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| Irregular Webcomic! #3066 | Shakespeare: It's so satisfying writing something meaningful for a change, instead of technical documentation. / / Shakespeare: Is there anything you ever wanted to do more than anything, Ophelia? / / Ophelia: Um... it's silly, but I always wanted to be a director. Making the magic of a story come to life on stage or screen. / / Shakespeare: Like Harry Potter! / / Ophelia: Sort of... only less magical. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3066.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3067 | Isaac Newton: So, what is the plan? / / Charity Collector Guy: We need to grow a copy of one of the most evil men in history and transplant his original brain into the copy. / / Isaac Newton: Oh, right, simple. / / Isaac Newton: Why don't you get us to figure out why the planets move, or how old the Earth is, or how life evolved, while we're at it? http://irregularwebcomic.net/3067.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3068 | Monty: If someone manages to catch the hare and cut it open to get Koschei's egg, the duck will escape and fly away. / / Prof. Jones: And what if someone catches the duck and cuts it open? / / Monty: Well, then they get the egg, I suppose. / / Prof. Jones: Pretty lousy protection for your immortal soul. I'd think a safety deposit box would be better. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3068.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3069 | SFX: Fwackoom! / / [[The tavern is a smoldering pile of ashes]] / / Lambert: Well, that's another tavern we've burnt to the ground. / / Kyros: Hey, it was only indirectly my fault this time. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3069.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3070 | [[scene: in front of the burning Reichstag]] / / Loren: Time to go, back to our own times. / / Erwin: Auf wiedersehen. / / Ishmael: Wait. While we're here, can't we kill Hitler or something, to prevent World War II? / / Loren: Do you realise that question or variants thereof has been asked so many times that there are no original or funny answers left? / / [[Loren, Ishmael, Giuseppe, the Man in Black, and Young Adam and Jamie vanish]] http://irregularwebcomic.net/3070.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3071 | Charity Collector Guy: [[walking]] Right. Hitler's giving a speech in the Reichstag in an hour. We need to collect a cell sample before that happens. / / Steve: A sample? Simple! / / Charity Collector Guy: Then the building will burn down. / / Steve: Crikey! Who'd do a thing like that? / / Jane Goodall: Maybe you should stay in the building and check it out. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3071.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3072 | Paris: It's good to be in space, where things are predictable. / / Iki Piki: Bizarre space anomaly, dead ahead! / / [[beat]] / / Paris: See? This sort of thing happens all the time. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3072.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3073 | [[Ardaxar stands over the adventurers]] / / Mordekai: Well, this is it then. We're doomed. / / Mordekai: Kyros's powers of fire, earth, and water have all failed! / / Air Elemental: [[appearing]] Have you thought about trying Air? / / Lambert: Well blow me down... http://irregularwebcomic.net/3073.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3074 | [[scene: Young Adam and Jamie's dorm room]] / / [[Loren, Ishmael, Giuseppe, the Man in Black, and Young Adam and Jamie appear]] / / Loren: Back to a more civilised time! / / Ishmael: The 1980s? / / Loren: We'll take what we can get. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3074.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3075 | Shakespeare: Well, this is wonderful! I'm seeing a whole new side to you, Ophelia. So what sort of movies would you make? / / Ophelia: I was thinking of a story of two star-crossed lovers who somehow travel through time and have to save the world from the ravages of war... / / [[beat]] / / Shakespeare: You know "star-crossed" means "doomed", right? / / Opehlia: Shut up and kiss me. / / [[they kiss]] http://irregularwebcomic.net/3075.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3076 | Monty: To find Koschei's egg, we need to find the mysterious island of Buyan. / / Ginny: Rumoured to be the island known today as Rügen, off the Baltic coast of northern Germany. / / Monty: Exactly. / / Prof. Jones: That's an awfully big island. How are we ever going to find the hiding spot? / / Monty: We know it's under a tree. / / Prof. Jones: Oh, my mistake. Trivial then. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3076.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3077 | Kyros: Air? What sort of wimpy elemental power is that? / / Air Elemental: Why don't you give it a whirl? / / Alvissa: A whirl? A whirlwind! Kyros, try making a tornado! / / Air Elemental: What the lady said. She's a real airhead. / / Alvissa: Hey!! / / Air Elemental: It's a compliment! http://irregularwebcomic.net/3077.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3078 | Yeti: Hitler's office is this way, past the prisoner cells. / / Young Adam: Hey! Let us out! / / Steve: Crikey! Prisoners! Let's rescue 'em! / / Charity Collector Guy: No. Time is already folded. We don't want to make any more changes than we absolutely have to. / / Giuseppe: [[singing]] 'O sole mio! / / Jane Goodall: So, killing this guy is okay? http://irregularwebcomic.net/3078.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3079 | Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: What about my promotion? / / Head Death: What? / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: I offed the frog. No matter of mine where or how. / / Head Death: Hmmm. Very well. You are now Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs. / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: Awesome! After all these years! / / Head Death: Get to the Reichstag in 1933. It's just been engulfed in a huge fireball. / / Death of Choking On A Giant Frog: The Reichstag on fire, eh? I sense this is the beginning of something truly wonderful... http://irregularwebcomic.net/3079.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3080 | Loren: And now we have to return to our own time. Bye. / / Ishmael: Hey, this room looks... / / [[Loren, Ishmael, and the Man in Black disappear]] / / Young Jamie: Hey, what about his own time! He's from 1933! This is the 1980s! / / Giuseppe: Eh, I am Italian. A little bit late does not matter. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3080.