field, New Mexico]] / / General: Tell us what you want from Earth! Is it slaves? Feed stock? Lebensraum? Our women?? / / Martian 3: Your puny intellect is incapable of comprehending our motives. / / General: Bah! Take him away! / / Martian 3: Do you know how hard it is to get a decent frozen yoghurt on Mars? http://irregularwebcomic.net/2457.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2458 | Young Jamie: I think we're done here. Let's go bust some more time travel myths. / / Young Adam: Right. Let's go back and visit my grandfather as a child! / / Young Jamie: See you in about 27 years! / / SFX: ZUUUURCHHH! [[Young Adam and Young Jamie disappear with their time machine]] / / Adam: Kids these days. / / Jamie: You means kids those days. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2458.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2459 | Edmond Halley: Mr Newton, you really should have attended the theatre with me yesterday to take in the pantomime play. / / Edmond Halley: As each character appeared, the children would cheer or boo! Then a rival character would appear and they would all make the other noise! / / Edmond Halley: I suppose you could say that for each actor there was an equal and opposite re-actor. / / Isaac Newton: Hmmm... / / Edmond Halley: That Shakespeare really is a genius of children's literature. http://irregularwebcomic.net/2459.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #2460 | [[scene: Steve and Terry's house]] / / SFX: Riiing! / / [[scene change: Jane Goodall's office, in Africa]] / / Jane Goodall: [[into phone]] Terry, it's Jane. I hear you have a Balrog in the area. Can you and Steve capture it and make sure nothing happens to it? / / [[scene change: Steve and Terry's house]] / / Terry: [[into phone]] Er... That may be a little difficult. [[Steve is covering the dead Balrog with a sheet.]] / / Terry: [[into phone]] But how did you know there's a Balrog near us? / / Jane Goodall: [[over phone]] Oh please. I'm Jane freakin' Goodall! http://irregularwebcomic.net/2460.html |
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