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3081 | Kyros: Forces of Air, obey my command! Bring forth a tornado of utter destruction! / / Barkeep: Well, at least some of the furniture survived. That'll make rebuilding the tavern cheaper. / / SFX: Whoooosh!! [[tornado hits the tavern, not the dragon, destroying all the furniture]] / / SFX: Twist! Crunch!!!! Splinter! http://irregularwebcomic.net/3081.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3082 | Isaac Newton: He is our electrician! / / Yeti: Him? I told you to pick up Alessandro Volta! / / Isaac Newton: In the list of names you have not sent me yet? / / Yeti: Stop messing with causality to justify your actions! http://irregularwebcomic.net/3082.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3083 | [[beat]] / / Ophelia: Will... / / Shakespeare: Ophelia... I... / / Winston Churchill: [[appearing]] Aha! There you are! I'm giving a speech in half an hour. Write me something inspiring. Emotionally uplifting, you know the sort of thing. / / Shakespare: Yes, Prime Minister! I think I know just the thing! http://irregularwebcomic.net/3083.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3084 | Paris: Iki Piki! What is it?! / / Iki Piki: According to these readings, it's... a long, thin, triangular rent in space-time. / / Iki Piki: But instead of forcing dimensions apart like you'd expect, it's somehow pulling them closer together. / / Paris: You mean... it's some sort of negative space wedgie? / / Iki Piki: With a swirly energy thingy behind it! http://irregularwebcomic.net/3084.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3085 | Ardaxar: Ha ha! Good aim, elementalist! Now, after all four elements, your failure is complete! / / Kyros: Oh, I know wind alone would never hurt you. / / Kyros: That's why I dropped the tornado in the nearest source of flying debris. / / Ardaxar: Huh? / / SFX: splorch / / Ardaxar: Uh oh... http://irregularwebcomic.net/3085.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3086 | Prof. Jones: So, north then. That most mysterious of directions, full of danger, trepidation, and horrors beyond the ken of man. / / Monty: Indeed. Lands bound with ice and snow. Vast and hostile landscapes that strip souls to the bone. / / Monty: The howling winds of the Wendigo. Trackless and cyclopean wastes populated only by wolves, bears, and worse. / / Prof. Jones: Actually, I was talking about lutefisk. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3086.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3087 | Young Jamie: But you're from 1933! What can you do in the 1980s? The whole world is changed! / / Young Adam: Can you make pizza? / / Giuseppe: I am from Napoli! I make the best pizza! / / Young Adam: Simple then. This is a university town. Open a pizzeria and you'll be set for life. / / Giuseppe: Bellissima! / / Young Adam: And we get discounts, don't forget. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3087.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3088 | Charity Collector Guy: We'd need the key to get him out. We don't have time. Let's go. / / Terry: For all the time travel going on around here, there seems to be an awful lot of last minute rushing around. / / [[beat]] / / [[beat]] / / [[beat]] / / [[beat]] / / [[beat]] / / Isaac Newton: Time is far too precious a resource to waste. Let us go. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3088.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3089 | [[scene: The Infinite Featureless Plane of Death]] / / Ardaxar: Wha...? Where am I? What happened? / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: YOU WERE RUN THROUGH THE SPLEEN WITH A TOOTHPICK. / / Ardaxar: How monumentally and ultimately humiliating. / / Death of Insanely Overpowered Fireballs: LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE. YOU'LL NEVER HAVE TO LIVE IT DOWN. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3089.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3090 | [[scene: On board a zeppelin]] / / Long Tom: Arrrr! What be our position? / / Wendy: The charts be sayin' we be over La Scala in Milan, the famous opera house! / / Long Tom: Opera? Bah! I be hatin' it! Let's be pillagin' it! / / Wendy: Arrrrr! Piracy on the high Cs! http://irregularwebcomic.net/3090.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3091 | Kyros: Oh yeah. Four Balrogs... and an ancient red dragon. / / Lambert: So what do we do now? / / Mordekai: Loot the body! The hide and blood are worth a fortune! / / Lambert: I mean after that. / / Mordekai: Loot his lair. The Golden Citadel! / / Lambert: After that. / / Mordekai: Wining and wenching, baby! http://irregularwebcomic.net/3091.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3093 | Isaac Newton: Oooh, my head is spinning... / / Terry: Just take it easy for a minute. / / Terry: How are we going to get a cell sample from Hitler without him knowing? / / Charity Collector Guy: We go into his office when he's not there and find a flake of skin. / / Terry: Hmmm. That's a very reasonable answer. / / Charity Collector Guy: I'm a very reasonable person. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3093.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3094 | Ginny: It's imperative we stop the Nazi war effort. They're working on an atomic bomb. / / Monty: "Atomic bomb?" / / Ginny: It will have the destructive force of hundreds of tons of TNT, and produce lethal radiation across a mile or more! / / Monty: Hmmm. You could shelter in a metal box, like a refrigerator. / / Ginny: Don't be stupid! That would never save you! http://irregularwebcomic.net/3094.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3095 | [caption]: ==Mythbusters== Could care less / / Jamie: Today's myth is that the increasingly common saying "I could care less" means something similar to "I don't care at all". / / Jamie: But if you could care less than you currently do, that must mean you do care. The correct saying is really "I couldn't care less". / / Jamie: Isn't that interesting, Adam? / / Adam: Eh. I could care less. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3095.html |
| Irregular Webcomic! #3096 | Mordekai: You know, why was there even a tavern here? There's nothing nearby except a deadly red dragon and the desolation of the Swamp of Terror. / / Lambert: My cousin Bilbert lived three years in a place just like this. / / Mordekai: Really? How did he survive? / / Lambert: Oh, hobbits can live anywhere. / / Mordekai: They can? / / Lambert: Of course. Anywhere a hobbit goes, there's a hobbit-at. http://irregularwebcomic.net/3096.html |
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